Pretendy Fun Time Games
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@Auspice said in Pretendy Fun Time Games:
Funny enough, I just sidebar'd a bit in another thread about how much I hate how often 'my fun' is used these days. And 9 times out of 10 (in my own personal experience), it's used to excuse really shitty behavior. Sure, it's your fun, but this is a shared environment, yo. You don't go to a fancy restaurant and begin shouting your entire conversation (at least I hope not) because hey, other people.
The biggest reminder I always have, on a personal scale, of a 'my fun' person was someone who would mentally calculate out her char's future path... including how other characters are involved. Except she'd never tell those people. So when Bob would end up dating Suzie, she'd flip out at both Bob and Suzie OOCly because 'THAT'S NOT WHAT WAS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN' and go off and tell everyone else how Bob and Suzie ruined her fun because Bob was supposed to date HER... except she never told him any of this and just made assumptions.
My fun is all well and good... until it's negatively affecting other people. At which point: just write some damn fanfic.
The type you're describing seems to forget that once other people become involved, 'my fun' must necessarily morph into 'our fun', which is a partnership, not a dictatorship.
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That's why I leave/disengage, Ark. Is it worth fighting to stay at a place? Not usually. Is it worth creating a stink or complaining on game? No. IME staff is usually not open to listening, no matter how well they know/like you, at least not until things reach a tipping point. But is it worth discussing in a general community sense things I wish I saw more often? Yep.
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I will, have, and do hit the range from bring it up to complaining to martyring if I'm no having fun, because I know I'm not the only one. Bad staff, incomplete information, communication problems, if there's an issue I believe that it's socially responsible to make it known and, if possible, get it fixed.
Does it work? Sometimes, yes. Does it cause problems? Frequently. But you know what, I'm aware of what I'm doing and the reasons I'm doing it. I do not like to berate staff, or players, or games, but I more don't like these things to be antagonistic against the very things they are meant to include.
I may the exception that proves the rule, I don't know, but I can dissect a problem on a game and create stress on staff to fix it while still enjoying myself and respecting other players. I think this is the right thing to do, tho sometimes the wrong way to do it, so yeah.
I generally only leave a game when I'm bored.
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@Thenomain said in Pretendy Fun Time Games:
I generally only leave a game when I'm bored.
This is actually why I lean on 'variations in experience is more important than a balanced experience', for the record.
Even one's favorite thing gets dull as dishwater after a while if that's all you get.
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I've done that in the past Theno. I am at the stage of life currently though where I'm tired and I would like to just be a player (or not, as the case may be) and to just either enjoy things or fade. I will give any place 3 chances or 3 months, depending on the size and how much I am into the theme. If after 3 months of good faith effort on my part it still feels like there's not much in the way of meeting me halfway, or there's 3 strikes of asshole behavior, I fade. It keeps things drama free since generally no one gives a shit, if they're having fun and the people who are not generally will leave before me--and at this point my friends in the community have ways to contact me otherwise!
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@surreality said in Pretendy Fun Time Games:
@Thenomain said in Pretendy Fun Time Games:
I generally only leave a game when I'm bored.
This is actually why I lean on 'variations in experience is more important than a balanced experience', for the record.
Even one's favorite thing gets dull as dishwater after a while if that's all you get.
Which is why multi-sphere WoD games seem to last longer, even if each sphere is practically its own game.
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I don't run into drama often - or maybe I just don't care enough to recognise it as such when I do. If things get weird or awkward though my immediate inclination is to ignore and play through it, hopeful that it will just go away on its own, but very rarely try to act or actively try to resolve it.
I suspect it's not an ideal policy (although I still think it's not a bad one). My concern, always, is that I'll end up contributing to the awkwardness by voicing it either directly to the other player or more so to staff, who always have more fun and pleasant things to do than deal with some interpersonal issue.
If it ever gets to the point where I do make a stink though it's because I'm running out of options. At that stage either the issue goes away or I do.