Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff
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@Derp I can't really give much advice on how to find a decent trainer -- the times that I have had one, I just went with whatever ones looked good on Yelp. However, I do wanna mention an alternative that I really loved -- a private pilates instructor.
I never really liked doing gym workouts. I never really liked being in a gym. But for a while, I was seeing a woman who had a private pilates studio. I'd see her twice a week and it was just me and her in home. She was a former dancer and very knowledgeable about the body. I have some back issues that I need to be careful about and she was able to tailor our sessions around that. And pilates is tooooough. It will make you strong.
I dunno how much you are looking to spend; private instruction is definitely not cheap. But compared to my experiences with personal trainers (which were fine!), I really got a lot more out of that.
I really should reach out to her again...
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@derp said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
See, that's the thing. I would -like- to focus on strength training because I have an injury that prevents me from doing high-impact cardio at my current level (ankle is too fucked to run right now but is stable and can easily bear steady, low-impact weight)
Yeah, for strength training that's a good idea.
My suggestion would be to still look for someone who knows what they are doing. Don't let them keep you on machines for long - junior PTs prefer them for a host of reasons - they are easier, catchier for the eye if you are a gym owner, and it's simply less work for them to let you crank out 10 reps on an incline machine than to teach you how to bench press. But the latter is by far a superior training tool.
You'll make mistakes either way. That's okay. Part of the fun is figuring out how you are fucking up and what to do about it.
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@derp said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Honestly? I have no idea what I'm doing. I don't know what's safe, or what realistic goals should be. Total noob in this area. It's a weakness that I would like to fix, because I'm not 20 anymore and it's starting to become an issue. But it was never an issue before, so I spent no time learning this, compared to other things that required my attention.
Under these circumstances, I would propose that your best trainer is a friend who knows what they're doing.
Working out has to be fun when you're starting out, I think. When I started, I was with my brother. I followed him around from machine to machine, and, in between his sets, he watched mine. We bonded over the sessions, and it really made it more of a social event. That helps block out that overriding message in your brain when you're on your own -- namely: it's just you now, bubba.
So, consider that.
I'd recommend going to a big, public place, like a LA Fitness or YMCA or whatnot. I have never gotten much out of smaller, trainer gyms. I've found that those trainers are really good, but there's an expectation that you can do some of the more basic things, whereas trainers at larger places are used to dealing with the elderly, the obese, etc. (Not to say that you are either of these, but that these trainers are used to dealing with folks who are just starting for the first time.)
If you've got an ankle injury, I'd suggest also thinking about mobility and flexibility goals. This will help you for strength training too. Here's a neat video of some of the stretches that I like before hitting the weights. It's also quick, so you could probably do these once or twice a day.
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Oh, since I forgot to mention this...
It's commonplace at the gym, right at first, to feel like you don't belong, or that people are watching/judging you. Some are more self conscious about these things than others, and it doesn't help to point out the vast majority of gym-goers don't give a shit about anyone else but themselves, or that the only shape they'll look at is their own in the mirror or maybe the cute person across the room (bouncing the image off of five mirrors first, of course).
What might help is that if you have company it mitigates that initial feeling a lot. A PT will establish you, a friend will help you feel like you're where you should be, and either way it just works out.
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I really, really, really hate when my anemia flares up.
Yes, I take a supplement.
Yes, I try to structure my diet to supplement further.But man I'm having really bad dehydration days lately. I'm thirsty more than hungry the past couple days. I'm already on fill #3 of my 32oz water bottle today. And I just feel like utter shit.
Reeeeeeally hope this doesn't ruin movie experience tonight.
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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Speaking of movies and health stuff:
David is coughing so much that we may need to do another hospital stay. Which means Star Wars will be delayed until after Christmas, since he has mandatory two week minimum stays.
Goddamit. Fuck C.F.
Racism isn't Tinkerbell. It doesn't need you to believe in it for it to exist.
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@derp said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Goddamit. Fuck C.F.
I am earnestly sorry to hear this.
