Random Thoughts
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I couldn't think of any other thread to put this in. Maybe you have thoughts like this, too. This might as well be called 'shower thoughts.'
... guys, what do centaurs do with their hands during sex? I'm going to guess someone here has TS'd centaur sex and has had to deal with this conundrum.
Help me out. I'm tired and this has me flummoxed. (Or just chime in to laugh at me a lot for the weird places my brain goes when I'm sleepy.)
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The answer is:
Whatever they damn well want.
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I guess it depends on who they’re fucking (can you tell I mostly play WoD). If it’s not another centaur then they probably need to hold the sling that helps the more human person stick in the correct place without anyone throwing out their back (can you tell I’m old). If it’s another centaur then you need them for balance so that they don’t have even more of the falling off/imbalance problem that a lot of horses have, which I would assume would be even worse with a creature super awkwardly top heavy (yay Animal Science major. I’ve seen more animal species fuck and jerked off more different kinds of animals for the purpose of semen collection than most people want to know. Large quadrupeds like horses, cattle, and hogs falling off of things because they’re super awkward is totally a thing.)
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@mietze said in Random Thoughts:
I guess it depends on who they’re fucking (can you tell I mostly play WoD). If it’s not another centaur then they probably need to hold the sling that helps the more human person stick in the correct place without anyone throwing out their back (can you tell I’m old). If it’s another centaur then you need them for balance so that they don’t have even more of the falling off/imbalance problem that a lot of horses have, which I would assume would be even worse with a creature super awkwardly top heavy (yay Animal Science major. I’ve seen more animal species fuck and jerked off more different kinds of animals for the purpose of semen collection than most people want to know. Large quadrupeds like horses, cattle, and hogs falling off of things because they’re super awkward is totally a thing.)
I honestly never considered how much a problem horses would have staying balanced. I just sort of figured evolution would've gotten them where they needed to go. >.>
But I mean, looking at photos of centaurs (as if they were a for real thing), the positioning to even grab hold of something to stay balanced would be awkward af.
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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I'm sure someone could investigate this quite efficiently on Shang.
For science.
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What’s hair for if not a handle during the sexxors.
And no, domestic animals commonly have very comical problems because of other characteristics we breed into them. You can have a mare tied and hobbled and a stallion will often fall off more than a few times before he gets it right.
Though frankly evolution hasn’t done other wild species much better either, in some cases.
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@mietze said in Random Thoughts:
What’s hair for if not a handle during the sexxors.
Now I'm imagining centaur stylists.
"Honey, you don't want to cut your hair that short. What is your partner gonna hold onto?!"
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In the case of inter species intercourses, I mean obviously it can be done (here’s looking at you anal/intestinal perforation dude that led to bestiality finally becomeing a felony in WA!) but there are often complications. Most pictures I’ve seen don’t have a male centaur’s beefdart swinging around like a human’s so I can only assume it’s closer to horse physiology. Which means Stallion Stan is a minute man as well as having poor aim.
That could be outrageously fun to ruin someone’s hot fantasy sex scene for them.
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There’s always ears or just squishing them against the barn door or fence.
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No darling, we’re not a stable training horses for that kind of Big Lick, those rings in the ceiling there are for the Big Dick.
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@mietze said in Random Thoughts:
(here’s looking at you anal/intestinal perforation dude that led to bestiality finally becomeing a felony in WA!)
Ahh, good ol' Mr Hands.
@mietze said in Random Thoughts:
That could be outrageously fun to ruin someone’s hot fantasy sex scene for them.
I guess we're back to someone needing to go to Shang for science like @kitteh said.
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I am choosing not to laugh.
I am choosing to judge.
Not, like, you know, a lot.
But its never going away, now, this whole, 'What do centaurs do with their hands during sex?'
You'll talk about medical health care one day, and I'll be all like, thinking: centaur hands during sex.
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@auspice This really explains a lot of why they show a lot of centaurs wearing those twin braid hairstyles all of a sudden...
ETA: This conversation == Infinitely more entertaining than the eternal 'do vampires have sex and why' discussion. (PLEASE NOBODY START THAT ONE HERE.)
Oh fucking well.
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@surreality said in Random Thoughts:
ETA: This conversation == Infinitely more entertaining than the eternal 'do vampires have sex and why' discussion. (PLEASE NOBODY START THAT ONE HERE.)
Now here for me the big question has always been not do they but can they, and if they can, do they want to, and if they want to, why ...
Holy fuck I've officially thought about vampire sex so much over my staffing history its automatic. I can't stop it. Please wait. Drinking large gulp of bourbon.
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@surreality said in Random Thoughts:
@auspice This really explains a lot of why they show a lot of centaurs wearing those twin braid hairstyles all of a sudden...
ETA: This conversation == Infinitely more entertaining than the eternal 'do vampires have sex and why' discussion. (PLEASE NOBODY START THAT ONE HERE.)
Well you see When a Big Daddy Vampire Loves a Cute Young Thang Ghoul a little too much he gets excited...
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@ixokai @Templari NOOOO! NOT THE VAMPIRE SEX CONVERSATION!!!
...the real question is this: when vampires MU*, do they write lots of boredom TS in their downtime? Like, just chillin' in the haven, waitin' for the sun to go down, ain't got nothin' better to do...
Oh fucking well.
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Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@surreality Yes. As it helps keep up their... circulation.
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@auspice Haaa, that is one of my favorites.
