Staff needs to set some guidelines as to what is reasonable as far as decision-making goes and what isn't. And if a player is adamant on something happening or not happening, they need to negotiate with staff to come up with a compromise for playability and enjoyment.
Players should have no responsibility to 'play right' according to other players, but they should according to theme, setting and canon. Of course, sometimes a player earns a reputation as being able to recite canon or thematic guidance in what some people call 'backseat staffing', and this can be a problem. Especially since it can undermine staffers.
If there is something I learned with the study of law, though, it's that any decision that doesn't work or can't be implemented should be overturned for something that works and is easily implemented. Staff should always have reserve the prerogative to revise policies, including retroactively.
I think some games have it right, regarding safe middle-grounds, that trying to avoid interaction that isn't purely in-scene helps to decrease attrition.