@Auspice said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
@Sparks said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
So in a pinch, remind Aunt Karen that if she doesn't like the way you're planning things, you could always just elope?
Seriously. I wish I had.
My first mistake back when I got married was telling family I was getting married. I wanted to just go and see a judge. And I told them this. So 'Well, shouldn't your parents at least be there?' became 'But what about your siblings?' and '...you grandparents?' and eventually every extended relative under the sun.
^ We sooooooooort of are? This is what she's complaining about. We're going to City Hall and getting married by a judge. The building is gorgeous, but old, so the rooms are small. You're only allowed eight guests in chambers. So that's my parents, his parents, his brother, and his brother's long-term partner. Probably also my two closest friends, who are practically like sisters. City Hall here only does weddings on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
I assumed that outside of his immediate family, none of our Midwest/Rust Belt relatives would want to take three days off of work to drive 9-12 hours to come to a 15 minutes ceremony on some random Thursday afternoon and go to dinner after.
I also assumed that this would likely be disappointing for our extended families, so agreed to let his parents throw us a big semi-catered, semi-potluck, low-key bash in their backyard six months later. Everyone gets to see us in our fancy clothes (which I feel less stupid spending money if I get to wear more than once), get drunk on someone else's dime, eat cake, have some photos snapped, and generally celebrate with the added bonus of the two introverts not having to stand in front of ~200 people being stared at while they talk about their feelings.
UNACCEPTABLE.
Apparently I'm now supposed to explain to her what sort of place I'm getting married in that has such a policy and why and, after peppering me with questions, she wants to 'take it to private chat' so we can discuss it.
Be glad we're doing anything for extended family at all. I live in a state where you don't even need to have an officiant if you pay an extra $10, so we could've just filed the paperwork and never even told anyone except the IRS if I'd been able to convince the boy.
Also, thank you for the well wishes and (sincere) marriage advice. Keep 'em coming. I'm going to need them to make it through October without murdering any relatives. The Knot really should add a section for "bride and groom's coping booze" in the budgeting tool.