Dec 7, 2019, 8:15 AM
dear lord I want this sick to go away but especially this cough. my chest and lungs can't take much more.
Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff
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@surreality said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
I manage to avoid having to people for the vast, vast majority of the year... and yet somehow manage to end up with two art shows on the same day, one picking up right as the other ends.
At least it's just the one day, but holy crap. That's too much adulting and peopling for me in a condensed timeframe.
But your reward is not having to people again on a different day!
Racism isn't Tinkerbell. It doesn't need you to believe in it for it to exist.
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Amazing good life stuff: I just moved into a new place and as far as the physical is concerned, I love it. Nice area, nice apartment, nicely-sized garden. It came utterly barren and unfurnished which is actually a good thing as far as I'm concerned, because I finally get a place I can truly make my own, design/paint it just the way I like it, add a lot of personal touches.
Amazing bad life stuff: It's a Share of Leasehold property which means that while I own the apartment, I don't own the building it's contained in, the ownership of which is shared between the other neighbours, with whom I'm to have semiannual meetings to discuss things like how much money we're going to spend this year on maintaining/refurbishing the garden and outside area etc., and whether there are any present issues with the property. I didn't think this would be a problem when I moved in, because I figured adults would be reasonable, but fuck me, turns out the vast majority of my new neighbours are no-lifer retirees/widows with nothing better to do than gossip, bitch, complain and spy on each other.
So the sweet old lady next-door asked if she could have a key to my garden; reason being that her gardener currently has to pass through her flat to access her garden, whereas my garden has external access, and he could just pass through my garden into hers. I said I'd think about it but after doing so and consulting some more experienced friends, I politely told her I was uncomfortable with this, as while I trust her not to do anything untoward, I don't know/trust her gardener and don't want him to have a key to an area that directly overlooks my bedroom + ensuite bathroom, nor to the glass door to my living room, which I already have security concerns about living in a ground-floor flat. For her it's an inconvenience issue; for me it's a security and privacy issue.
She seemed like such a sweet old lady when I met her, and asked so sweetly, so I thought this would be fine, and she'd politely, Britishly understand and say 'no problem, thought I'd ask'. Except the moment I told her no, she immediately proceeded to flare up and throw an absolute tantrum, yell at and then threaten me.
Well fucking shit. I don't know where to go from here. Do I continue to be polite and offer a compromise (which I was going to before she lost her shit — I was going to suggest I could let her gardener in if she lets me know in advance when to be around to do so) or do I immediately cut off all contact with her and try my best to avoid her? Because she could actually make real trouble for me, due to the terms and conditions of my purchase, and I was not looking forward to making war with the neighbours the second I moved in.
Note to self: Never trust sweet old ladies.
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@Kestrel Look at the bright side. Now you know your neighbor is a nutjob and it cost you nearly nothing to find out. You could have paid a much steeper price.
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@Derp I legitimately don't know if I love or hate this but I heard two people have a deeply sincere conversation about using the mathematical formulae of fractal generators to more deeply connect with 'universal bee energy' and the mathematical wisdom and awareness of bees we have only now started to understand. I don't mean 'we're only now starting to understand the fractal patterns of nature in bee-created structures', they really and truly meant 'bees math so much better than we do, because they math from their very souls'.
Also, the food at that show is good. Really good.
As my husband put it: "Dinner and a show! Could do worse at $25 for a table."
Am leaning toward 'love', because... yes.
Oh fucking well.
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I mean, I'm laughing now at the concept of bee math from the soul unlocking the nature of the universe...
And then I remember that spoilery stuff in Arrival, and realize that one day I'm gonna be the old fogey going 'back in my day, we didn't have any fancy bee math'.
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@Kestrel said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Note to self: Never trust sweet old ladies.
They're all Gingerbread Witches.
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dear lord I want this sick to go away but especially this cough. my chest and lungs can't take much more.
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@Auspice said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
dear lord I want this sick to go away but especially this cough. my chest and lungs can't take much more.
