Emotional bleed

[GangOfDolls]

@tek said in Emotional bleed:

@GangOfDolls Now to be fair, in the right setting with the right oversight, that could be helpful. However, a recreational game with people who didn't sign up to facilitate your therapy is NOT the place for that shit.

I generally tend to take a harder line in that I don't think it's generally ever healthy to do this, from my point of view. The therapeutic process requires a lot of oversight that you can't get in a game setting.

But more over, if you're doing this in a game setting, then you're doing it while interacting with other players and whether they know it or not, that's really not a fair position to put anyone in. Even if they consent to it because I don't believe this is actually something anyone can fundamentally consent to because the underpinnings of it are unethical. It doesn't make anyone a bad person. It just makes it a bad action.

This is different just exploring a thing. Exploration of human behavior and meaning is way different.

[Ghost]

Not that I'd want someone to OUT themselves (seriously, please don't), but I don't know of anyone who actually works in the psychiatric community who plays in these games. I feel like a therapist telling someone to go out in the wild in this hobby to roleplay through something as a proxy sounds like a really risky thing to tell a client to do given the pitfalls that can come with other players. IMO I don't think a therapist would immerse themselves in this hobby, regardless. Stuff like tennis and supporting your local sports team is a lot more healthy per dose by percentage.

100% please...never roleplay something personally cathartic to address your RL issues. 150% never do so without consent of the other player. If player consents, please refer to 100% don't.

[tek]

@GangOfDolls Right, I think we're saying the same thing. With appropriate oversight in a therapeutic setting is different than on a MU or in a LARP.

[GangOfDolls]

@tek

[L. B. Heuschkel]

@GangOfDolls said in Emotional bleed:

This is different just exploring a thing. Exploration of human behavior and meaning is way different.

Those are very different things. One is a thought experiment -- say, what would it be like to be a gay sailor in 1930s London, or whatever. The other is a potential meltdown in the making, because even when therapy is wildly successful, therapy hurts.

[Pyrephox]

@Ghost Background in counseling here, and no, it's not something a good therapist would ever suggest. There is a lot of research out there on therapeutic roleplaying, and even online therapy using avatars/platforms like Second Life.

But it's definitely not even close to wandering through a game and putting your issues out there. That said; it's not that a game can't occasionally give you some perspective, or help you develop as a person! Just like reading a book or watching a movie/show can help people grapple with or understand something about themselves, this is an organic process that happens.

But that process is very different from deliberately drawing other people into your self-therapy.

[tek]

tl;dr consent, motherfuckers

[Aria]

Here. I fixed it.

[SilentHills]

Hi, MU*er with various shades of mental illness checking in:

I am an emotional RPer. If you know me personally, or if you just read this past statement and are banking on stereotypes, I guess this shouldn't be a shock.

This doesn't make me a bad person. It doesn't mean that I'm going to get obsessed with you, boil your bunny rabbit, tell people that you're a dick for something that happened IC when you were very kind OOC about it - just communicate with me.

Given the events of Jules being a manipulative and abusive asshole IC and OOC, I still get upset. If you want to play a mean character with me, that's fine. But when I'm playing v. mean on Svana these days, I will try to check on the people she's been a bitch to. Sometimes I get a response, sometimes I don't.

Of course, someone will argue with me and say that no one should talk OOC EVER because that's a HUGE part of the problem but you know, it's a suggestion, and one I personally find helpful with my compounded issues. So that's my take.

[Kanye Qwest]

lol never trust anything that bleeds for days and doesn't die amirite. Emotionally or OTHERWISE.

[Herja]

@Kanye-Qwest Once, a guy I was going out on a date with showed up in a t-shirt saying that. That was an interesting date.

[saosmash]

@Herja Did he live?

[Kanye Qwest]

@saosmash said in Emotional bleed:

@Herja Did he live?

don't answer that, that's exactly the kind of question a cop would ask

[Herja]

He lived. I just spent the entire date drinking cocktails on his dime and roasting him subtly until the end of the date when he got fresh and I got really unsubtle about it.

[Ganymede]

@Herja

That's a shame.

[Gingerlily]

@Herja said in Emotional bleed:

He lived. I just spent the entire date drinking cocktails on his dime and roasting him subtly until the end of the date when he got fresh and I got really unsubtle about it.

'Got Fresh'. You are Sandra Dee over here.

[TurtleStraw]

Am I old or do we not wear collared shirts on dates anymore?

[Herja]

My aesthetic is Sandy from Grease after Frenchie gives her a makeover and she very awkwardly is smoking a cigarette.

So, yeah. Pretty much.

[il-volpe]

@Jeshin said in Emotional bleed:

Integrity of the story, not individual integrity. The shared suspension of disbelief. Obviously people have feelings and one of the reasons there's such a culture of don't do it finger wagging (I think) is because of the final question.

Mmm. I would not describe it as 'integrity' but there's a thing.

For shared suspension of disbelief, we need all the players to understand the game-world consistently with one another. We also tend to like a consistent emotional tone to the game. We call the mix 'theme', right? Pop fiction IPs work great because lots of people will already know what the game's universe is like, and also things like where the overall comedy/action/angst/coziness levels can be expected to lie.

What the hobby doesn't seem to have done is find a consistent way to communicate the OOC version of this. 'Community theme'? A "we're a serious bunch trying to tell a grim and complex story, and this tale holds priority" makes a very different MU from "We're goofing off and if we make a great story that's awesome but everybody having a good time is priority." Plus a lot of points in between, plus, "Core players having a good time telling their cool and complex story is priority, we'll fuck up that story to cater to their feelings, but not yours."

What your game is like in this community-thing regard probably makes a huge difference as to what bleed even is, as well as how to handle it.