How do *you* make social scenes fun and enjoyable?

[Carma]

This post is deleted!

[mietze]

First I try to read the room if I am joining a scene in progress Are people RPing actively? Perhaps it isn't the time then to run in and flip tables or be disruptive in the scene bc I think it seems a little boring.

Second, I try to play off what other folks there are doing in a way that doesn't mean they have to go out of their way to interact with me. Paying attention to other people's poses seems to be a shock to many people and I tend to get positive results from it.

Third, making sure I have realistic expectations ooc. If I'm having a down day or feeling strongly like no one will like my RP or I would be super disappointed if nothing clicked then for me personally that is a day usually when I will /not/ go out to trawl for random RP. If I am super grumpy and am going to be very annoyed at grammatical errors or people not always reading my poses thoroughly (and I'm not in the mood to find the humor in it) then that also probably isn't a great day to go rando just because I am not in a space to enjoy things and people in a less controlled/known environment and that's not really fair to anyone and is setting me up to feel aggravated.

If there's no scenes in progress and I am soliciting for new RP then I try to have a couple of scenarios and places to suggest specifically to folks on the seeking RP channel or when/if they respond to a page. That way I can pick stuff I enjoy! If it is a blue moon and the other person has ideas at the ready that is honestly so rare that it is a treat!

And importantly to either type of social rp, I always have an exit plan oocly. How long I will stay to give things a chance to spark. How I will jump out or hopefully end something in a graceful and positive way once things have run their course.

I find ending scenes gracefully to be the hardest and something I'm working on.

But honestly, the single best predictor of being able to have fun and enjoy scenes for me personally is being sure to manage my expectations, make sure that I'm in a good place to /be/ a good RP partner, and to try to have a list of ideas/things I can springboard off of that are interesting and fun for me to play as well as things that can be incorporated into existing scenes without being overly disruptive (though sometimes people will give the go ahead to shake things up, which can be fun too, I've learned to be careful about doing that as an introduction.)

[Duntada]

I am a bit in the mindset of being the sacrificial lamb as well.

Maybe a bit telling about the characters I have played but I have very much done things like have my character walk into an art gallery armed with water balloons and such with every intention of doing it so the owner can beat my ass to protect their stuff. Sometimes the scene needs someone to just make a bone headed move so we all have something to laugh about.

I have also taken on the habit of making characters with high empathy for reading what people like, even if I am making a character to be an antagonist character because it gives me an excuse to try and pick up on what players are interested in that scene by rolling to see what the character is paying the most attention to. The players themselves are also probably the most interested in that topic at the moment as well and I can then make it the topic of interaction at the time. It feels a little manipulating at times, but that's not always bad right?

[Lotherio]

For a contribution to the topic other than the article shared in the last thread, like @mietze I'll try to get a read to get myself into a scene and not expect or hope to be drawn in with attention to myself.

One thing I do more often than not is see what the topic is and make an opinion that mostly disagrees with the social topic at hand. If they're planning a gardening event on X street, I'll make a reason not to go there and try Y street for that event. If they think the one team should win the super bowl while planning a super bowl party, I pick the other team. If they think the city needs to clean up the streets, I'll say there are non-profits for that and having the city make a storm wash unit costs money while detracting from the charitable work of others.

Just change to fit theme, charitable event planning could be L&L folks deciding to send aid to House of John who is near the front of the war, I'll go with House of Tim is a more important point.

Better I'll see what theme is and work in something that doesn't fit for the purpose of social. Like a game focused on war, I'll make the pacifist. Not to be an argumentative jerk who yells at the war efforts, but to philosophically discuss why economy would be better without the war or something.

[Pyrephox]

Trying to think back to social scenes I've really enjoyed -

1. Use the setting and environment. A scene that's grounded in something that's true for the game is a lot more fun to me than a scene that could happen anywhere. This includes incidental things like weather and NPC saturation/diversity.

2. Use NPCs. Now, this doesn't mean forcing other players to just play with NPCs and never even speak to your character (I've had a scene like this on a game, and it was BAFFLING), but a couple of colorful NPCs can give diverse PCs an immediate 'hook' to react to, and bond over.

