Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

Arkandel

@lotherio said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

I'm finding I don't like comment 'X seemed upstanding to me, I would never have expected (really bad behavior) from X' more and more these days.

Feels like it implies that we should expect the behavior of some people or something. It just feel its redundant, we shouldn't expect anyone to be a mass murderer, rapist, serial killer, clown, pedophile, whatever.

I don't know that I agree. I know people iRL who're too emotional, or whom I've seen kick a wall in frustration, make crude jokes, etc.

Would I expect any of them to escalate it to the point of being killers or whatever? Of course not, that's a hell of an escalation! But if I saw their mugshots somewhere after something bad I'd be able to say something to the effect of "well, that doesn't really surprise me I guess."

What it comes down to is... it's just something people can say because what else can they?

Lithium

That moment when you realize you are smarter and know more than the people who are supposedly 'training' you and because you are a new hire, you can't just correct every /wrong thing they say/.

insomniac7809

@arkandel said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

@lotherio said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

I'm finding I don't like comment 'X seemed upstanding to me, I would never have expected (really bad behavior) from X' more and more these days.

Feels like it implies that we should expect the behavior of some people or something. It just feel its redundant, we shouldn't expect anyone to be a mass murderer, rapist, serial killer, clown, pedophile, whatever.

I don't know that I agree. I know people iRL who're too emotional, or whom I've seen kick a wall in frustration, make crude jokes, etc.

Would I expect any of them to escalate it to the point of being killers or whatever? Of course not, that's a hell of an escalation! But if I saw their mugshots somewhere after something bad I'd be able to say something to the effect of "well, that doesn't really surprise me I guess."

What it comes down to is... it's just something people can say because what else can they?

There was a quote in Homicide: A Year On the Killing Streets from an interviewee during an investigation: "I'm shocked he did it, but I'm not surprised he did it, you know?"

ThatGuyThere

@insomniac7809 said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

There was a quote in Homicide: A Year On the Killing Streets from an interviewee during an investigation: "I'm shocked he did it, but I'm not surprised he did it, you know?"

I know that feeling, there are a couple of people that I have known that I would not blink if I saw on the news that they had killed someone, none has but if they did my response would not be surprised. And their are some people I know that even if they confessed I would have trouble believing would have ever harmed a person.

Darinelle

@lotherio said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

I'm finding I don't like comment 'X seemed upstanding to me, I would never have expected (really bad behavior) from X' more and more these days.

Feels like it implies that we should expect the behavior of some people or something. It just feel its redundant, we shouldn't expect anyone to be a mass murderer, rapist, serial killer, clown, pedophile, whatever.

Its too much to ask I know, but I'd rather hear, 'I never saw that coming, but glad someone put a stop/stuck up to X's behavior, I feel bad knowing it happened, I'd feel worse knowing it continued'.

I'm dealing with a lot of RL drama about this right this moment. So I'll just say this: If a bunch of people report X for doing something, and you never saw the action? It's because it was totally calculated/deliberate. If someone's just batshit or lashes out, chances are high that EVERYONE KNOWS IT.

The ones who manage to hide it except for their targets? Those are the truly evil people.

Packrat

The fun of being cold called by insurance scam idiots 'We have heard that you were in a car accident'.

I do not own or drive a car
They could not then answer when I asked what my name was. Just how did they supposedly 'hear' this?

Arkandel

@packrat They aren't idiots, they're just playing the numbers. For every hundred people who ask back reasonable questions to stay safe they just need one who is an actual idiot (or just old enough...) and they're in business.

Karmageddon

My brain immediately went to this movie. If ever called by such scammers, please please please describe the "accident" in these terms.

surreality

@karmageddon "Oh, my god! I totally thought they had given up! When I told them I was giving my husband head at the time, they said I had no case!"

"...you were giving your husband head while he was driving?!"

"...don't be ridiculous. He would have gone right off the fucking road if I was doing that. What do you think I am, stupid?"

"Whew."

"I was driving."

<click>

Karmageddon

@surreality ALL THE HEARTS.
alt text

RnMissionRun

@packrat said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

The fun of being cold called by insurance scam idiots 'We have heard that you were in a car accident'.

I do not own or drive a car

They could not then answer when I asked what my name was. Just how did they supposedly 'hear' this?

I deal with this this type of thing all the time at work.

