RL Anger

Kay

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Lithium

Tina thunderdome

ETA: Props to Tina for that costume, the thing weighed like 75 lbs!

Coin

@coin said in RL Anger:

Tina knows me.

YOUR MOM knows you!

... And loves you very much no matter who you choose to be.

I dunno, man, sometimes I can feel the disappointment. ;________;

Tinuviel

@coin That just means she cares.

Thenomain

@coin said in RL Anger:

@thenomain said in RL Anger:

@coin said in RL Anger:

Tina knows me.

YOUR MOM knows you!

... And loves you very much no matter who you choose to be.

I dunno, man, sometimes I can feel the disappointment. ;________;

That's how she shows that sh—

... Goddammit @Tinuviel.

Macha

Dear Dr Twat - you fucked up the referral, you denied to my face --the thing you said to my face, and you have zero interest in actually finding out what the issue at the root level is. Please go die in a fire, thanks.

Sparks

I would like breathable air back in my city, thanks.

Kay

@sparks Supposed to clear up within the next day, wind from the sea pushing the smoke up to Canada! Also they promised RAIN this weekend!

Thenomain

This one is truly an RL concern of mine, though anyone active on the forum today can guess where it stems from. Well it's more than that.

It's okay if someone hates something that you like.

It's okay. They are just one person. You are allowed to like things that other people don't. They are allowed to not like things that you like.

You know that song, "It's okay to not like things"? That includes not liking people who don't like things. Being a dick to them is also not okay.

There are, of course, exceptions to all of this, times where escalation is valid, but you've got to start by stopping and thinking: Is this okay? Or is this going to make the problem worse? (And if so, are you going to take ownership of your role, or are you doing it just to be a troll?)

And no, being a troll to a troll never ends well for those around you. Ever.

Sunny

@thenomain

IDGAF if somebody doesn't like things, or if somebody hates things. Lying about the reasons for it, being blatantly untruthful, is what I object to. He was referring to me, as one of the people who upvoted those posts. Half of the people he was referring to do not even play on that game. I don't play on that game, it's not a thing that I like. I don't disagree with you in principle, but again: get my name out of your mouth if you don't want me to weigh in. He had my name in his mouth with the statement I objected to.

Thenomain

@sunny

If I wasn't talking about you, then why are you coming here to defend yourself? What's there to defend? (I really have no idea what you're talking about, and honestly it's not important for me to know.)

This kind of "rushing to the defense of something not needing defense" is exactly what I was talking about, though, so now I am.

Partisanism sucks, people. It really, really does.

Sunny

@thenomain said in RL Anger:

@sunny

If I wasn't talking about you, then why are you coming here to defend yourself? What's there to defend?

This kind of "rushing to the defense of something not needing defense" is exactly what I was talking about, though, so now I am.

Partisanism sucks, people. It really, really does.

Sorry, I'm not following you. You are obviously referring to me, with your 'anyone active on the forum today will know what I'm talking about wink wink nudge nudge' and having JUST called me out in a thread for the issue you're talking about here. Whatever man.

ETA: Literally all I did was point out that the statement wasn't true, as a number of the people he was referencing (that included me) don't play there, so couldn't possibly be the 'cool kids' he was complaining about.

Kanye Qwest

@sunny I mean he responded to me, and I don't think anyone who upvoted my post plays there. I know you and Apos don't. I doubt Saosmash does. But ell oh ell to him and his grapes imo

Sunny

@kanye-qwest said in RL Anger:

@sunny I mean he responded to me, and I don't think anyone who upvoted my post plays there. I know you and Apos don't. I doubt Saosmash does. But ell oh ell to him and his grapes imo

Apparently it's not OK these days to defend yourself when somebody lies about you, though. You're just being mean to somebody if you object to being lied about.

Thenomain

@sunny

There was no winking and nudging involved.

@thenomain said in RL Anger:

Well it's more than that.

You and others did jump to defend a game with little more than a "nuh-uh", which is already a huge peeve of mine, but you're far from the only person involved in that thread who did that, far from the only person involved in day-to-day life who does that, far from the only person involved in (many) Federal Governments who does that.

This is a stupid way to communicate. It's hate-based segregation, making fun of things you don't like.

And if this isn't you? Then it isn't you. I honestly don't care who it isn't, I care about who it is. It makes my blood boil when people get away with it because they are glib, or because they are charismatic.

There are people who use it as a tool, but like all tools knowing its use gives you more latitude with it. Not knowing how to use it is no excuse to hurt people.

I really, really hate people who hurt others on purpose just because they don't care about them.

And that's the name of this thread.

Sunny

@thenomain said in RL Anger:

I really, really hate people who hurt others on purpose just because they don't care about them.

But it's okay when you do it? OK. (fyi, yeah, you hurt me, and are continuing to do so, by characterizing my self-defense as being offense.)

ETA: switched 'hatred' for 'offense' because that's more accurate.

Deleted

Damn, I forgot my tiny violin. Someone said something -unpleasant- to me on a forum! I am hurt! Nevermind that I made no personal attacks or inferred anything about anyone's character. No, I totally expressed a negative intention towards a group and they are -hurt- by it.

Here's a peeve: Assholes who do that and screech about being 'triggered', thus giving those alt-right nutjobs someone to point at and say 'See? That's what they're all like!'

When we're not all oversensitive little shits.

Thenomain

@sunny

Do I not care about you? I'm attempting to communicate with you, appease you even, which is does not mesh with "do not care".

My point is that you don't need to defend yourself. A lot of people who think they do, don't. It's a matter of accepting proportionate response.

Apos

@thenomain said in RL Anger:

This one is truly an RL concern of mine, though anyone active on the forum today can guess where it stems from. Well it's more than that.

It's okay if someone hates something that you like.

It's okay. They are just one person. You are allowed to like things that other people don't. They are allowed to not like things that you like.

Yeah, but it's the same thing to me as telling someone, 'it's okay to be rude'. Like, for example, we know it's rude to go up to someone and say, 'I don't like your friends and family' or 'I don't like your religion' or 'I don't like anything that you value deeply and define yourself by'. There's common courtesy that dictates that if you tell someone that you dislike something that's deeply meaningful to them, you do so in a way that's conscious of that, or you are willing to deal with them being pissed off about it.

Like, there's a balance of burdens in people not being offended by someone's opinion, and other people wanting to be abrogated of all responsibility in showing a shred of thought in courtesy about whether what they are saying is hurtful to someone else. And a lot of people are tired of allowing people to be rude through thoughtlessness, and while that's certainly better than being rude through intentional, willful cruelty, it's still not great.

Thenomain

@apos

Is it, though? In an open discussion about religion, is saying 'I don't like this religion' rude?

I know you and I disagree about what the Advertisement board is for, but I think it's rude to shit-talk someone for disagreeing, that is without saying something like, "I find that rude for this discussion."

That is, it's not okay (acceptable, not-rude) to be a dick to someone you think is being a dick. It's just making it worse.