@nessa I feel the thing for me to take away from your post there is that you know what you want, and communicate clearly about it, and that you don't hinge your RP on specific other people.
Those are big deals. The last in particular is important -- to me -- to keep in mind when I run stories and plots. My story must not hinge on Joe and Bob being available. It needs to be possible for Sally and Sue to pick up, even if they weren't there for the earlier bits. If Joe and Bob don't turn up, hand Sally and Sue their own bits of plot so they have a reason to go talk to Joe and Bob, but also that they may attack the story quandary from their own angle.
There's never too many clues to hand out. Each character will have its own interpretation of what's going on. Customise a bit to their skill set and background, and you get overlapping threads that people can pursue and argue about. Communicating plot threads down the line, away from yourself, including more people.
Most plots do end up with a small handful of people making the final decisive choices in the end -- if for no other reason then because they were the ones signing on for the final Event. But before you get there, there's a long stretch of road where a lot of RP can be had, and a lot of people can be connected. I can only speak for myself (obviously) but I enjoy getting to participate in discussions or preparations for someone else's final stand as much as I get to make the final stand; we all take turns being the hero or hogging the spotlight.
