Questions of Etiquette


  • Pitcrew

    Everyone has different expectations, but here's a place to ask questions of MU etiquette to get an idea of what folks think is reasonable. I think there may have been a similar topic once but with the sites wonder search feature I couldn't find it.

    First question!

    You page someone and they don't respond. How long do you wait before paging again to see if they disconnected/missed your pose/chose to ignore you?

    I always lean way to far on the side of caution for avoid being "that guy".. but that tends to have me wait too long. I typically wait an hour or more before trying again. What about you?



  • I wait like 15 minutes then page again once before moving on with my life. If they're busy we can touch base later or I can mail if it's important.


  • Pitcrew

    @wildbaboons said in Questions of Etiquette:

    You page someone and they don't respond. How long do you wait before paging again to see if they disconnected/missed your pose/chose to ignore you?

    It depends.

    If we've been actively chatting (back and forth, with responses within a minute or two), I'll nudge after just a few minutes.

    If we haven't been, but I double-check and verify they aren't idle on the WHO (esp. if I know they don't use an idle timer), I'll usually ask if they saw it (in case of spam, y'know?) after about 15-20 minutes.


  • Pitcrew

    15-45 minutes is my jam, then I move on.

    If they are very idle, it will all be lost in spam anyway.

    If they hate me, they are stupid!


  • Coder

    I just check see if they are idle. If after 20 minutes of no response and they're not idle I assume one of two things is happening:

    1. They are busy and spammed and missed it, and I will page once more.

    2. They have an idle timer, and I will still page once more.

    Anything more than that I consider I am being a petulant punk and they obviously don't want to talk to me if they are available so... go do other things.


  • Pitcrew

    About 15-30 then try the next day to reach them. Still no response? I know where the relationship stands.

    you're dead to me


  • Politics

    @wildbaboons said in Questions of Etiquette:

    You page someone and they don't respond. How long do you wait before paging again to see if they disconnected/missed your pose/chose to ignore you?

    It depends on why I'm paging them.

    If I need their attention quickly, I will page once, and then again in 10 minutes or so. After that, if I need to ask a question or relay a message, I will send a @mail.

    Otherwise, I page once and that's it.



  • I'm a chronic idler, I spend a lot of my time online pacing and ruminating.

    MUSH @mail is how I prefer to be reached.


  • Pitcrew

    @wildbaboons said in Questions of Etiquette:

    You page someone and they don't respond. How long do you wait before paging again to see if they disconnected/missed your pose/chose to ignore you?

    Honestly I wait until the next time I see them on, unless it is dealing with a situation that is being played out at that moment there is nothing game related that can't wait til the next day.


  • Admin

    @wildbaboons said in Questions of Etiquette:

    You page someone and they don't respond. How long do you wait before paging again to see if they disconnected/missed your pose/chose to ignore you?

    I'd stalk the +who list to see what their idle is. They might be using a keepalive or something of course, but if I can see they are 5h idle then I'd know they aren't just not talking to me specifically.

    But generally speaking if I tried to talk to someone a couple of times and either got no answer or uninterested ones then I'd stop trying, unless I had reasons to believe it might be something I did in which case the last page had better have been an apology.


  • Pitcrew

    I would like to change my answer to, "I would page every 90 seconds with a healthy smattering of 'I THOUGHT YOU LIKED ME, WHY DON'T YOU PAGE ME BACK!' and a final, 'FINE! FUCK YOU!' once I was about 11 minutes in."


  • Pitcrew

    @haven said in Questions of Etiquette:

    I would like to change my answer to, "I would page every 90 seconds with a healthy smattering of 'I THOUGHT YOU LIKED ME, WHY DON'T YOU PAGE ME BACK!' and a final, 'FINE! FUCK YOU!' once I was about 11 minutes in."

    This is the "that guy" that I referenced above.


  • Pitcrew

    @wildbaboons said in Questions of Etiquette:

    @haven said in Questions of Etiquette:

    I would like to change my answer to, "I would page every 90 seconds with a healthy smattering of 'I THOUGHT YOU LIKED ME, WHY DON'T YOU PAGE ME BACK!' and a final, 'FINE! FUCK YOU!' once I was about 11 minutes in."

    This is the "that guy" that I referenced above.

    You should be flattered! How romantic.
    alt text



  • @shincashay said in Questions of Etiquette:

    About 15-30 then try the next day to reach them. Still no response? I know where the relationship stands.

    you're dead to me

    bats eyes