Jan 25, 2018, 8:13 PM
It's so much fun to bust my ass every day to do my job, and watch a sexist Trumpet who has been here not even half as long get accolades and promotions. It makes me so happy. But it's fine. I'm fine.
It's fine.
RL Anger
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@admiral
I...just realized that our public services are Socialism.
Huh.
(I also realize that we're solidly in Politics board territory.)
“If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe.”
― Carl Sagan, Cosmos -
@thenomain Look more. You'll find other things.
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@thenomain said in RL Anger:
@admiral
I...just realized that our public services are Socialism.
Huh.
(I also realize that we're solidly in Politics board territory.)
Did you really? xD I mean....
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@thenomain Look more. You'll find other things.
This is the basis of science, yes, except that we're supposed to look with a more structured approach.
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@thenomain said in RL Anger:
I...just realized that our public services are Socialism.
Yeah. I mean, seriously, how dare they sneak that in?
It's not like it's in The Wealth of Nations or anything either, that socialist stuff.
(Hint: It is. Peasants.)
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It's so much fun to bust my ass every day to do my job, and watch a sexist Trumpet who has been here not even half as long get accolades and promotions. It makes me so happy. But it's fine. I'm fine.
It's fine.
- 10 days later
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This fucking shit right here.
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Have been in acute pain since November (think kidney stones, if anyone's ever had them). Saw research hospital doctor today. This was supposed to be the light at the end of the tunnel. Instead, I have been run over by the train.
I'm not quite sure what you mean by that but it sounds awful. I hope whatever it is improves -- and sooner than later.
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Trump: The only thing that can make me agree with Jeremy C^Hunt. Do you know how painful that is? He is a weasel who is breaking apart a health service I love and shitting on my day to day job. And now I have to agree with him because of the Wotsit Coloured President.
- 2 months later
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So, I hate my job. It's become this toxic cesspool of suck where I am completely marginalized and spend my days wondering why I even bother.* As if I don't hate my job enough, someone that I don't really get along with has been moved to my team. Maybe it won't be so bad, I told myself. And then this happened..
I'm sitting at my desk, thinking through a UX problem. I am in a mental zone. He comes over, taps on my desk (I had headphones on). I hold up a finger so I can finish my thought/what I am doing and then turn to him.
Me: What's up?
Him: Hey, can you make me an admin on Invision? (Invision is a prototyping app)
Me: Suuure but why do you need to be an admin?
Him: So I can do admin stuff.
Me: Well, yeah. But what sort of admin stuff do you need to do?
Him: You know. Admin stuff.
Me: What stuff?
Him: (exasperated that I didn't just DO IT) You know, add people and edit and .. ADMIN STUFF.
Me: Okay but I already set you as a manager and that allows you to do all that stuf-...
Him: (interrupts) Make me an admin. (walks away)This guy isn't my boss. He's not anyone's boss. He's a designer. I just sat at my desk, stunned that he ordered me around like that. I was shaking with anger and I was doing that stupid girl thing where I was getting tears in my eyes from being so mad. Now, the only difference I can see from one's status being Manager and Admin is that an Admin can change people's statuses. So after a few minutes, I was like .. what-the-fuck-ever and I made him an admin. I think ping'd him on Slack:
Me: you've been made an admin. i would appreciate it if you would not speak to me like that again. ordering people around is disrespectful.
Him: Thanks.
Him: Sorry you felt that way. Wasn’t ordering you around.
Me: 'make me an admin' and then walking away is an order
Him: I said please and thanks. But, if you did feel disrspected, I apologize. It wasn’t intended, I wasn’t trying to be mean. Will you forgive me?
Me: you haven't acknowledged that you did anything wrong in this scenario, just that you feel bad, i guess, that i came away with negative feelings. there is nothing to forgive if you don't feel you did anything wrong. just try to be cognizant of how you treat your coworkers in the future.At that point, he came over to my desk and talked to me in person. Which was better. He apologized for being rude and I told him that what he did made me really upset, that he shouldn't do it again and that he should be more aware of how he treats his coworkers. Him coming over did make me feel better but we will see if it was sincere or if this behavior happens again. he did thank me for bringing up my feelings and I was glad that I did it since my tendency is to keep things bottled up. But god dammit, did that day suck.
** I am trying to get out of there. The sticky problem is that because of the marginalization, I don't have the best stuff to put in my portfolio. Uuuuurgh.*
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@sockmonkey said in RL Anger:
At that point, he came over to my desk and talked to me in person. Which was better. He apologized for being rude and I told him that what he did made me really upset, that he shouldn't do it again and that he should be more aware of how he treats his coworkers. Him coming over did make me feel better but we will see if it was sincere or if this behavior happens again. he did thank me for bringing up my feelings and I was glad that I did it since my tendency is to keep things bottled up. But god dammit, did that day suck.
