@Ghost I wouldn't say I have nothing to show for it. Quite the contrary.
I have fantastic friends who I went on to meet IRL and who became an important part of the fabric of my life and who I wouldn't give up for anything. People who have had my back, enriched my world, and made life better for me just for being there.
There were times in my life when I was in such a black hole of misery that being able to jump on and talk nerd shit with MUSHers, or be involved in some story where I needed to know what happened next or where I was aware my character's absence would be detrimental to other people's...I mean...sometimes that gave me a reason to hold on and thus I am still here. Not saying that's universal for everyone but. No. I wouldn't say, at all, that it's brought nothing to my life.
And that's why, right alongside seeing the benefits of not doing it, I miss it, and am aware of what it's costing me to not do it.
Ambivalence for the win I guess.