Aug 17, 2017, 6:10 PM

@faraday First... I really wish people would google that case before citing it as an example of absurdity. The warning on the linked image in this article is not for the lulz. https://www.2keller.com/library/the-mcdonalds-hot-coffee-lawsuit-do-you-know-what-really-happened-.cfm (There's a whole movie about this.)

The games you've run, from what I gather, don't often tread into triggery territory in the ways many people think of it. I don't recall if you mentioned running, or playing on, the one historical war game set in one of the world wars or not -- but that would be the closest I could think of from the games I've heard you mention that might warrant a tag here or there -- mostly because we do have a lot of active duty military in the hobby and there are some folks who may want a heads up if today's plot involves something along the lines of a gas attack or land mines (since there are people who we play with who have been through these things, or the very real threat of them, within the last decade). For instance, I would be inclined to mention, 'hey, tonight's GM'd scene involves a raid and rescue mission in a concentration camp; be advised' on a WWII game -- and I do not consider this in the least bit unreasonable to give players a heads-up about so they can self-police to their sensitivities. I'm not talking about labeling for every possible phobia or personal dislike here, but common extremes.

@Lisse24 I always figure it's best to have a general category for a pref -- and space for people to write what they want, rather than a checklist. So people could write whatever they wanted, at whatever length or level of detail they wanted. I've seen a lot of 'maybe, page and ask' on Shang, for instance, in +kinks, on things that people sometimes like but only under very specific circumstances they don't want to advertise, or if it's something that's great when they're in the mood for it but it's no-nay-never on a normal day, and so on.

The non-confrontational part is kinda huge, too. Some people are awkward bringing things up -- but even more often, I've noticed that people are awkward at explaining something when they're put on the spot. More people are willing to say, 'hey, this is a bit uncool for me' than are really able to explain what exactly isn't working when they are in that moment of active discomfort. When someone can explain themselves in a calm, unchallenged, pressure-free state of mind, it's a lot easier. There's no potential pressure to explain quickly to not hold up a scene and maybe miss something or get tongue-tied and potentially run into a misunderstanding, there's a little less chance for someone to feel pressured to omit something just to 'go along' and not stir the pot, and so on. When something comes up in scene, something's already wrong. It may be very wrong. And while it's important for people to speak up, sometimes it really is easier to have that written down somewhere and point rather than try to explain oneself when you're already upset, and know you run the risk of upsetting the other person by interrupting or disrupting as an added pressure on top.