Wildly Out of Context
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"Do we care about the stripper contacts?"
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@Derp said in Wildly Out of Context:
@Killer-Klown said in Wildly Out of Context:
Said to me, rather than something I said.
"No, it's not a sex toy. It's my sister."I really want to know the context behind this one, lol.
Hee. Ok. So. We're hanging out on our usual Friday Night shenanigans. Friend of mine has his phone on silent, but it's the kind of phone that vibrates in a rhythm similiar to whatever ring tone he had it set to. He gets a call, and the phone starts to ... pulse, amplified by the fact that it's sitting on the table. I called out 'Hey, someone lose their vibrator?" To which his response was... the above.
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"I'm gonna ask a question and I don't care what the answer is-"
"8."
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Heard twice verbatim yesterday:
Parent: "That game is called cornhole."
Child: "Why?"
Parent: <sudden extremely awkward silence> -
"I don't trust cheese that comes in a block."
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"Feel my fingertips, John!"
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"I've got zip ties, I've got fishing line, and I've got certain skills."
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"You know nothing about politics!"
(Yelled by a 7 year old to an 8 year old as we walk across the playground returning from our trip to the public library. I want to know the context but didn't get to ask as I was promptly distracted by another kid eating trash....)
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Receptionist: "Was it the gnome?"
Security Guard: "Don't know, they were gone by the time we got there."What
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"poop with trump in it" <-- found in the browser history of one of my students.
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@silverfox I mean... how much context do you really need??
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I want to know why this 8 year old out of the blue googled it!
I mean. She also googled, poop, trees, nekid girls, and hamsters. Why did the president suddenly appear!
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Welcome! We have bacon and pickle juice for new members.
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"Again, 99 problems and the trolley isn't one of them."
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"Every jacket's a party jacket if I've got it on."
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@silverfox Why does Trump, suddenly appear... whenever poop is near~
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@Auspice said in Wildly Out of Context:
"Every jacket's a party jacket if I've got it on."
I have definitely played that character.
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"I read a lot of urban legends on it. Nic Cage does it."
"...Nic Cage is Santa?"
"That's why he did Face/Off. To show how he can change his face." -
I was just handed two pieces of rusted metal with bits of shoe-leather on each side. "Hold these for me, but not forever, I want them back."
I don't think I even want to know.
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From my office slack, literally just now:
" 'The wives of men of rank when they die are not given at once to be embalmed, nor such women as are very beautiful or of greater regard than others, but on the third or fourth day after their death (and not before) they are delivered to the embalmers. They do so about this matter in order that the embalmers may not abuse their women, for they say that one of them was taken once doing so to the corpse of a woman lately dead, and his fellow-craftsman gave information.'
-Herodotos"
"Because a 3-4 day deceased body is less appealing than a fresh one.."
"If it hasn't been embalmed yet, yeah, you're looking at some pretty unfortunate bloating and discoloration at that point"