Last Friday, someone with a heavy accent called me at work, claiming to be from the local electric coop. He demanded that I pay $1500 in past due electric bills (which is approx. 7 months worth of normal usage for us) and threatened to cut off our power if we did not do so immediately. I asked him why he was calling me instead of the corporate office, you know, the place that had been paying all of the bills for as long as we had been a company. He then demanded the number of our corporate office. I told him "Sure, I'll give you the number, as soon as you explain to me how it is that you don't have that information when we've been doing business with you guys for more than twenty years." That led to a bunch of threats of what would happen if I did not pay the bill immediately, so I hung up on him. Naturally I called corporate afterwards just to make sure that there wasn't a genuine problem.

Some of these scammers are real pros. Even when you call them out, they'll continue to try to get your money until you hang up on them. I can truly understand why so many people fall victim to their BS.

surreality

@rnmissionrun I had a similar one once that was... beyond. My husband was listening in from the next room on and off at the time and he swears to this day he has genuinely never in his life seen me a fraction as angry as I was with the person on this call. It was bad enough that we did actually follow up with the FCC and some other federal org as well as calling the corporate office of the company that had been named in the call to register a formal complaint about their call center's antics; I don't recall which off-hand but I know I got a call from some division of the FBI (involving scams or fraud?) that was apparently looking into it which was a really enlightening chat (and was not brief, either). It became doubly obvious somebody had actually followed up on it from the legal end because one of the bigwigs at whatever company this was called to more or less beg forgiveness and swear up one side and down the other they were not going to do whatever, and was the only person I spoke to who was not clearly calling from an international telemarketing farm in broken English.

This one was a scam that's particularly aggravating, but a lot of y'all will never have to deal with (I hope). Anybody who runs their own business or has registered a business has probably gotten something along these lines more than once, though. Mainly, there are companies that provide 'helpful listings of BtoB services by category' (and whatnot) that then enter all of your business data they can get a hold of to sell to other companies. This happened a lot with web site registrations back when, it happens with state listings of 'this is now a business', and there are other ways it happens, too -- there are folks paid to go to trade shows of every stripe and just pick up every business card they can find to enter the data. (That's how they grabbed ours, at a craft show; the specific info they had was the information we had only on that card and only at that show that year.)

They don't ask you, and they don't inform you in any way. They just list you in their database and create a registry, which they then sell access to to other businesses. A lot of them do this when starting out, so they can appear to have a broad range of existing clients in order to attract new clients.

Well, that business no longer exists and hasn't for well over a decade now. (Do we still get calls asking for it because of this crap? YARP.) Needless to say, usually when you say, "Remove my listing, this business is not active," they just shrug and hang up and bother you again next year. I'd like to say they remove inactive listings, but I pretty much doubt it, because, hey, LOOK AT ALL THE CLIENTS WE HAVE! (Accuracy? Pfft, that's for the legitimate companies!)

This time, when I said, "Remove the listing, that business has not existed for at least a decade," this shitpile of a stain on humanity demanded I pay them over $1k for 'providing the listing for 6 years'. Yes, they listed a business that had already been defunct for at least 4 years at the time in their database, without my knowledge or permission, and were now demanding a pile of money to remove it from the listing for 'the service they had provided'. When I asked, "So, you're admitting this is what you did, and now you expect money for it?" ...and the guy actually admitted that, yes, that's exactly what they were doing. Not even kidding here.

The screaming was genuinely legendary. I am pretty certain the neighbors heard me. This asshole kept me on the line for over half an hour demanding I owed them this money.

Needless to say, when said 'bigwig' called to assure me they wouldn't be asking for a penny from me and would remove me from their listings and would not bother me again, and would be firing the call center employee and that person's manager, I was like, "Cool."

When he asked if I would retract the complaint with the FCC/etc., I pleasantly replied, "Oh, no. I'm afraid I won't be doing that. Your entire business model is disingenuous and exploitative. If you aren't doing anything shady, you don't have anything to worry about, right?"

Cue nervous laughter. "I understand, ma'am."

I cannot begin to express the loathing I have for that business model, and it's really goddamned popular. The shady ones just sell their outdated databases to each other after a while, so every so often, every few years, we get a round of calls asking for the information that was only ever on that one iteration of the business card...

