The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves)
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Yeah I've already been diagnosed with mild to moderate OCD though thankfully my issues largely are not compulsive. Unfortunately the obsession is sometimes still really bad (contamination, specifically poisoning, at times veering into outright paranoia).
It sounds like I have this thing, or at the least some form of executive function disorder other than OCD. Now I just have to figure out how to deal with it.
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@Rinel said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
But now I'm more confused, lol. I rarely miss deadlines, but that's because I tend to cram at the very last minute. Maybe I have mild ADHD
That's actually pretty common. ADHD brains work well in crisis situations because they give us the jolt of neurotransmitters we need to focus properly. Also, we work better if we're interested in the task at hand.
And like @Auspice said - there are different variations. Besides just mild to severe, "Executive Functioning" covers a broad swath of skills, and folks with ADHD can have challenges in some but not others. (More details)
For instance - my kids and I are all time-blind, distractible, and prone to hyperfocus. We all interrupt each other and go off on rambly tangents during conversations. Man, watching the three of us trying to talk about something must be comical.
But we also have our own variations. Kid A is externally hyperactive. Kid B will be in tears (as Auspice described) if they need to do a homework assignment but can't force themselves get started on it. B procrastinates, A wants to do things NOW NOW NOW. They both have trouble breaking down a big task into its component steps, but I don't.
As a result, the coping strategies that I've developed (completely unknowingly, since I didn't realize I had it until my kids were diagnosed) don't always work for my kids, because their brand of ADHD is different than mine. And what works for one kid doesn't always work for the other.
TL;DR; ADHD is complicated. If you think you might have it, get a professional assessment and someone who can help you develop strategies for your specific brand of challenges.
P.S. Those are some cool churches.
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I just need to say, I love you guys. It's really a relief knowing it's not just me, and I'm not the only one who didn't know it until adulthood.
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@Rinel If you want interesting tidbits on Gothic churches and their architecture, do a search for 'R. W. Billings' in the various online library collections out there. Some neat stuff. He also did two books examining the geometry behind Gothic windows. They were all published over a century ago and goddammit even the notes for the workbook-style things are really interesting, like how he made an effort to do one of them specifically in a printing method that meant more people could access it and develop their skills and and and and...
Totally not saying that because it's a rabbit hole I fell down a month or so ago, noooooo, not at all, sorry not sorry. (No, really, there's some cool stuff, so it's worth peeking at if you're really interested.)
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Thank you so much. My psychiatrist suggested it as a diagnosis but we're still exploring treatment options. So I'm trying to learn more healthy management techniques online.
ETA: @surreality ooh I love Gothic architecture!
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@Rinel said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
But now I'm more confused, lol. I rarely miss deadlines, but that's because I tend to cram at the very last minute. Maybe I have mild ADHD? Talking about this is really weird because, like... some of the stuff is me to a T. All the time. Messy (more like absolute disaster) of a room, papers always everywhere, scattered, disorganized, make fancy plans and never go through with them, always forget to send thank you cards, bills pile up, etc...
But, like, at work? I'm fine at work. I mean, I get distracted constantly, but I get shit done on time, even though deadlines are really stressful. I don't know if this means I just have a mild form of the disorder or if being undiagnosed for 30 years means I developed coping strategies that let me function albeit miserably.So, hm.
On the one hand (this is important) we are not healthcare professionals seeing you in person and it's a long-established truth that a layman or first-year student reading a medical textbook or the DSM will learn to their surprise that they have goddamn everything. We can't give a diagnosis.
On the other hand, what we're talking about and what you're talking about sound like a lot of my experiences, and it seems likely you have it too. Most psychiatric disorders are on a spectrum in any case, so sometimes teasing out the exact difference between a mild disorder and a personality trait is as much a definitional issue as anything, yeah? And if it is similar enough, we can at least share sympathy and coping strategies. (Although I don't recommend looking for those from me.)
And yes, as mentioned, a lot of us manage deadlines by using the stress-panic to cram it in at the last second. (Little anecdote: in college, I had one professor who was always annoyed with me because he kept getting A- papers from me that would've been a solid A if they were just proofread. The reason they weren't, of course, was that I'd finished the essays three minutes before class started and set them to print in the lab I passed on the way.)