Last year, around this time, my little girl was in the hospital for an upper respiratory infection. Actually, she was in the hospital because she could barely breathe, and her O2 saturation dropped below 90. This was because she had been infected by 6 different ailments. The funny part is that her twin brother had some other disease, which probably couldn't have infected her under the Burns Principle.
Nothing sucks worse than watching a 3 year old at a near-unconscious state because she cannot breathe. They had her on a constant flow of albuterol sulfate and concentrated O2. For 8 days.
My partner had to go to school. She failed a couple of exams, and had to re-take them. I had to go to work every day, then spend the night at the hospital. I lost 15 pounds during this time because I ate 1 meal a day.
I watched her every night. The sound of the respirator. I freaked out every time the vital monitor hiccupped. I saw Frozen eleventy-billion times (her favorite movie).
8 days.
And all you can do is watch. For the first two nights, it was through tears. For the rest, there was that feeling of guilt for not bringing her to hospital immediately, and for thinking, dammit, if she'd just stop coughing at night I could get some sleep.
8 days.
I feel you. Hard. But these are times that makes us men or women or whatever we are.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
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@ganymede said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Nothing sucks worse than watching a 3 year old at a near-unconscious state because she cannot breathe. They had her on a constant flow of albuterol sulfate and concentrated O2. For 8 days.
My three year old has a cold and keeps waking up at night to cough on and off for 20-45 minutes at a time.
I can barely deal with THAT. The sound of it makes my heart hurt and everything in me is frustrated that I can't magically fix it.
Which is to say, sympathies, and I'm sorry to hear it, too. I can't imagine.
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Why is it so hard to process having a bunch of people telling me I look beautiful/pretty? Like, near panic attack level feelings. It's a compliment. I should enjoy compliments, right?
"If you stand for nothing Burr, what will you fall for?"
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@cupcake said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Why is it so hard to process having a bunch of people telling me I look beautiful/pretty? Like, near panic attack level feelings. It's a compliment. I should enjoy compliments, right?
You should, but, you know, Matt Lauer.
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@cupcake said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Why is it so hard to process having a bunch of people telling me I look beautiful/pretty? Like, near panic attack level feelings. It's a compliment. I should enjoy compliments, right?
In my experience, the moment someone drops a compliment, I know the pressure is on. Act properly, maintain standard, etc. It's welcome, usually, but also exhausting.
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Huh.
Here, I'm thinking to myself: "Maybe when being honest, I should add on 'RELAX, THO'." But then that sounds dickish and self-important/-arrogant.
Jesus, sometimes you just want to pay someone a compliment without it causing stress and drama and hurt feelings. Those are the exact opposites of the wanted outcome.
Seriously. Sometimes you just look pretty and nice people want to pay that compliment because, you know, sharing smiles and happy.
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@rook said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Huh.
Here, I'm thinking to myself: "Maybe when being honest, I should add on 'RELAX, THO'." But then that sounds dickish and self-important/-arrogant.
Jesus, sometimes you just want to pay someone a compliment without it causing stress and drama and hurt feelings. Those are the exact opposites of the wanted outcome.
Seriously. Sometimes you just look pretty and nice people want to pay that compliment because, you know, sharing smiles and happy.
It's more complicated than that, particularly when it comes from a place of low self-esteem. Which you'd think means you'd soak up compliments like a sponge, when actually it means getting compliments stresses you out, like why are all these people lying to me?!
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Bouncing off Gany's post 3 days ago. Last year in October my sister gave birth to my niece 3 months early and weighing only 1 lb 1 oz - the edge of viability. She had two older kids, who I cared for after school and into the evening so that she could be at the hospital with Zoe. Zoe stayed in the NICU for 8 months, well past Easter, and needless to say through Christmas. We all spent Christmas day in the NICU waiting room, taking turns going bedside (only two are allowed at a time). She was still in the isolette, then.
Since she left the NICU, she's been great. Preemies that early and that small are supposed to struggle their first year. "She'll go back in," my sister was told. But she hasn't. She's thrived. Our only struggle with her has been to convince her that food is not the enemy, that eating is good and something she should try.
