RL Anger

[Ganymede]

@derp

I know you're venting. This is not meant to belittle how you feel.

Have you thought about taking your business elsewhere? Because I over-drafted hard with my bank and was not charged because they know I have money, but the timing was poor.

Smart banks know that waiving overdraft fees will keep and attract clients.

[Derp]

@ganymede

It's very much on my agenda, yes. There are some benefits to this particular bank. Namely that they have ATM's like -- everywhere. Everywhere. Which is occasionally useful. The other banks I have as current options require a bit more forethought and planning to avoid other fees.

But when I talked to the banker lady, she said that I wasn't eligible to have any of the fees covered because I did have to legitimately overdraft at the beginning of the year when I had to move out of my old place in a hurry, which ate all the savings I had and then some, because I didn't feel comfortable in a house with a dude that pulled a gun on me, quelle surprise.

So she's all 'because we only charged you fifty dollars instead of a hundred and fifty dollars back in April you are not eligible to have us fix our own fuckup until the end of November, sorry'.

Finding another bank is definitely on the agenda.

[Ganymede]

@derp

I hope you find one.

Feel free to put up a GoFundMe if you want to here as well because no one should have to fucking starve because of their fucking bank, that's just fucked up.

Really fucked up, dude.

[Derp]

@ganymede

I'll be alright. I won't starve. I have been poor most of my life, I can make food do amazing things on a very small budget. I can go staple shopping, and get brake pads, and probably have enough left in the bank that they'll cover a rent check.

I'm mostly just mad. Mad that we pretty much have to use banks, and they have this ridiculous amount of power. Mad that i work in a job that people used to fight for, that now doesn't even pay competitively for beginners, and I have plenty of experience and academic cred. Mad that, because of that job, I can't even get a second job because of the moonlighting rules at the first job -- and they know because everyone reports income to them, so unless I find something super-duper under the table, I am stuck at a single income, or take risks out in the private sector legal economy which is -- kinda iffy right now, and largely full of areas I have zero experience in, like real estate.

I'm just mad that all of this institutional nonsense is so hard to work around. And I needed to vent about it.

PSA, kids: It doesn't get better if you go get an education. It just gets more expensive and complicated, with more paperwork.

[Ganymede]

@derp said in RL Anger:

Mad that, because of that job, I can't even get a second job because of the moonlighting rules at the first job -- and they know because everyone reports income to them, so unless I find something super-duper under the table, I am stuck at a single income, or take risks out in the private sector legal economy which is -- kinda iffy right now, and largely full of areas I have zero experience in, like real estate.

If you happen to be in an area with lots of people, think about inquiring at your local bar to see if they need a bar-back or a door-person. 'Round here, they are kind of desperate -- to the point where I now regularly moonlight as a door-person.

Sweet gig, too, at a local karaoke joint. Not only do I get to be put into rotation, but I also get my drinks comp'd and walk out with a cool $60 under the table. Which is not bad for 4 hours of work.

Sunday mornings sort of suck, but they were going to suck regardless.

[Aria]

@derp Dude, if you need $50 for groceries, don't even worry about paying me back. Just send me your Venmo. It's fine.

[Derp]

@aria

Lol, I appreciate it! I dunno. Maybe I'll take a full inventory of how much this is gonna set me back and start a gofundme or something. It just hurts me in the pride, because I feel like there are people that need it worse than me, and all of this is because of stupid first world problem bullshit.

[reimesu]

@derp Yeah, but some of us have known you for a while and would like to be able to throw five or ten bucks your way, because you exist and make people happy.

Shit, I feel like I owe you just for introducing me to Pomplamoose.

[Aria]

@derp Look, man. At one point I had a friend from these games cover a pretty expensive emergency vet bill and only let me pay, like... two-thirds? three-quarters? something like that back.

I've also helped people on these boards and these games pay for groceries and rent and broken computers and gas bills and moving expenses before.

Shit happens. Sometimes it's for stupid reasons, sometimes it's for things beyond our control, sometimes it's because we messed up. But sooner or later it happens to everyone, and I like to think we all end up even-steven eventually.

[Derp]

@reimesu said in RL Anger:

Pomplamoose

Look, introducing people to the glory of Pomplamoose is just basic human decency, and don't you let anyone ever tell you otherwise.

[Derp]

Alright. I did the thing.

After doing the math and figuring out how much this is actually setting me back and how incredibly painful this can be for the next few weeks -- I took the plunge and made a GoFundMe, with a realistic amount based on the new fees and expenses that will come from this one.

https://gofund.me/d4b1da0f

Apparently I wrote a novel in the blurb part just -- explaining how this has been a shit year and how much it has sucked trying to get caught up. GFM requires you to click 'Read More' like eight times. So if you want the whole thing all at once, here goes:

***=Long and Stuff***

click to show

Hi! I'm Daz. Most of the people reading this probably know me a little better as Derp, or Ryker, from various online communities.

And it's been a rough year.

Normally I try to avoid asking for help. I'm pretty good at finding clever ways to re-arrange things, make sure that things smooth themselves out over time. But at the beginning of the year, I was face with an unexpected, very necessary long-distance move. It wasn't really optional. It was a matter of personal safety, both physically and psychologically. But it completely wiped out what savings I had managed to build up to that point.