Have you been eating clover-honey? You can buy it at the grocery store. Just put a spoonful in your mouth and let it melt.
It coats your throat and relieves your cough. The honey is a mild anti-biotic as well but more importantly, you can lube your throat up with it as much as you want and just work off the extra calories when you are healthy. -
Update:
The crazy fucking bitch BROKE MY GARDEN DOOR. From the outside. With PHYSICAL FORCE.
I’m getting a lawyer involved.
Also booking a contractor pronto to wall off the entire garden before she gets any ideas about that fence.
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@Kestrel said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Update:
The crazy fucking bitch BROKE MY GARDEN DOOR. From the outside. With PHYSICAL FORCE.
I’m getting a lawyer involved.
Also booking a contractor pronto to wall off the entire garden before she gets any ideas about that fence.
Make sure you go by your local courthouse tomorrow and take out a restraining order.
Then if she shows up at your house you can call the cops on her.
Also, your lawyer will love it so you can claim emotional damages if you go to court.
He can say you felt threatened and had to involve the law.
Just do it before you hire the lawyer. Makes it seem more legit. -
@Carex said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Kestrel said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Update:
The crazy fucking bitch BROKE MY GARDEN DOOR. From the outside. With PHYSICAL FORCE.
I’m getting a lawyer involved.
Also booking a contractor pronto to wall off the entire garden before she gets any ideas about that fence.
Make sure you go by your local courthouse tomorrow and take out a restraining order.
Then if she shows up at your house you can call the cops on her.
Also, your lawyer will love it so you can claim emotional damages if you go to court.
He can say you felt threatened and had to involve the law.Yeah, a restraining order was the next step I was thinking of because I didn’t “feel” threatened, I 100% was threatened, a number of times, with implications of blackmail and then actually breaking and entering was one hell of a step too far.
I’m just trying to think if that’s too much?
Ugh. I just moved in. Been loving it so far. It sucks to find out that my neighbour’s a nutjob in under two weeks flat.
At this point I don’t even think any kind of communication with her that doesn’t have a lawyer involved is worth it. If she’s willing to do this, no amount of civil dialogue is going to do jack.
On a MUSH, this would be solved with a nice clean ban.
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The nice thing about restraining orders is that when the cops come and take the nut-jobs away they can keep them in jail for 24 hours as a cool-down period. If you don't have a restraining order the cops just have to make sure the crazy person leaves the property but they can come right back as soon as the cops drive off.
Once she's in jail her family has to get involved.
This is a roundabout way of making her family work for you.
Once they realize she's going to end up in jail if she keeps this shit up, her own family becomes your personal police force, working for free, to keep her in line. Court fees are expensive. They will police her for you to avoid them.Also, remember, once she is inside your house you can shoot her dead. Just make sure she is fully inside the residence. If you have a restraining order out on her and she breaks into your home, you have a license to kill.
Just finish the job. Shoot her at least three times at range, wait about a minute, call 911 while she bleeds out, try to sound like you're confused and in shock.
Don't let yourself feel like there is nothing you can do. If she fucks with you, you have all the power.
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@Carex said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Kestrel
Also, remember, once she is inside your house you can shoot her dead. Just make sure she is fully inside the residence. If you have a restraining order out on her and she breaks into your home, you have a license to kill.Just finish the job. Shoot her at least three times at range, wait about a minute, call 911 while she bleeds out, try to sound like you're confused and in shock.
You scare me
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We don't have guns here.
But I can live vicariously through your sick, deranged fantasies. Thank you. These are now my own.
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@Kestrel said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
On a MUSH, this would be solved with a nice clean ban.
So I don't know the law where you live, but since you said this is an association owned house, that means the possibility exists of her being evicted if she is sufficiently disruptive.
Where I live it takes quite a lot to reach that point as long as theyre paying their fees on time, but breaking and entering into your neighbors sounds up there.
You might want to talk with the association board, maybe this isnt her first time doing this kind of thing.
