@arkandel
You make me sound like such a fucking bitch.
Look, it's real simple. I actually take massive amounts of shit from people all the time, patiently and quietly. But when something happens that is abusive or wrong, or I simply don't agree with it, I follow a simple flow-chart of discussion:
1. "I need to talk to you about X. I'm not comfortable with it. Would you please stop doing X? I'd appreciate it."
Simple. Easy. It's at this point that shit should just stop. A simple "okay, I understand" is fine. I don't need an apology or explanation. Just acknowledge that you received the message and stop doing what you're doing. If you want to explain, I'll listen, but that does not mean I'll change my mind. Why? Because if I've addressed the problem, then there is a problem, and know that I don't knee-jerk when it comes to bringing up problems; I've better things to do with my time than make up some petty shit.
2. "Okay, let me rephrase that: stop doing X, or I will make you stop."
Again, simple and easy. This response means that I'm not open to further discussion, if you're debating the pros and cons as to why you are doing what you're doing. Just stop doing X. That's all I'm asking.
3. <insert action here>
If I'm a player, I complain to staff, and I keep on complaining until I get heard, and if the offender isn't shit-canned or disciplined to my satisfaction, I leave. If I'm a staff member, I will request that the game owner/operator permanently eject you, or, at the very least, forbid you from applying back into my sphere of responsibility. And if I'm the game owner/operator, expect a permanent banning.
I apply the same rules with my kids:
- "Honey, would you please stop screaming at the top of your lungs? I don't like it, it's too loud. Thank you."
- "Let me rephrase that: stop screaming now, or you're going to your room."
- "Go to your room." followed by Ganymede walking over, grabbing child, hauling them bodily to their room, and closing their door
My advice: just be clear with your expectations, and hold firm. If other players don't get by that, screw them. People will push and push until they get what you want; when they realize they won't get what they want, they will leave you alone.
I think this is why my IC and OOC relationships with players tend to last for a long time.