The next few months were spent managing the realities of trying to build a life in a far more expensive city while living paycheck to paycheck. I managed to stay ahead of most of the expenses, or at least very carefully juggled which ones I could afford to let get behind a bit. The Calculus of Being a Single Human Adult Renter.

And for the most part, I was starting to get caught back up a bit. I was less than $200 behind, after being almost $1500 in debt after the move. After this check, everything was starting to look up! I even had enough to take the dog to the vet for a sudden eye infection without taking the bank account into the negative! (It might have had less than ten dollars, but still not in the negative!)

And I deferred payment on a few bills for about a week and a half, just waiting on my next paycheck to hit, because I figured that the $25 or so it would cost me in late fees was a cost that I could safely absorb.

Imagine my surprise when I wake up to find out that the bank paid all of those bills on the day I got paid -- except that they paid them before they processed my paycheck, and charged an overdraft fee on each and every one of them. Five transactions in all. Five overdraft fees. Almost two hundred dollars in unexpected charges that my bank, being the mega-corporation that they are, refuses to reimburse. Because they know they're basically ubiquitous, so it doesn't matter if they lose one customer. They have millions of others, and tons of small banks are basically owned by them anyway.

So now I'm back to the part where I have rent coming up, and not enough money to cover it due to these unexpected extra expenses, plus the extra $75 that it's going to tack onto the rent (because it'll be late) and the additional extra overdraft fee that the bank will surely charge for not having enough to cover the expenses.

And that's before gas, or food, or laundry, or any other adult expenditure.

I, like many of you, hate asking for help. But the logical part of me knows that, at this point, we're getting into territory where getting caught up is going to take a lot of effort, and a lot of sacrifices, and a lot of tempting fate that could end up making things even worse. Especially as I've largely been tempting fate for the better part of a year to just get caught up to where I am.

So. I'm asking for help. Because I've been doing this awhile now, and I've made sacrifices, and honestly -- I'm tired. And feeling a little defeated, at this point. Unexpected things are going to keep happening, and there's no way to tell ahead of time if they're going to be the kind of things that I can bounce back from easily, or if they're going to knock me further down the slope I just climbed, ever so slowly.

I don't expect anyone to contribute anything they don't have, or don't feel comfortable sacrificing. PLEASE take care of your own needs first, and only contribute if you really, truly are in a place that you can do so. But if you have anything that you could spare, the fundraiser amount puts me exactly even after rent is paid, groceries are purchased (budgeted for about $50), I get enough gas in the truck to get to work for the next two weeks, and the last few of the remaining bills are caught up, which puts me in a position to actually be able to start saving money again. And that would be a huge stress burden off of me.

Thank you in advance for any assistance you can provide. I really believe that we choose our own families, and the people reading this are almost assuredly part of the family I've chosen for myself. One of these days, I'll be in a position to help one of you, too. And you bet that I'll have your back when you need it, like you always have mine, no matter how rough life gets.

For those skipping that part -- the TL;DR is that not only do I have to account for the 200, I have to account for the 75 that will get added onto the rent for it, as well as all the other basic adulting charges, and realistically -- I could use some help. Even if I hate that I need help, and hate asking for it more. There's just too much that can go wrong to keep gambling on me being able to catch up before the next majorly expensive thing.

Any help you can offer is appreciated.

[Meg]

@derp done. good luck.

(this post counts as my selfish 'look at how good a person i am' reward for donating. but look at me guys! so great, for being given lucky breaks in life and being born upper middle class.)

[Derp]

@meg

I appreciate the hell out of all of you. Like -- I really, really do. I'm kind of floored by how this thing has taken off so far. It's -- just incredibly humbling.

Thank you so much. Each and every one of you. If you guys ever need anything at all, and I can provide it, please let me know. I'll do whatever I can.

[Aria]

@derp said in RL Anger:

@meg

I appreciate the hell out of all of you. Like -- I really, really do. I'm kind of floored by how this thing has taken off so far. It's -- just incredibly humbling.

Thank you so much. Each and every one of you. If you guys ever need anything at all, and I can provide it, please let me know. I'll do whatever I can.

Dude, you were already at the 50% mark when I made my donation this morning. You're gonna be fine. ^_^

(But also legit fuck your bank still.)

[Derp]

@aria said in RL Anger:

(But also legit fuck your bank still.)

The first thing I did this morning was go set up an account with another bank.

I'm 100% on board with 'fuck those guys' at this point.

[Sunny]

@derp

Thanks for having the courage to let us help. I know it's really hard. Much appreciated!

[silverfox]

@Derp

You've already set up an account but 110% I suggest a credit union. Especially one as a part of an association that 'shares' ATMs. I started banking with a Denver credit union when I was 16 (it was my parent's) and kept it when I moved to Utah, and then Arizona. They had associations with other credit unions (It's called CO-OP) so that if you used a co-op atm the fees were waved. I could make deposits to my Denver bank, as well as with draws. Provo alone had 97 different ATMs in the co-op, so getting to one was never an issue.

So... yes. I'm a credit union flag waver. >.>

[Derp]

@silverfox said in RL Anger:

You've already set up an account but 110% I suggest a credit union.

I did, in fact, go with a credit union. Great minds!

[silverfox]

@derp

[Tinuviel]

THERE. I PAID YOU MONEY. NOW YOU MUST BE NICE TO ME.