@TNP said:

Dear @tragedyjones.

I'm a relatively young Ventrue who was Embraced during college. None of my friends know I died or that I'm now a creature of the night. They think I just disappeared for a few years due to a breakdown from stress (I was pre law). I still maintain contact with them for dinner and theatre dates and they don't have a clue.

My problem is that now we're in our thirties, they're starting to get married. I've already had to miss three weddings because they were scheduled for noon. My coterie says I should just break ties with them but I don't want to do that.

My question is this: a fourth friend just got engaged and they're setting the date. Should I dominate them into an evening ceremony or just resign myself to another missed wedding? Do I still need to buy a wedding gift for them if I'm not going?

Asleep During Daytime

Asleep During Daytime, you have a few ways to handle this. First, you're young and new to your Requiem. If you are durable enough, and as a Ventrue you may know some Resilience, you could try and be a badass and attend the wedding, at least the ceremony, and leave early claiming you aren't feeling well - the sunburn will help corroborate your story. If you're fully fed you can survive an hour or two in the daylight without taking any aggravated wounds, but be sure to have a snack planned.

If you are already considering Dominating them to alter the ceremony, perhaps you can do that, but this is a dangerous path. It only gets easier to break people after the first try. Are they your friends then, or just meat-puppets to bend to your will?

And yes, you should send a gift. Especially if they are well to do in the mortal world, you should continue to cultivate those allies!