How to Escape the OOC Game
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(Disclaimer: I know going into writing this that it won't be popular with some personalities. However, for some people this might be good advice. If you're not attempting to fix the problem, then you're just complaining about it, so I'm offering a potential solution. This is on 'Mildly Constructive' so insulting responses are both unwelcome and will aid in validating this point)
Do you feel like you're caught up in an OOC ball of yarn you can't escape?
Are you tired of whatever potentially inaccurate reputation other opinionated players have applied to your persona?
Are you tired of players obsessing over who is who and want to get out of that cycle of behavior?
Do you just wanna role-play in peace without people trying to weigh/judge who they think you are?
Here's how:
Step 1: Stop using your MSB handle now. Create a new email address. Stop associating wiki logins with any known MSB handles or old nicknames. Delete any playlist entries and don't start new ones. Step one to getting out is understanding that people cannot easily track you, don't really know you, and if they cannot prove who you are, you can be who you are in peace.
Step 2: Let go of Hog Pit issues. With your newly created "persona", getting into furballs on the Hog Pit will result in your typical wording being scrutinized. Fuck it. Let it go. OR don't let it go and continue, because you followed step 1 and your new charbit is clean (but I recommend letting go of the hog pit type negativity).
Step 3: People will inevitably try to figure out who you are. They'll associate PBs to you. They will ask you where you've played. They will try to figure out which state youre in. Don't bite that hook. I'm going to provide you with a thing you can copy and paste to sidestep this:
"Sorry, I don't give personal information like that out, but would love to have fun and RP!"
(^COPY/PASTE THAT. BOOKMARK THIS)
SIDEBAR: I have had dozens of conversations with various MSB personalities, both popular and reviled, who have said that they're going to start using this method. So always be nice, because when you use this above script, you could very well be some kind of reviled MSB villain OR a super popular person who just wants to RP in peace.
SIDEBAR 2: The above statement may or may not be true. But it could be. The person who says this may be your friend and an excellent RPer!!! Everyone who uses this method could be anyone.
SIDEBAR 3: Fact: The majority of people who have told me that they're going to start doing this are the nice ones.
STEP 4: Don't be an asshole. Be nice! You're there for RP and wanna be a part of a collective of RPers! Protect your escape identity by being what everyone wants: a low-drama and fun person to write scenes with who doesn't creep on people.
Disclaimer: This was written by one of the 4 people who utilize this account for posting purposes. Or I have MPD. Or I don't. Or I might! Or I'm actually the person you think is Ghost. Or I'm not. Or I'm ghost's SO. Or I lost my cell phone and this was written by the guy down the street at the Circle K who looks like an Iranian Steve Harvey.
Have a nice day. This is my one and only post in this thread. Do what you will.
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@Ghost said in How to Escape the OOC Game:
Disclaimer: This was written by one of the 4 people who utilize this account for posting purposes. Or I have MPD. Or I don't. Or I might! Or I'm actually the person you think is Ghost. Or I'm not. Or I'm ghost's SO. Or I lost my cell phone and this was written by the guy down the street at the Circle K who looks like an Iranian Steve Harvey.
2sp00ky4m3!!
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@Ghost One of the main reasons MSB exists is to create a persistent identity for people to associate with and hopefully create lasting relationships independent of transient things like characters on individual games.
So boo.
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There's a big issue:
Humans crave connection.
A large part of why many of us are in this hobby as much / as long as we are is that circumstances keep us from being able to connect IRL as much as we'd like. Be it health issues, anxiety, or even schedule (look at people on 2nd or 3rd shifts where the world caters to 1st shift). This hobby provides a way to connect.
Your method essentially negates that connection and puts up a wall that says 'no, you cannot know me.'
I believe you yourself would fumble after a while. All it'd take is a conversation or a person really into horror movies and you'd want to start to chatter your head off also. Remaining the distanced, stand-offish person who gives nothing of themselves only works to an extent. And that extent is: people stop interacting with you in return. Because you're weird. You're sterile. You're suspect. You feel wrong and awkward and untrustworthy.
It may seem a bright and gleaming idea in theory and a good way to hide from the mean and terrible people that have hurt you (general 'you') in the past or might hurt you (general 'you') in the future, but... I think it's just a way to feel isolated.
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@Auspice said in How to Escape the OOC Game:
Remaining the distanced, stand-offish person who gives nothing of themselves only works to an extent. And that extent is: people stop interacting with you in return. Because you're weird. You're sterile. You're suspect. You feel wrong and awkward and untrustworthy.
People interact with me a lot, but I don't really give much of myself. In my 20+ years, I can count on my hand the number of people who actually know me, and I'm happy about that. (I consider Sunny the person I've known the longest RL (what is it, like, nearly 20 years?) from here, and Caryatid as the closest.)
As Arkandel said, I am, and likely will always be, just Ganymede here and abroad. And I'm fine with that. I don't Skype, I don't chat over the phone, and I don't like sharing very personal parts of my life. Sure, I do sometimes, but not enough that people casually remember me as a feline robot.