Ganymede

@rnmissionrun

I was once a victim of a scam. The caller left a message and claimed to be an officer from the IRS. So, I called them back because, well, that's what I do.

Them: Our records show that you owe over $5,000 in back taxes. A lawsuit has been filed against you.
Me: Really? When was the complaint served? I haven't received my certified mail.
Them: pause The complaint was mailed to you.
Me: Was it certified mail? Because, if not, the complaint does not comply with Rule 4.
Them: You have been served, sir.
Me: No, I haven't.
Them: You still owe the money.
Me: Let me speak to Jim Keegan.
Them: What?
Me: Jim Keegan? He's your regional chief compliance officer.
Them: No, he's not.
Me: Yes, he is. I spoke with them four days ago in a separate case, where I represent a receivership.
Them: What?
Me: A receivership. May I speak to Agent Keegan?
Them: There's no Jim Keegan here.
Me: Then you're not the IRS, I have your phone number, and I am a prosecutor. What's your name?
Them: click

tek

People who don't mute their phones in public. No one wants to hear your clicky typey sounds and your dinging.

Auspice

@tek said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

People who don't mute their phones in public. No one wants to hear your clicky typey sounds and your dinging.

I keep begging my coworker to turn his off.

ALL. DAY.
Ding.
Ding.
Ding.
Ding.

He claims the vibration is more annoying.

FUCKING HOW YOU INSENSITIVE MOTHERFUCKER?

surreality

@auspice Maybe he keeps it in his pocket, and it's more a matter of being too sensitive for the vibrate function.

Would you rather be that guy in the office with the annoying phone, or the perpetual awkward boner?

(I have girl parts, so I don't know, but I would guess I'd be more terrified of being the latter if I had boy parts.)

RnMissionRun

@auspice said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

@tek said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

People who don't mute their phones in public. No one wants to hear your clicky typey sounds and your dinging.

I keep begging my coworker to turn his off.

ALL. DAY.
Ding.
Ding.
Ding.
Ding.

He claims the vibration is more annoying.

FUCKING HOW YOU INSENSITIVE MOTHERFUCKER?

This pisses me off, too. Fortunately my company does allow us to use our phones while we are on the clock. They're to be turned off/muted and left in the office until breaktime/end of shift. To disobey this policy is a potential firing offense.

Sometimes it's annoying not to have access to my phone while I am at work, but other times I am grateful for the policy because I honestly don't think that I could deal with the constant DING DING DING of FB notifications all day long.

Auspice

@surreality said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

@auspice Maybe he keeps it in his pocket, and it's more a matter of being too sensitive for the vibrate function.

Would you rather be that guy in the office with the annoying phone, or the perpetual awkward boner?

(I have girl parts, so I don't know, but I would guess I'd be more terrified of being the latter if I had boy parts.)

At least turn it down, maybe? I swear he keeps it on full volume. Like this is not a quiet ding. This is a loud AF ding.

And then the typing.
And the FB Messenger ding.
And the Discord ding.
And then the game noises as he plays whatever games between tickets.

I think he just gives no goddamn fucks about the people around him.

surreality

@auspice Ohgod.

OK, maybe just thinking of him as 'dude who absolutely must be facing the potential of the awkward boner' will help you out some. It sounds spiteful, I know, but sometimes it helps to train the brain to think, "Unless the direst of circumstances weren't facing this particular idiot, I would shove them out the nearest window."

No, really! There's a whole area of psychology involving how we make excuses for children doing dumbass shit because they're children, in order to give them the benefit of the doubt (whether they deserve it or not) without going insane in the process, and there's some traction behind the notion of trying to extend this thinking to others. Not to infantilize them or think less of them, but to reduce the stress on ourselves when it comes to dealing with their special, special, oh-so-special instances of omg stupid.

Lithium

@surreality Reminds me of this training class, it is full of very stupid people. People who have to be walked through something by the trainer, when they literally just saw him walk someone else through the /exact same thing/ not ten seconds before.

There are at least a dozen of these people in this class.

The worst offender will break into the voicechat in order to make sure she holds up the class and gets the trainers personal attention.

She is so stupid that I and few others now use the name 'Martha' for anyone who is an idiot.

So when one of the other stupid people do something stupid or ask a stupid question he /just answered/, one of us will inevitably go:

Why? Whygodwhy?

And the answer is always along the likes of: Cuz Martha.