3. Have things happen. This doesn't mean have STUPID things happen, but having a scene where something is happening outside of 'PCs meet and talk' adds flavor, depth, and hooks for people. A scene at a boxing match is usually more exciting than a scene sitting on a bench in an empty park. Fender-benders, bad minstrels, sudden weather changes, whatever.

4. Be passionate or strong-minded. I don't mean be pointlessly aggressive and escalate every situation to murder. But looking back, the most fun my social scenes have been were when PCs had strong opinions that they didn't immediately roll over on, or had personalities that /sparked/ on one another in exciting ways - which means that the PCs had to have personalities to spark with. Where social scenes feel like pulling teeth is almost always when I'm with a PC who just...has no real opinions about anything, wants to smooth out all disagreements, and is very live and let live to the point where it's like they're a frictionless sphere. Give me something! Be human!

[SquirrelTalk]

In my experience, the broadly defined 'social scenes' work best when they incorporate/reflect on/build on current goings on, plots, and relationships that are developing, or that people have been affected by. I've never really been able to overcome the awkwardness of just bumping into someone my character doesn't know somewhere without a OOC plan for what comes of it.

[Carma]

This post is deleted!

[L. B. Heuschkel]

I always have a purpose for a social scene -- whether it's coffee shop or bumping into people at the grocer, or just crossing paths on the marina. The purpose does not have to be complex or deep; a lot of the time it is simply 'meet this new person' or 'drop some plot info I got yesterday on others so they have it too'.

It gives me direction, though. I like to start with an opener of some kind that involves the game's location and theme: Is it the local Blueberry Festival (why, yes, last night in fact it was!), is it a cold and rainy morning where my character is dripping on the carpet while he waits in line, is there something local and unique to this setting to engage with?

And then I try to steer the conversation towards whatever it is I am trying to do -- unless it's already going somewhere else, in which case I just hop along for the ride.

I feel very uncomfortable if I have nothing and no particular reason to be there. But it's okay for that reason to get drowned out because somebody else had something more exciting. The main issue for me is to remember that the point of these scenes is to live every day life, but also to network and make information spread to those who weren't there when the thing happened.

[Seraphim73]

@l-b-heuschkel Totally agree on the desire to have a purpose for a "purely social scene," as well as having something that explicitly links the scene to the setting. I do think it's nice to sometimes just have social scenes purely for the purpose of resetting the status quo. Sure, you can talk about all the big stuff that happened since the last time you got a chance to sit down, but to me, the purpose of these scenes is just to establish the new normal -- how has the relationship between these characters changed because of what's happened to them, and how can they find a good balance (even if it's a tenuous one) that can be upset again by the next big events (and "upset" can mean "put right" if the last big events left the characters on the outs).

Without these quiet beats between the big things that happen to characters, I feel like the big things lose their impact and they become the status quo, which isn't desirable (unless you're playing something like the 33 episode of BSG, you don't want -- come to think of it, even that episode had some moments of resetting status quo in the midst of it).

[L. B. Heuschkel]

@seraphim73 There is absolutely nothing wrong with a social 'coffee shop' style scene where a number of people just happen to occupy the same space. It's a good opportunity to spread information around and catch up on what changed after the last big drama. Keep one another up to speed on IC gossip, warn each other about the big bad in the woods, and crack jokes.

I still want to go in there with that specific purpose, though. But that's also all it does take -- to go in, knowing that you're doing a kind of catch-us-up scene. Where it fails for me is just going in, with no purpose or agenda. Because that places the onus on the other person to make sure there is something to talk about or do -- and the other player is not always capable of that. I don't want to waste their time or mine, so I always try to have a backup plan.

[Arkandel]

The way I see it, social scenes are a force multiplier. They enhance everything else; metaplot, factions, character progression, PrPs... as a game-runner you ideally want all of those things to branch off like crazy onto your grid, spawning a wider net of interactions than you can yourself arrange.

Without that your PrP is an one-off; it lives in a ST/GM's presence and effectively ceases to exist when they are done.

The key to make these scenes fun and enjoyable though is to provide the kindling. Without that they are sterile; you can only meet so many times with Bob to feed him pieces off your background story. But what if you tell Bob about the thing that happened at the hospital the other night? Or you ask him if he can help your quirky packmate with getting his cat back from his evil ex?

