@Auspice That is so not terrible.
If it makes you feel any better, I hadn't done any needlework in years until about a little over a month ago. Doll clothes burnout like whoa. ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL of that shit was beaded/ribbon embroidered/sequinned/etc. all over the frickin' place, and all at teensywee scale. The pic above was the over the top one, though. 300+ hours on that from sketch to completion, and probably cost me $250+ for all that went into it all, no joke. (I miss you, 90s time and budget and optimism, even if it took me this long to get back to this.)
I have a concept I've been refining for... two weeks now? And just got around to the 3rd round of prelim testing last night after two false starts. (Read: 'This looks OK but for the amount of work this is gonna be, it needs to be better than this.' Wash, rinse, repeat.)
Partway through I realized I'd have to order special materials for it due to the size, because they weren't 'can get it at Michael's', and while there were options at amazon...
(It's full of fractional stitches. I hate me.)
...something too specific for amazon was going to make me hate life less.
I am now in that weird blend of 'anxious and super excited' because I just ordered the 'dammit I didn't want to spend this money!' fabric.
And that weird blend of anxious and super excited and 'oh gods I don't wanna clean the workspace please gods no' re: debating whether I should just wait a few months to order colors I will need for $$$, or wait one month and spend $$ (and fucktons of time and energy) to dye something custom (that may or may not work and result in having wasted $$ + time + energy and require waiting longer and spending $$$ on colors anyway).
If I could ramp down my default setting from 'ZOMG OVERKILL', it would be nice. But, well. See competition design of doom for how well that ever goes.
Irony: this design was supposed to be the easier one. It still is, but... the other thing I wanna do is converting this gorgeous carpet design I found? Which is dirt simple normally. Unless the carpet you wanna convert is one of those hyperdetailed tiny knots silk ones, which this... turns out to be. (Zoom in... what makes it interesting makes it 'hahahahahahhaahaha I'm a crazy person!) That I would dye stuff for, and even have the stuff to dye in hand! Great deal, and I love me some tencel! Thank you, ebay! ...but even charting that fucking thing feels exhausting as fuck and this other thing is simpler.