For all my life I have used regular shampoo. Had problems with dry ass scalp giving me flakes as a teen, the worst dryest split ends... and now for a couple weeks I have been using low shampoo, or cleansing cream (ok, aka afro shampoo) and I am absolutely in love.
My MIL supports me but not to her face.
She will never tell my SIL the Truth of the matter.
My MIL just wants peace at any cost, even if the cost is my sanity or hers.
So I wrote her a short message and told her some things I knew about what she's been saying about me and husbando and her motives behind it and also that I didn't want any contact with her any more and she's banned from being a part of my family (husband and child's_) life.
I choked for a while to be honest. I don't want to stress my mother in law out any more, but the woman is tearing her apart. She is tearing ME apart.
Another story. On my kid's birthday (5 days ago now) she came over by surprise, and just waltzed into my room, walked in the door and I didn't have any pants on to say hi to my kid. When I was busy trying to get us both ready for guests we weren't expecting. Like... WTFS.
It was also the day we got the news my MIL's sister has cancer in her esophagus.
So later she proceeded to drink several glasses of wine and bitched to my MIL when she showed up 10 mins later about how horrible her life is -- for two hours. My MIL was just torn the fuck up, trying to hide it all and not break down at her grandson's party.
But she did break down eventually and my SIL's reaction was a cool "Oh I heard about that is she ok?" like it was the most casual thing in the world. MIL was very upset about how callous she was.
But I'm finished, I have gotten a lot off of my chest, and from now on that's it.
My MIL will have to respect my decision for the health of my family and sanity.
@Auspice I've had a lot of wrestling with that problem, internally (no mothers needed). My mother in law doesn't handle stress well and while she agrees with me fully about how I feel, I'm tired of having to be the peacemaker and be the victim of this stuff.
But it's to the point where I don't want to even be in the same town as her. She's driving me to the brink of my sanity. I feel sorry for my mother in law a little bit but... I am just done. It's either her or me at this point.
She's lucky I don't call my guy and arrange a surprise exorcism.
Hey, since we're on the subject of sisters.
I have a sister in law that's a trip. And man, I need to let off some steam here.
She was adopted and is considerably older than my husband (she's 51 now). We never knew each other well until she fell on hard time and we decided to open our home to her.
That was two years ago. She moved out shortly thereafter, and then had to move back in October, and she has just moved out.
But she is constantly trying to stir stuff between me and my mother in law. Among other things. Like being an alcoholic.
December just after Christmas she got drunk and wrote my mother in law a letter about how me and my husband were pieces of shit and then didn't talk to us for 3 or 4 days. She moved out, and then asked for money. Twice. Which we didn't have.
She thinks we do because earlier this month, we took out a small loan to redo our house and start our business. It's virtually all used up because we had our things in order to order and go. It was also my kid's 6th birthday, so she saw how we spoiled him. Our car was also broken into and the battery and spare tire were stolen only because they couldn't get our car started once they were inside it (surveillance footage).
And asked for money again.
Now, she popped in and saw all this and was ecstatic and over the moon and insisted on giving me a hug and told me how happy she was for us and then an hour later texted my mother in law about how distraught/distressed she is about something she heard while here.
She is absolutely incapable of feeling true empathy for another creature, human or otherwise. The world revolves around her. One of many examples: When she fell on hard times a couple of years ago (long before we extended our offer) she decided to put her two healthy labs to sleep because she didn't think they'd be able to handle being away from her instead of taking them to a shelter or a rescue.
Last time she lived with us, also, she decided to "surprise" me by picking my child up from school without my knowledge.
I was surprised alright. If she hadn't pulled into the driveway when she did, there was going to be a homicide right in front of the neighbors. Someone at his school was fired over the incident.
See, I mentioned she's an alcoholic? She isn't allowed to drive my child anywhere. I don't even trust her to take a fucking pizza out of the oven.
Anyway, I want to tell her to not have any contact with me or my family any more.
It's come to the point where I think she's flat out possessed.
Being diplomatic isn't my thing, so this is going to go off like a nuclear bomb.
Today, I woke up. I mean, most days I do but this is 5:00 in the morning and my husband was screaming.
Screaming for me to bring a bucket into the bathroom.
You can guess what I thought. We have a six year old and had delivery pizza last night. (Salmonella hoooooooooo!)
But no, no when I get there it's a snake and he is screaming and standing up on the toilet. I felt like I had stumbled into a tom and jerry cartoon.