Personally, I often do a lot better at work than otherwise because "do X thing in Y situation by Z time" is direct and manageable while "sort your fucking life out" is vague and undefined and open-ended and I'll get to starting it as soon as I'm done watching YouTube and shitposting on MSB.
And yeah, 30-odd years of coping strategies are a whole thing, which is why it's easiest to get an ADD diagnosis as a kid. It's a been a whole level of fun for me that, being resistant to medication or therapy already, I get psych people assuming an ADD diagnosis in my thirties means I'm cruising for drugs.
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@insomniac7809 said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
On the one hand (this is important) we are not healthcare professionals seeing you in person and it's a long-established truth that a layman or first-year student reading a medical textbook or the DSM will learn to their surprise that they have goddamn everything. We can't give a diagnosis.
Definitely good advice.
I do think that self-diagnosis (or "self-assessment" is a better term) has its place when you approach things from a perspective of struggles and strategies.
If you struggle with the same things that ADHD brains struggle with, the strategies that help ADHD brains may help you too, even if your struggles are actually caused by something other than ADHD. In many cases, the label is less important than finding tools that help you.
Dr. Google is no substitute for professional care, of course, but not everybody has the luxury of the time/finances/access/etc. necessary to get it.
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@faraday said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
I do think that self-diagnosis (or "self-assessment" is a better term) has its place
when you approach things from a perspective of struggles and strategies.If you struggle with the same things that ADHD brains struggle with, the strategies that help ADHD brains may help you too, even if your struggles are actually caused by something other than ADHD. In many cases, the label is less important than finding tools that help you.
Totes (GD "totes" doesn't ping Chrome's spellcheck), and while I see how I might have suggested I was, it wasn't my intent to say people shouldn't self-assess. Like I said, we can share sympathy and coping strategies whether or not someone has a diagnosis, and a lot of the same shit is likely to be helpful (up to and including 'this is a brainmeats issue not a failure of character').
I'm just saying, when it comes to things like "<lived experience> seems different from what's being described, I'm confused about whether or not I have this," I wanted to be clear that the response here has to be "I cannot say whether or not you do, because I am not a doctor even a little tiny bit and if I was then a diagnosis in these circumstances would be a gross violation of ethics."
But as you say, that in no way interferes with the exchange of strategies, struggles, and sympathies.
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You are not lazy. You have executive dysfunction, and you get overwhelmed more easily than neurotypical people because you have issues with prioritizing and time management.
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@Wretched said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
@Rinel We have an interest based nervous system. If we arent 'into' something it takes mental en ergy and time moves slow and its so effortful and ugh
Wait? That's ADHD? Fuck, I thought that was normal.
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@insomniac7809 @faraday I really, really do appreciate the help y'all have given me. I should emphasize that the reason I'm even thinking about this is because after talking to me about my energy levels and behavior my psychiatrist said I likely have ADHD and has suggested medication. So I have been diagnosed, I suppose; I just have to figure out to handle it.
And doubting my validity is not so much a personality trait as it is my entire personality at this point.
So a lot of this is just sort of trying to focus on what I'm dealing with, because I'm profoundly ignorant of the illness.
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@Rinel said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
And doubting my validity is not so much a personality trait as it is my entire personality at this point.
I feel this all the way.
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Oh look. It's 2:30 in the afternoon. And there's a Lunchable, because I have to eat, or my sugars will plummet. Whee.
(Depression is hitting hard. So is anxiety and aggravation. So.. that's a thing)
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That last one, oof.
I have both, a) worried something was wrong with me because I didn't seem to 'feel' as others did when someone died, b) been accused of just seeking attention when it'd finally hit me days or weeks later.
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@Wretched The vegetables one, all me. And the death one. Really all of them, but the first one and the last one especially.
@Auspice I have stopped telling my job when someone has passed and started telling them when it hits me that they've passed. Because yeah, trying to take angry phone calls while suddenly dealing with loss is shit.
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So this explains why games of Peekaboo still entertain me to this day.
