@Macha said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Cupcake My therapist worries because I cling to the same humor/deflection even when I'm talking about the dark things. That I deliver it all logically.
Then, at the end of the session today, she remarked that it might be a good thing, right now. I might need it to cling to. So something feels normal. I'm just such a mess, right now.
This is something my own therapist has mentioned to me as well. I've been trained in left-brain arts since I was a child, because I always focused on math and sciences (especially computer science, when younger) and going into adulthood I still feel the need to try to analyze everything, including emotions and responses, just to see if there is a rational source. The closest I've come to really expressing myself would probably be MU*ing with the occasional mini writing projects I give myself (that I somehow never finish).
That said, in early August I had a bit of a meltdown and I've been kind of freaking out about the disruption in the background, and one thing that I too have been told is to try and stick to what is normal for you. We have a bit of a subconscious need for normalcy, and if rational expression is what you do, stick with it. Heal first, always.