That aside, it was very nice to receive a compliment from a staffer who knew me only as Ganymede. And I sometimes get recognized as such.
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I like being able to connect with people I have played with in the past. It gives me opportunities to possibly form relationships for other characters on other games with people (not that I have had much a chance to play recently) that I otherwise wouldn't have a connection to.
There are people that I lost contact with over the years that I would love to be able to reconnect with, and I always hold out that sometime they might stumble upon this place and we might reconnect.
I also understand the desire for some people to have that type of connection be the last thing they want to do and respect their desire for anonymity. If they don't want to give up information about past characters, that is their choice and why would anyone want to try and force that issue?
There is room enough for both types (and anyone in between), so why does this have to be a thing?
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I don't hide my identity and I'm not going to. I can't even alt-hide. I don't have the attention span, frankly, and honestly I'm prepared to own my shit, y'know? If I said something that pissed you off here and that impacts how you interact with me on a game, that's fine. It's how reality works, actions have consequences.
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I'll admit it. There have been times, in the past, when I felt sorely tempted to just.. break away from everything. Go someplace new, possibly get lucky enough to stumble onto a place where nobody knew me, leave my old online persona with all its baggage and bullshit other people have attached to it, deservedly or otherwise, and just... play. Play, and relax, and have fun, without all the crap.
Trouble is, there is almost always someone who will recognize you. Whether it's your writing style, or character (game character) traits that are similar to those you've given your PCs in the past, or the hours you keep, or wiki page styling, or.. hell, even down to the way you type emoticons, or if your habit is to use < >s or * *s around mini-emotes, like <grins>.
There have also, from what I've heard in rumors past, been staffers who recognized IP addresses and -- whether with deliberate malicious intent or not -- let slide a person's real identity to someone. Who then shared it with someone else. And so on, and so on.
So no, it's not always a simple matter of "just leave the old you behind, and become someone new." And as much as there have been situations or people that I've needed to walk away from, there are others I genuinely cherish and would have enormous difficulty leaving behind.
Just my two cents.
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@Scorn I have had staffers from other games approach me unsolicited more than once over the years with IP addresses of 'offenders'
That shit is real weird. I know fellow staffers on fallcoast got 'pre banned' and couldn't even log into a game after some staffers quit and made their GOMO
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Anyone who has ever talked to me or played with me more than casually will recognize me in no longer than two hours. I have no ability to conceal my voice.
@Ganymede pretty sure it's longer than 20 at this point; Ashes was 2000, and Guilded Promises or w/e it was) was pre-Ashes.
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people will log into a new game claiming to be staff elsewhere to warn you about bad actors. people will always think people are some evil MU BOGEYMAN.
IDK. the way you get out of it is two fold. 1. Don't be so reprehensible to people that you are considered a danger to fake online society, and 2. try not to give a fuck
I've had someone unironically use the phrase 'your reputation damns you' about me before. It was hilarious.
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The important thing is that we establish that you are older than me.
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On the other hand there are those of us here who simply attract creepers through no fault of their own. Usually players of a female persuasion. I could see the case being made that they'd want the chance to just play somewhere in peace and anonymity could provide them the chance to do so.
Also: Anyone who's fucked up big time but wants a fresh start should be entitled to one. Hey, there's nothing wrong with that either.
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@Arkandel said in How to Escape the OOC Game:
On the other hand there are those of us here who simply attract creepers through no fault of their own. Usually players of a female persuasion. I could see the case being made that they'd want the chance to just play somewhere in peace and anonymity could provide them the chance to do so.
sure. but there ARE other ways to dissuade creepers. I mean, it's all imperfect; this sucks.
Also: Anyone who's fucked up big time but wants a fresh start should be entitled to one. Hey, there's nothing wrong with that either.
I AGREE. I have long said if someone with a horrible rep or a ban or whatever disguises themselves and ACTUALLY manages to change their behavior so much that no one suspects who they are and what they did? Great! That's exactly what was wanted all along. Don't do the things that make people super uncomfortable, don't be a miserable asshole, no one will know! EVERYONE WINS.
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@Arkandel said in How to Escape the OOC Game:
Also: Anyone who's fucked up big time but wants a fresh start should be entitled to one. Hey, there's nothing wrong with that either.
...there are absolutely limits to this.
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Everyone is terrible and everything is bad.
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It's the "and actually manages to change their behaviour" part that most of our repeat offenders have problems with. I wouldn't have an issue with someone returning incognito if they'd actually changed their ways, I'm willing to assume that most people that do this have changed and are no longer a problem. But the more... pervasive ones we all know and love seem incapable of change.
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I suggest not giving the impression that 'change your name, change your face, sneak in past a ban' is a good idea. Even if behavior is changed, it's better to go forth and be better somewhere they did not specifically tell you you aren't welcome because of things that you did previously. Because even if you changed, the people you did things to may still be there, and they deserve to feel safe.
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Part of being better is recognition of past errors and how they harmed people, which is often coupled with 'leave them alone'.