I'm sorry this happened. I think in certain work cultures - sometimes ones contained within a single team - is people get used to how they relate to each other in them, and carry the same attitude over to the rest of their professional interactions.
This is more prevalent among IT (or maybe that's my experience with it). People rarely say 'please' and even fewer say 'thank you' at the end of requests; they just need stuff done, and they treat others as simply the means to get those things done. In most cases it's not even done intentionally, they just don't think about it any more.
For example it would be easy to mistake some of the people at my job as abrupt or even rude. They are not, I've found, but they're so used to treating each other abruptly - say, interrupting one another, not listening at all, communicating poorly, etc - that they can easily come off as jerks. Yet if you get to know them they are not, and in fact they'll bend over backwards to help if you ask for it.
Maybe it's exposure to gaming culture but... being thick skinned helps, I guess. I'm not saying it's a solution, or that times it can't get to me, but there's something about being screamed in all caps at by angry rogues who think they deserved more healing when they stood in the fire that makes me less impressed by a grown-ass neckbeard being abrupt with me on a Monday morning.
- He who takes offense when not intended is a fool. He who takes offense when intended is a greater fool.
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There's also that disconnect between online (Slack/Skype/email) and RL communication.
I'd rather a request in an IM just be a quick 'Could you give me access to X when you get a chance?' vs a lengthy message (or worse: series of messages!). But in person, we do factor in the please and thank you.
Over time, I can see how the former might overtake the latter for some people. It shouldn't, but I can see how it might.
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@auspice Not gonna lie, I think Discord is perhaps the most aptly-named application in recorded history.
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@sockmonkey said in RL Anger:
Him: (exasperated that I didn't just DO IT) You know, add people and edit and .. ADMIN STUFF.
Me: Okay but I already set you as a manager and that allows you to do all that stuf-...
Him: (interrupts) Make me an admin. (walks away)This is maybe petty but after that interaction and knowing that he didn't need it, I wouldn't have set it for him. People like that can enjoy pushing through the red tape to get what they want if they can't manage basic niceness IMHO.
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@sockmonkey said in RL Anger:
Him: (exasperated that I didn't just DO IT) You know, add people and edit and .. ADMIN STUFF.
Me: Okay but I already set you as a manager and that allows you to do all that stuf-...
Him: (interrupts) Make me an admin. (walks away)This is maybe petty but after that interaction and knowing that he didn't need it, I wouldn't have set it for him. People like that can enjoy pushing through the red tape to get what they want if they can't manage basic niceness IMHO.
Yeah this is pretty much what I would have done to, I would have noted his request and sent it through the longest applicable proper channel to get it done.
Same situation and the requester is polite I would do it right away without delay. I have zero qualms about sandbagging assholes with all the bureaucracy whatever employer i have can muster. -
Walgreens. I hate Walgreens. Not for any particular reason other than how cheap they mark down Easter candy after the holiday. Do the same with Valentines Day and Xmas.
I don't need this kind of temptation in my life. I don't need to know how cheap bags of Cadbury mini-eggs are.
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@testament said in RL Anger:
Walgreens. I hate Walgreens. Not for any particular reason other than how cheap they mark down Easter candy after the holiday. Do the same with Valentines Day and Xmas.
I don't need this kind of temptation in my life. I don't need to know how cheap bags of Cadbury mini-eggs are.
I wish you hadn't said that. I have a prescription to pick up there tomorrow.
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@testament said in RL Anger:
Walgreens. I hate Walgreens. Not for any particular reason other than how cheap they mark down Easter candy after the holiday. Do the same with Valentines Day and Xmas.
I don't need this kind of temptation in my life. I don't need to know how cheap bags of Cadbury mini-eggs are.
I wish you hadn't said that. I have a prescription to pick up there tomorrow.
I won't be at a Walgreens until Wednesdya I hate you all
I am there every day except Monday or Tuesday
this isn't fair -
True story. I spent what felt like half the night running around from Walgreens to Walgreens with @EmmahSue, trying to find a pharmacist who would actually provide her with what she needed, and because it was late at night, or maybe because we were two girls together, I don't really know - she was refused more than once. Fuck Walgreens, really.
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Bitches, I'm not asking for syringes for fun. I need to take my motherfucking insulin. Give me the goddamn needles.
When I burst into tears and sobbed about being afraid I'd DIE, the latent Southern Gentleman'ness kicked in and suddenly they believed me.
ES