The snake has wedged itself between the wall and the toilet pipey thingamabob.
I can't get the snake out, I mean it's just a brown house snake and it's harmless except for NOW MY MOTHER IN LAW IS ALSO SCREAMING AND MY EAR DRUMS. ALSO MY DAMN SLEEP.
But it's the funniest thing, and now my husband is telling everyone it charged him while he was on the shitter and I can't stop laughing.
This is why you shouldn't leave your windows open in Africa. It's not often we find pythons, they're usually adders. And watch out, they charge.
Today I sat and watched the South African Airways Cargo Tracker like a hawk with my waybill number and have nearly gone out of my MIND worrying about them arriving on this side safely, etc.
I can finally, happily, announce that Boris and Bela have arrived and my husband has picked them up and SELFISHLY taken them back to work with him. (Stupid salary has him by the short n curlies) I get to meet them in an hour or two.
Incidentally, it's also my kid's birthday so we are trying to pass this off as a birthday present. ("HAPPY BIRTHDAY SON, Mama got you a gift to mama!") I am about to explode not being able to tell him or show him. He took Ry's death hard for a (now) six year old too, and I have a feeling we both are just going to fall to pieces when they finally arrive home.
Thank you everyone for your support and just being there to listen to me. 
(LOL Now that you mention it... Sixteen Candles Ugh, never be able to see it in another light. Gotta rewatch it now.)
As for the rest of it, I completely agree. People change every day. I'm definitely always actively trying to improve and progress in a way that's positive and healthy.
I don't know.
Call me a pessimist, but we are all pieces of shit. We are all human. We all have flaws.
Something something splinters, logs, and eyes.
If you're looking for someone perfect to author your stories, try the Bible. The writing in red or brown is usually the go to bit you're looking for.
... but even that ends up offending people so it just goes to show you can never, ever make everyone happy.
@Pandora I haven't heard of it! When it comes to video games when my friends talk about it I just kinda get a blank stare.
I HAVE been known to finish a few games in the past. Uh. Kingdom Hearts for PS2. Fable! Like all the Fables. Baldur's Gate 1 and 2 for PS2 (but because I played with my husband and kept stealing all the loot sorry not sorry ) and maybe Bloodrayne back in the day because who doesn't like scantily clad vampires kicking nazi ass?
No but really you seem to have found a game that's RIGHT UP my dang alley. I am definitely going to get it tonight and give it a try.
January 3rd, my best friend died. Every day since then I have spent at least 3 hours a day, on average, crying. Last night it was particularly bad. I couldn't sleep. My heart was thoroughly shattered like it had just happened again.
I was shattered, but I didn't want to replace her. No one/thing could. Ever. But I was left with a gaping, sucking chest wound in my heart and soul. So I said, the right dog will come along. And it'll be the right time. And the right... everything. It'll just happen.
Don't tempt fate... Because I have found fate delivers. Apparently in pairs.
Meet Boris (as in Karloff) and Bela (as in Lugosi). Both females. 12 weeks old. We pick them up at the airport tomorrow.
Confession time! I really like paranormal junk, it's the reason why I play WOD and of course you know, you got to get your inspiration/fix somewhere right? I'm not big on beauty gurus (though I do watch a couple on occasion especially if I'm looking to buy something I watch reviews), not big on political anything, definitely don't watch any gamers - I don't like video games generally.
But give me aliens, bigfoot, paranormal stuff, ghosts, demons, and conspiracy theories. Give them ALL to me. If there was a PhD in "wtf" I would definitely have it.
So here's some of my favorite weird youtube channels. Please share your weird youtube channels too. I KNOW I am not the only one out there.
General Weird/Horror
DTTV Studios - Sumerians! Ancient Aliens!
Amazing Stock One of those "TOP TENZ" things, but usually curated a little better than the average.
Creeps McPasta* - He narrates fiction, as a pose to presenting "facts" like most of the other channels here.
Strange But True Stories! - Same with this guy, he narrates "true" stories. Great voice to fall asleep to.
Quest TV
Gaia TV Interesting new age channel. Sometimes has juicy interesting tidbits to mentally chew on.
Bigfoot
Bob Gymlan He doesn't give much of himself away, but he does profess to be a primatologist. Highly doubt this, but you can look into some interesting bigfoot cases through the lens of someone presenting bigfoot as an undiscovered ape species.
Buckeye Bigfoot Bigfoot stories, nice to fall asleep to.