What is obvious to you may not be obvious to me and vice versa.
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@Carex said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Also, remember, once she is inside your house you can shoot her dead. Just make sure she is fully inside the residence. If you have a restraining order out on her and she breaks into your home, you have a license to kill.
This isn't even the legal standard in every US state, much less abroad. Don't give legal advice like this if you aren't a lawyer. It's exceptionally dangerous for the person who is relying on your word, and, assuming you're an American, it opens you up to liability of your own.
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@JinShei said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Carex said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Kestrel
Also, remember, once she is inside your house you can shoot her dead. Just make sure she is fully inside the residence. If you have a restraining order out on her and she breaks into your home, you have a license to kill.Just finish the job. Shoot her at least three times at range, wait about a minute, call 911 while she bleeds out, try to sound like you're confused and in shock.
You scare me
That is not true in every state or every situation.
Best not.
Racism isn't Tinkerbell. It doesn't need you to believe in it for it to exist.
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@Derp said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@JinShei said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Carex said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Kestrel
Also, remember, once she is inside your house you can shoot her dead. Just make sure she is fully inside the residence. If you have a restraining order out on her and she breaks into your home, you have a license to kill.Just finish the job. Shoot her at least three times at range, wait about a minute, call 911 while she bleeds out, try to sound like you're confused and in shock.
You scare me
That is not true in every state or every situation.
Best not.
I'll be over here, in the UK.. Being scared of different things.
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@Groth said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Kestrel said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
On a MUSH, this would be solved with a nice clean ban.
So I don't know the law where you live, but since you said this is an association owned house, that means the possibility exists of her being evicted if she is sufficiently disruptive.
Where I live it takes quite a lot to reach that point as long as theyre paying their fees on time, but breaking and entering into your neighbors sounds up there.
You might want to talk with the association board, maybe this isnt her first time doing this kind of thing.
Yeah, so here's the thing. The neighbours convene annually to elect/reelect the board of directors for the company which owns the building (which is the neighbours, it's all very Marxist). I was present at the December meeting to vote on the 2020 cycle where she was nominated — at which point someone turned to me and asked if I'd like to second, and I shrugged and said, sure, I'll second. (Again, she seemed like such a sweet old lady at the time.) So uh, yeah. Yikes. She has all the power here, which is why I'm getting a lawyer involved without delay. I don't think this is going to be solved with civil dialogue given she's already jumped to such extreme measures over something so small. Shit like this is major red flag behaviour.
Among her threats — my lease contract says I'm allowed pets under the condition that I clean up after them and don't cause a nuisance to the neighbours. This is a term I fought to have added prior to purchasing the property because there's no other reason I'd want to live in a ground-floor garden flat. So she said she'd complain about the animal I haven't even gotten yet over this; I've been eagerly waiting to move house before adopting a new one, after my bestie passed last year.
@JinShei said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Derp said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@JinShei said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Carex said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
@Kestrel
Also, remember, once she is inside your house you can shoot her dead. Just make sure she is fully inside the residence. If you have a restraining order out on her and she breaks into your home, you have a license to kill.Just finish the job. Shoot her at least three times at range, wait about a minute, call 911 while she bleeds out, try to sound like you're confused and in shock.
You scare me
That is not true in every state or every situation.
Best not.
I'll be over here, in the UK.. Being scared of different things.
I'm not sure this counts as Health & Wealth & GrownUp Stuff but in other news the upcoming election is seriously affecting my mental health. I'm looking forward to it all being over, one way or another.
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I am anticipating a horrific Christmas since my parents are visiting for the first time in forever and my mom is being weirder than usual. However, at least this time they are staying in a hotel which means we wont have to purchase a hotel room just in case we need to kick them out, so that has lessened my stress a bit. I think I wasnt supposed to accept them staying at the hotel, since my dad immediately got a little pissy when I said that was great, and the hotel was really cute (it's the in-laws favorite). Oh well.