Most people right now know about NICU babies and infant health issues from Jimmy Fallon, I get that. So, if you saw his recent monologue with his son, you know he talked a lot about this virus called RSV, that looks like a cold, but can kill babies this delicate.
Because of this virus, my niece doesn't go outside, or in public, or to daycare. When people come in, they wash hands with special soap. If you're sick at all, you wear a mask.
Right now, she doesn't have in-home nursing, so we're taking turns helping care for her. I was there this weekend. On Saturday, as I kept trying to coax sweet potato and turkey mush down her throat, she kept coughing and seemed extra whiny. I told my sister. By Sunday, she had a full-fledged cold, it seemed. She was stuffy and miserable. We didn't even try solids with her and just stuck to the feeding tube. Last night, she developed a fever of 101.
It's probably a cold. It's probably nothing. But this could be very serious, too, and we could end up back in the ER or even at the hospital. I'm sitting here all nervous and worried. Can't imagine my sister is getting much done at work today.
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Hugs offered in spirit to both @Lisse24 and @Cupcake.
Lisse: I'm not a parent, so I don't fully get it; at the same time, will keep all the fingers and toes crossed for you and yours.
Cupcake: ...yeah, that. Absolutely that. It has less to do with what the other person is saying, and more to do with what the voice in the back of the skull is relating through the translation software.
Taking compliments is actually learned behavior; if you don't really get many or don't get them during certain formative periods, it's really easy for them to become this to the brain: 'uh... attention! Attention is usually bad! Time to dive under the desk and hope the potential threat goes away!'
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Cancer can eat a bag of goat dicks. My mother, who has lived her life beyond well (started a half dozen local charities, exercised regularly (hell, she did the running leg of a triathalon last year at 70ish), ate healthily) has brain cancer. Like, Stage III or IV glioblastoma brain cancer. The kind where you're lucky if you have a year.
My daughter is 2 this February, and apparently you don't start making concrete memories until you're 3 at the earliest. This means that not only am I going to lose my mother in the next year or so, but my daughter is probably never going to remember her Mimi except from photos and videos. And she loves her Mimi. Like, adores her. Asks to go see Mimi multiple times most days. And it crushes me to think that she's never going to remember that.
Fuck cancer.
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Fuck cancer.
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Hello! Updates.
I'm trying to find a therapist. Everyone ever is under the impression that I'm on the "spectrum", I don't know about all that, but at the very least I'm pretty damned sure I have ADHD and other weird brain shit going on, so I wanna get help managing these things.
I'm trying to do code stuff again, doing the Harvard CS50 course thing. Hopefully I don't just, y'know, stop.
I worked retail for 4 months.
Predictably had a nervous breakdown and quit.
Never again.
I'm in a weird relationship with a GIRL. Like, a real girl. There is a girl who exists and I kiss this girl.
Incidentally, she does what everyone here always wished they could do. I start talking a lot and spamming irl and then she just covers my mouth and goes "Shhhhh, just, give me like five minutes, please, stop talking".
My music is going well, I think, maybe. I still have a long way to go, my music skill isn't where I want it to be yet.
日本語は勉強します。多分。
So yeah I'm still studying Japanese.
Anyway, I just wanted to give you an annual "I'm not dead yet" update.
I'm on Mega Man MUSH if anyone wants to RP with me. Thinking of maybe joining Fallcoast to scratch this vampire itch.
Here's some black people music.
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@helloproject said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
so I wanna get help managing these things.
Good luck, seriously! You have to do you, first and foremost.
I worked retail for 4 months.
Predictably had a nervous breakdown and quit.
Never again.
I don't blame you. At all.
I'm in a weird relationship with a GIRL. Like, a real girl. There is a girl who exists and I kiss this girl.
Good luck.
Anyway, I just wanted to give you an annual "I'm not dead yet" update.
I'd be more concerned if you were and were giving us an update. Regardless, that's still good news, so keep up the good work and stay productive.
I've personally preferred these lately: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TyylUeaTT10 and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmc890o0yYY