In other words, as long as your MUSH is semi-active and not a sandbox social scenes will be fun and enjoyable. They just need fuel. And if they don't, you have a bigger problem to fix anyway.

[Lotherio]

@arkandel said in How do *you* make social scenes fun and enjoyable?:

Without that they are sterile; you can only meet so many times with Bob to feed him pieces off your background story.

I agree with everything @Arkandel said but wanted to spring off this background story bit.

Whether its bullet point or longer, give a few nuggets in your BG. Part of that RP sparkle, your BG is another reason to give feeders to others to want to play with you. I don't like fully flushed out BGs but something to use for RP fodder.

Can be small, Joe's lost his brother to traumatic thing and doesn't like water.

Anything, but then inversely, don't just drop that in the first RP social moment, I'm afraid of water and sometimes down cause I lost my brother to traumatic thing when I was young. Build it up, one time at the beach, look at the water longingly but don't go any closer than 20 meters. That one time near the YMCA pool, avoid getting close to the water and shy away from it, bow out saying you need a moment. Give it time to spark someone else to eventually say 'why don't you like water' or whatever.

[Herja]

Be generous in poses. Give your partner(s) something to react to, be it a piece of compelling dialogue or some sort of non-verbal cue that they can then pick up and run with. I don't mean something that results in them merely reacting to your PC, but something that gives them something to build on in their pose. There should never be a point where the other person, if they are semi-creative and a decent writer, doesn't know how to continue the conversation. Leave openings. Let other people feel important in the scene. Don't center everything on just your character.

[Sunny]

Ask other characters about things that their characters are clearly into. Their history. Their job. Whatever. If I as player pick up on the character having a gimmick, I lean into that.

TRY to every pose a- react to something directly in their pose, by reference, and b- give them something to react to, or a not-subtle place for the conversation to go, or a lead of some sort.

Drop the pencil. If I have to make my character look stupid to get interaction going, fine.

These are what I find to be the building blocks for a successful social scene. The rest of it is pretty much limitlessly negotiable.

[Pyrephox]

@sunny Man, all of that. People are SO HAPPY to be able to do 'their character's thing'. If you give a character a chance to do the thing the player built them to do, or show interest in the character's Thing, you will see a character COME TO LIFE so many times.

Not always - I've definitely had those moments where I do everything to try and draw a character in based on the hooks they've written for that character and get nada. But those are a minority. Usually, you get the best RP from other people when you show even the slightest interest in them as characters.

[Kestrel]

Generally, to be honest, I don't. I don't feel the need to force a scene to be enjoyable if I don't think it will be; I just sit it out.

I find that these days my motivation to RP is somewhat lower than it used to be, because I'm always thinking on what else I could be doing with that time, so this scene better be good and worth it. I'm not gonna show up unless I think it'll be really cool and I'm genuinely excited to be there. Never out of a sense of obligation, never just to be polite, never to spare someone's feelings because they asked nicely, never just because there's nothing else to do. If I'm sitting here thinking about how to make something that doesn't seem fun be a bit funner, that's a sign I shouldn't be doing it.

I would instead suggest that when trying to come up with ways to initiate scenes with new people, the same rule applies to RP as it does to dating: find something to do. @L-B-Heuschkel's advice I feel is similar to this, as is the article linked by @Carma. For instance instead of starting/joining a bar scene, I'd be much more enthused to suggest we meet for a spar, or a secret recon mission spying on vNPCs, or that we got pulled into a brawl. Or if I am gonna join a bar scene I'll come up with a reason to be there that isn't just 'hang out and meet new people'; something like 'I'm here to ask questions about the missing person I just made up, here's a photo and the scary details of where they were last seen.'

[krmbm]

@kestrel said in How do *you* make social scenes fun and enjoyable?:

Generally, to be honest, I don't. I don't feel the need to force a scene to be enjoyable if I don't think it will be; I just sit it out.

I was starting to feel like the only one.

When I was younger and had FOMO, I would suffer through them just so I didn't omg get left out!!!

Nowadays? Enh. I make social scenes fun and enjoyable by not showing up and ruining them.