Autism and The MU* Community

[silverfox]

@il-volpe

CHECKS THAT BOX SO HARD

[GreenFlashlight]

@faraday said in Autism and The MU* Community:

liking clothes without tags isn't in and of itself a problem. But if that same kid is ALSO having a lot of trouble communicating with others, or is so bothered by their shoes being too tight that they can't function... that's the time to maybe look into further evaluation.

Wait, what? Are there people who like clothes with tags, or at least people who don't cut the tags off as soon as they get home?

[faraday]

@greenflashlight said in Autism and The MU* Community:

Wait, what? Are there people who like clothes with tags, or at least people who don't cut the tags off as soon as they get home?

Sure. One of my kids couldn't care less about the tags in their clothes. The other acts like there's hot lava in their shirt if I don't immediately remove the tag. (Getting them to even TRY ON the clothes is a PITA for this reason.)

[faraday]

@silverfox said in Autism and The MU* Community:

I wish I could say this to a particular parent because this is legit. Just this morning they were describing how sometimes their kiddo has to put on several pairs of socks before they find one that feels right (thus leading them to be late to school), plus a lot of other things you guys described.

Dunno if there's a way in your school to recommend them for evaluation; that process seems to vary from place to place.

Some resources in case you have an opportunity to share or want to read more:

Regarding the socks issue specifically - sensory processing can occur with autism or ADHD, possibly with other things:

https://www.understood.org/articles/en/understanding-sensory-processing-issues

https://www.understood.org/articles/en/what-is-autism

[thhppbbbt]

I have a child who's been diagnosed autistic, and haven't ruled out that I might be. A lot of my experience makes a lot of sense when seen through that lens. I remember taking a psychology class in college and proposing to my professor that I could write as an honors paper a reflection on how roleplaying games have allowed me to formalize certain social rules, habits, and cues that otherwise confounded me growing up (including research within the community to find out if this was a common thing). I didn't think I was autistic then. Having an autistic child now hasn't convinced me that I am - I just think it's a little likelier than I did. I'm not neurotypical - and to whatever extent I do share traits or proclivities with autistic people, I think that roleplaying online has been incredibly adaptive for that.

[il-volpe]

@thhppbbbt Not so long ago we called this BAP ("Broader Autism Phenotype") or "cousins."

[Ganymede]

@greenflashlight said in Autism and The MU* Community:

Wait, what? Are there people who like clothes with tags, or at least people who don't cut the tags off as soon as they get home?

That's me. I like tags and use them to figure out how to wash my shit properly.

[thhppbbbt]

@il-volpe Yeah, I've got ADHD for sure. The overlap is... not small. But there's also stuff that ADHD doesn't quite cover, and some of the diagnostic criteria aren't things that cause me any trouble now, but that's also because of significant adaptations in my life. I do Remember When.

[Clarity]

@thhppbbbt This is pretty much me. I learned so much on how to socialise and interact with people through roleplaying online. I mean, it's ways they have been teaching my son on the spectrum how to navigate tricky social situations through roleplay.

So I figure it's not really that different?

On the topic of tags and clothes, I'm definitely not a fan of tags. I also don't like most clothes that are too fitting, so bootleg jeans all the way. It can take me a while to get used to something new in my wardrobe. Sometimes it sits there for weeks, or even months before I can wear it. I would happily wear the same thing day after day if I could get away with it. And on days where I stay home and don't need to go out, I often do. I really dislike metal jewelry. And I don't like the feel of most makeup on my skin at all.

Another quirk, it can take me a while to... process new things. Kinda similar having new clothes. So, this thread, after posting and seeing lots of replies, it took me quite a while before I could read and post today. Not that I didn't want to, but I don't know. It is hard to explain. Autism and me is still very new to me. Autism, me and discussing it even more so.

[Groth]

@clarity said in Autism and The MU* Community:

I would happily wear the same thing day after day if I could get away with it.

Who says you can't? I hate finding new clothes to wear so whenever I have to buy new clothes, I just buy lots of them in different colors and just switch color throughout the week.

Like many others in the thread I've found MU* to be a place where I can be a social in a way I have neither the energy nor ability to do elsewhere. Social cue's are more apparent and in a world of text you don't have the same countless distractions everywhere, it allows me to pretend to be socially adept.

[Clarity]

@groth I think, until this awareness of my being on the spectrum, my go-to was always to try fit in and fake everything and hope no one would notice. So while at home I might stick to wearing the same things (usually boot-leg jeans + random geek inspired shirt + cute printed bamboo socks), I would be hyper aware of what I wore out last time I saw person x and I try not to wear the same thing, in case I get 'caught out'.

Now I'm slowly starting to be more me. But it's just also being aware of where I can do that and where I can't. And that can be anxiety inducing trying to figure that out. I know in an ideal world that would be everywhere. I'm still slowly figuring it all out.

It's scary though, sometimes. With all this masking, for so long, trying to delve beneath that to work out how who I am.

[faraday]

@groth said in Autism and The MU* Community:

Who says you can't? I hate finding new clothes to wear so whenever I have to buy new clothes, I just buy lots of them in different colors and just switch color throughout the week.

:raises hand: Same. All my clothes are strikingly similar. Just different colors, slight variations.

I'm also a "loose clothes" person. Just thinking about wearing leggings or a turtleneck makes me squirm. Or anything scratchy. I always had to wear a t-shirt underneath my polyester uniform shirts for sports or medic shifts. Even in the summer in the south playing softball.

Random aside - I have a real obsession with numbers and patterns. Logic puzzles, die roll statistics, that kind of thing.

[Rinel]

Doctors say I'm not. People who regularly deal with me say I am.

No idea.

[Clarity]

@faraday said in Autism and The MU* Community:

Random aside - I have a real obsession with numbers and patterns. Logic puzzles, die roll statistics, that kind of thing.

Same. I even make spreadsheets of data from various interests of mine, including mu* games that I play. Idle games appeal for the same reason, particularly ones that are numbers focused.

[Clarity]

@rinel Talking to various people in the community it can be a long and difficult road to getting diagnosed, particularly as adults. Doubly so if you are female.

I found this to be a really good resource and starting point though: https://embrace-autism.com/

[Carma]

This post is deleted!

[Derp]

@carma said in Autism and The MU* Community:

For anyone who's word-focused instead of number-focused, someone showed me junimojis, and they're a ton of fun.
How to play.

Puzzle example.

You fit all the letters of a given number into its box. Any remaining blocks in the box become blank squares. It's kind of like an acrostic, but you're given the letters to all the answers instead of clues, and you have to divine the shape of the board, which is always symmetrical.

Welp.

See you all in three years.

[il-volpe]

Hehe, clothes all the same. Remember the Jeff Goldblum The Fly (1986)? He's got seven identical suits. I was 11 and said, "I am gonna do that when grow up."

[Too Old For This]

@silverfox said in Autism and The MU* Community:

@faraday

Huh.

I wish I could say this to a particular parent because this is legit. Just this morning they were describing how sometimes their kiddo has to put on several pairs of socks before they find one that feels right (thus leading them to be late to school), plus a lot of other things you guys described.

SOCKS ARE THE DEVIL!

Seriously, if you knew how much time I spend having to find the EXACT RIGHT pair of socks out of all of my socks... I will literally wear a single pair multiple days in a row because I know they fit together and I might just cry if I have to keep trying to re-match all my socks together every day...

[Clarity]

@too-old-for-this I have a particular fondness and something of an obsession with bamboo socks. They feel so nice on.