Aliens
Destination Declassified Aliens, top tenz style with a british accent.
LA Marzulli LA Marzulli is LA Marzulli. I have based more than one character of mine on him and his ilk - someone sitting out there with conspiracy theories that seem a little stretched in the middle of the desert broadcasting from the inside of some camper. I mean I don't think he's in a camper, I think he has a studio room in a house but pretty much the same thing. Adore it. Interesting interviews sometimes.
UFO Stop It's your one stop for UFO stuff. Not necessarily like, the freshest (go 90s alien tv!) but it's my staple type of entertainment.
Crime
That Chapter - Okay, bit sized crime stories but also paranormal junk very rarely. Irish accent is adorable.
Love Mondo and James and Tati - I'm not much for the tea as they call it. People have fall outs all the time, people fuck up all the time, people are stupid all the time. Including youtubers. I have some moments in my past where I'm trying to fall asleep at night and my brain is like "hey you remember that time you.." and I lay here wishing I could curl up under a rock for the rest of my life.
So like, I can't judge too much.
But since we're talking about favorite beauty guru types... I definitely have a few favorites. This one needs a mention!
Now, I don't have African type hair, but I still find her vivacious, funny, and her accent makes me feel happy. And I love how adventurous and just not scared she is. Pure gem.
You know what my kid said to me today when I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up?
A youtuber.
Times are a changing. And I have to admit even I "follow" certain people.
The King of DIY Joey had the ugliest and yet prettiest and most personable fish I've ever seen. Named Frank. I cried like a fucking BABY when Frank died. I still watch his channel, and I still want to keep fish one day.
Lofty Pursuits Greg makes hard candy the old fashioned way. There's something about how it's made and his voice that's ultra satisfying/soothing.
Unexplained Mysteries I love my top 10 weird/unexplained shit and I place the blame fully upon Robert Stack's shoulders. Anyway, stuff I fall asleep to.
Best Ever Food Review Show If you like seeing a gigantic awkward sweaty white guy experience cultures through their food, Sonny's show is for you. I'm usually not a fan of food review shows (they're monotonous), but him and Andrew Zimmern I like.
There's only a handfull of my subscriptions... so why don't you show me some of yours?
@Ganymede said in The Art of Lawyering:
@nyctophiliac said in The Art of Lawyering:
Apparently you should write a sequel to the Hitchhiker's Guide. Because they seem like great alien species... and I giggled tremendously thinking they'd be great celestial neighbors to the Vogons.
Oh, they are existing races for the Mass Effect series.
My bad! Even better giggles!
@Ganymede Apparently you should write a sequel to the Hitchhiker's Guide. Because they seem like great alien species... and I giggled tremendously thinking they'd be great celestial neighbors to the Vogons.
So Lawyers, do you have a favorite case? Not necessarily yours, but one that is, I don't know.. unique in some way? Stands out?
Do you have any thoughts or opinions on any high profile cases that we plebs might know about? (I mean, for instance the OJ Simpson Trial but there are plenty I'm sure).
Such interesting answers!
Now I'm curious about other things because my mind wanders!
Do lawyers have stereotypes of other kinds of lawyers?
Are all lawyers pessimistic?
Are you all amazing in social situations because of your jobs? Or do you think that it's a prerequisite?
Is there a lawyer joke you just should absolutely not ever make under any circumstances?
Had to google PI.
It doesn't mean Private Investigator. It means Personal Injury.
Sounds far less fun than my initial assumption. My heart, it breaks.
Anyway, you ever seen in the movies where there's this firm of lawyers who are like "if you win this case we will make you a partner" -> Can someone explain that? Does that actually happen?
What is the bar exam - it's like a licensing test right? Does it cost money to take? Does it last a certain length of time, are there strings attached? What can actually cause you to be disbarred (that's the term right?)? Could to retry the exam later if disbarred?
I wasn't expecting so many good replies! And I wasn't expecting we had THAT many lawyers or legal savvies here in the MUing community.
I think that's awesome. Thank you all! I'm especially amused by all the history and takes on the jury trials. I have always wondered, as my husband brought it up one day many years ago about the American legal system.
Now I'm curious about the "lawyer reputation" you know - blood sucking, etc. Is it because the fees are so expensive or is it because people just didn't get the outcomes they wanted and are now bitter that they didn't get their way like an petulant child?
Why are judges elected in some places, but not in others? Which way is better in our modern times? I'm sure they both have pros and cons.
