I had lots of issues. I got lots of help. Thank you mushing community for all the help! I complied a list of things that helped me. Maybe it will help others.
- Don’t rp about anything one is ooc anxious or upset about. The rp can escalate and the bleed of ooc is often noticed.
- Don’t tell people ooc you are sad/stressed etc about roleplay. It can pressure them to adapt to that.
- Give lots of space to those who might be avoiding you. Don’t pose to them lots, contact them ooc or keep showing up where their character is.
- Don’t contact people repeatedly or super quickly. (Paging as soon as they log on, poking them on discord then the game, etc) Also don't huge/cuddle and etc unless one is sure such is okay.
- Be especially careful about tense rp that deals with romance/jealousy and etc. For some people (myself) the topic of romantic jealousy is best downplayed all together. .
- Keep the channels turned off during stressful times on a game to avoid saying things you will regret or even to dodge being baited.
- Ignore those who are trying to provoke one. Learn to walk away and turn the other cheek. Go find rp with those who want to rp with one instead.
- Go ic only if available and page allow those you are up for talking to. Feel free to page block those who stress you out and poke ooc.
- Learn to see things going wrong ic as an interesting story rather than an ooc slap in the face.
10, Remember that redemption rp can be amazing - It is good to keep that mind if things go horribly wrong.
11, Take a break short or long whenever the game is getting hard. Even just logging off for an hour and watching tv can help. Sometimes a longer break is needed though.
- Find other social outlets even if they are really small. Easier than done in the time of Covid.
- Get sunlight. It is easy for people on the spectrum to stay inside all the time and that lack of sunlight can increase anxiety/depression/hopeless/feeling unreal.
- See counselor. I started to see a counselor who specializes in anxiety and it helped immensely. Appointments can be done remotely too.
- Find other hobbies that one can do in addition to mushing - reading, watching tv, cooking, singing, learning a new language etc.
- Get some physical activity - doing even a small amount of light activity can be very helpful to improving one’s mood and outlook.
- Get sleep and at night if possible. When I got my most stressed on mushing I was working 11 pm to 7 am on a hospice unit. I didn’t sleep much.
- Check to see if projecting - I got very sad about my patients who passed and much of that sorrow I projected into extreme emotions toward other things. Nothing is ever an excuse for bad behavior, but self awareness can help one find coping tactics.
- Have a healthy diet: Eating junk can make one less healthy and more stressed and more emotionally fragile Some healthy proteins and veggies can do wonders.
- Consider connecting with one’s faith/culture if it will help. This won’t help everyone and is really case by case.
- Get back in touch with family if it will help. Again not for everyone, but can help some people.
- Discover baths - they are super relaxing and helpful!
- Consider Gardening! - it is outdoor activity that lends itself well to the time of social distancing and food shortages.
- Also walks! - They are simple and get one out moving and in the sun.
- Give back to one’s community - sewing masks, making disinfectant, delivering groceries to neighbors can help one feel connected in a time of crisis.
- Get a pet - Pets are wonderful and don’t care if you are socially awkward. However it is important to provide any pet one takes with excellent care.
- If one does apologize, never make excuses. There is no excuse for not treating someone else right. Nobody owes forgiveness. Keep any apologies simple, short and sincere. Be prepared not to be forgiven.
- Remember actions speak louder than words - acting right for a period of time, maybe a long period of time will do more to show good than lots of msb posts or words.
- Give back to a game as well - run prps, provide others with fun rp, make them pretty things - see what one can do to help others have fun.
- It's okay if others get epic things you don’t get. Be chill. Be happy for them.
- What others think o one is not one's business. Peeps are allowed to think bad of one. That is their right.
- Can’t please or win over everyone - some people will always dislike one. That is okay. Find others.
- Respect and uphold game rules a game posts. If one does not agree with staff/the rules. Find another game.
- It is okay to be sad, depressed and to cry even about the game. But get off game until this passes.
- One is the center of their story. Try not to get it stuck in one's head they need a certain person to include them or a certain invite into a special plot to have fun.
- And probably the hardest thing to learn can be that it is not all about oneself. Everyone has their own issues and problems and their own limits. To be an upstanding member of the mushing community not only ask for empathy, but to give empathy.
- Music - magical ,supernatural, beautiful, music has me believing in a god. It can very much effect one's mood. Nothing quite like logging off and dancing around to some music to get rid of mushing blues.
- Cut back on the news is Covid Anxiety is a factor in any of this.
I hope this helps, it helps me, these are the 37 rules I try to follow! It is largely compiled from things other mushers told me while I was struggling and some comes from counsler and google. Some I read on msb.
I wish you every happiness and success AB. I hope you find wonderful rp in a community that works well for you. But even more so I hope your real life goes well. I am sorry you have had such a difficult time lately and I hope that things go better. I think they can go better.