Jul 17, 2020, 1:12 AM
@Wretched said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
My wife says that I am enough children.
Your mom said that you were enough children.
The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves)
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@Wretched said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
My wife says that I am enough children.
Your mom said that you were enough children.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
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@Ganymede Then why do I have younger siblings?!
...are poor life decisions genetic?!
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So uh... someone I follow on social media, has been doing some video chats with various experts about autism and being on the spectrum. She has a daughter who is diagnosed autistic, and took a test, that heavily suggested she may be, as well.
I took the test. Let's just say I never, ever, thought some of the things I do/feel/etc, could be autism related. I thought everyone felt/did/etc those things
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@Macha said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
et's just say I never, ever, thought some of the things I do/feel/etc, could be autism related. I thought everyone felt/did/etc those things
It's been very interesting for me, learning about neurodiversity, to be like: "Oh, so that's why other people seem to do/feel/see things so differently."
I will point out, though, that there's a fair chunk of overlap between autism and ADHD symptoms. Some researchers are beginning to suspect that they may be on the same spectrum, or very closely related.
This chart is kind of reductive in asserting that all people with ADHD or ASD have the checkmarks, or none of them have the blanks, which is decidedly not true. But it's still useful for highlighting the commonalities.
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Can you be both? I have a variety of interests but rigid adherence to routines.
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Some of the things that make it clear that I'm on the spectrum and ADHD:
- I have fabric issues. I don't like the feeling of fabric-on-fabric (if you get this, you get this). If a certain fabric bothers me, I cannot 'just deal.' Part of why I love Squishables (I've gotten a lot of people hooked on these things recently </no shame>) is that they are so fucking touchable and soft and pretty much satisfy that need for something to feel 'right.'
- I can get 'locked in' to doing something and if I get interrupted, it's not just breaking the cycle (like an ADHD hyperfocus)... I actually get agitated. I feel like the ADHD actually helps me balance here.
- I like my routine. I like it a lot. ADHD may not make it a SCHEDULE type of routine, but I have my routine. I play X game on my phone before sleep, I do Y things when I wake up in the morning. I put my shoes in Z location. My keys are always in my RIGHT pocket. I always sit on the LEFT side of the couch (yes, I have a 'but that's my seat').
- Similar-ish to above... I can't handle people standing/walking behind me. That flips the agitation trigger. I know that isn't an ADHD thing. And it's not really an... anxiety thing. But I feel an almost physical crawling sensation when someone is behind me. So I tend to sit with my back to a wall in restaurants, I don't like open floor plans in offices where people can just wander behind me. I don't even like if a friend is leaning over my shoulder to look at my screen when I invite them to do so (I'll lean to the side so that I don't have that creepy-crawling sensation).
There's probably more. But, like ADHD........women and autism is so different than men and autism and welp, guess which was used to decide the standard.
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@Auspice Good god if you are standing/sitting behind me while I'm on the computer I will not react well. That agitation is real.
I think a lot of those you are describing have been pretty typical of my experience. I hate 'schedules' but i have 'things' 'patters' 'spots' etc. that are toitally irrational and IMPORTANT.
The Locked in thing I get lots too. I'm IN THE MIDDLE OF MY THING FUCK ALL THE WAY OFF>
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@Wretched said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
@Auspice Good god if you are standing/sitting behind me while I'm on the computer I will not react well. That agitation is real.
I think a lot of those you are describing have been pretty typical of my experience. I hate 'schedules' but i have 'things' 'patters' 'spots' etc. that are toitally irrational and IMPORTANT.
The Locked in thing I get lots too. I'm IN THE MIDDLE OF MY THING FUCK ALL THE WAY OFF>
My parents always gave me shit for the seating thing.
'What are you doing, pretending you're some character from one of your books?'But my father is so so so neurotypical and doesn't even try to comprehend even if my mother has major depression that has eaten at her all her life. But he's so domineering he gets her to think the same way. My one brother with very classic ADHD has never been treated for it...not because of the whole 'oh they over-medicate kids for this' but 'if anyone in our church finds out one of my kids is on medication for some brain damage bullcrap, they won't respect me anymore'
I keep wishing he'd (he's 24) move out and get a place of his own, but his ADHD is so bad he can't drive. So he's sort of beholden to our other brother (they work at the same place) to give him rides to/from work. If I was in a financial position to do so and could line up a job for him, I'd get him out here. Push some more independence at him. Get him a damn psychiatrist who would get him on the meds he needs.
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@Macha Just out of curiosity, what/where's the test?
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@Auspice One of my kids has the sensory fabric issues and the difficulty transitioning (being "locked in" once they get into something), which are symptoms of their ADHD. The other has the behind-me thing, which is more tied to their OCD. They are definitely not autistic.
Which is not to say your conclusions are invalid about yourself - you know yourself best, and I am not trying to dissuade you from your self-assessment. I merely use this to illustrate the complexities of diagnosis with overlapping symptoms and other co-morbid conditions.
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@Auspice OCD and ADHD and probably autism checking in to say... you have friends here. There are so many little things that piss me off for what most people would consider to be no rational reason. Literally like someone is driving nails into my spine or something. I don't know if it's sensory, if it's OCD, if it's me just being a grumpy bitch who hates everything but Good God. I feel you.
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You guys .. The whole 'people walking/standing behind me, need my back to a wall' - I thought that was just me. (and maybe some of my PTSD. My abuser would come up behind me while I was sitting and grab my neck or my hair, etc - so it's probably both). And yet, I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes, because these things - they're not /just me/. I'm 'weird' but I'm not alone.
@Ninjakitten I attempted to link it, but it tells me the url expired. I have a copy of it, if you give me somewhere to email it?
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People generally prefer sitting with their backs to walls, though I imagine it can be amplified. I know lots of NTs who can't stand people behind them as they write or work on their PC.
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@faraday
Well, it's not just self-assessment. My being OCD and on the spectrum are two things that are diagnosed.My OCD was diagnosed back when I was a teenager. The being on the spectrum just a few years ago when I was in therapy and my therapist picked up on it and wanted to explore it more.
I do think they all have overlap and all sort of....get in bed with one another as it were but it is a whole thing for sure.
@Macha you are def not alone. I have nothing to hook my thing about people being behind me to. I just can't do it. I'm someone super finicky about going out with. I can't ride in the back seat for longer than 20 ish minutes or I get car sick (since a surgery I had a handful of years ago). I can't sit where people can walk behind me (or else I'll be standing up and moving and pacing about). And I can't sit on the inside of a booth because the sense of being trapped triggers my claustrophobia. I am terrible for group outings.
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@Auspice When I get rich and come visit, we'll find somewhere in a corner and not be crowded. Heh.
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@Auspice I always enjoyed hanging out with you!
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@PuppyBreath said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
@Auspice I always enjoyed hanging out with you!
<3! One-on-one is good! Front seat in the car is guaranteed, booth sitting at restaurants means I still have open space and I'm not trapped inside.
It's when there's groups that I have a problem. XD
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