RL Anger
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@Auspice I'm game. Mine is fixed. It's a relatively safe plan.
(Which is exactly how I talk to my friends who are parents of teenage girls, being the parent of a teenage boy)
No bullshit, I said this to my friend Peggy last week:
"So that we can remain friends, could you please never let your 16 year old daughter know we have a 17 year old son? We need to keep that a closely guarded secret."
Delete the Hog Pit. It'll be fun.
I really don't understand He-Man -
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@Ghost It could be something totally different. Like, when I'm asleep, my cat sleeps in my chair. When I wake up, I go sit in my chair to all the kitty side-eye glare she can lazily muster.
So, technically speaking, your cat could actually be all like, "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE I PLANNED TO LICK MYSELF TO MAURY TODAY YOU JERK AND I'M TOO SELF-CONSCIOUS FOR THAT SHIT WHEN YOU'RE HOME WHEN ARE YOU LEAVING?!"
Oh fucking well.
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@surreality said in RL Anger:
WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE I PLANNED TO LICK MYSELF TO MAURY TODAY
Answer?
BECAUSE I AM WHERE I PLAN TO LICK MYSELF TO MAURY TODAY.
Delete the Hog Pit. It'll be fun.
I really don't understand He-Man -
@Ghost oh sweet jeebus I actually choked on a muffin at that
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@surreality said in RL Anger:
WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE I PLANNED TO LICK MYSELF TO MAURY TODAY
Answer?
BECAUSE I AM WHERE I PLAN TO LICK MYSELF TO MAURY TODAY.
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This post is deleted! -
I didn't get nearly enough sleep last night, and I have a quarterly (actually, like it's been half a year?) review today. I am dreading it, because I haven't been doing all that great in the last month at my job. Can I hide somewhere?
#FreeFarfalla
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Peeve No. 1:
E-mail: "So, based on responses, we have openings on August 3 and August 7 for depositions. Which one works best?"
Response: "I put that date on my calendar."Me at desk: WHICH FUCKING DATE THERE ARE TWO OF THEM DIPSHIT?
Peeve No. 2:
Me: "Honey, have you seen my keys?"
Partner: from the other room "It's over there."Me in head: WHERE THE FUCK IS 'THERE'?
Peeve No. 3:
Me: "So, where did you want to go for dinner tonight?"
Partner: "Oh, I don't know. You pick."Me in head: THE FUCK IT IS WOMAN YOU VETO EVERY GODDAMN PLACE I LIKE EVERY FUCKING TIME.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
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Me: "Honey, have you seen my keys?"
Partner: from the other room "It's over there."
Me in head: WHERE THE FUCK IS 'THERE'?^OMFG THIS
Not to mention:
ME: I lost my keys, can u help?
SO: (not looking) Where was the last place you saw them?
ME: Right where I am right now. I just looked there.
SO: Where was the last place you saw them before that?
ME: IF RETRACING MY STEPS WERE SOME MYSTIC ART I HADN'T THOUGHT OF IN THE FIRST PLACE, OR HAD IT YIELDED ANY RESULTS, I WOULDN'T BE ASKING FOR HELP. -
Conversely, I hate when people are like HELP ME FIND THING I HAVE LOOKED EVERYWHERE*
You go lift up three things and find them under one of them. LOOK UNDER THINGS FOR FUCK'S SAKE.
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@Ganymede I think you'll find one answer in this helpful facebook post:
#FreeFarfalla
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ME: Have you seen my glasses?
EX: [starts laughing histerically]
ME: Oh, fuck you. [wipes glasses] -
Women who don't sound insane are really fucking boring, and aren't fooling anyone.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
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@Ganymede WELL YOU'RE IN LUCK, BOO.
(the joke there implying that i sound insane? or that i'm really fucking boring. idk. I've had a lot of caffeine today.)
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Some men do the dinner thing, too.
If I'm asked 'What do you want?' if I don't have a specific preference, my answer usually at least has guidelines, depending on the state of my stomach. Like, 'I can't handle greasy stuff today.'
But my ex-husband loved to force me to 'choose'. So it'd become this series of:
Me: 'Ok let's go to...'
Him: 'No.'
Me: 'What about-'
Him: 'I hate that place.'and so on until I finally get to whatever he actually wanted.
And then the next time we see our friends, he'd go on about how difficult I make picking a place to eat. Men do it, too. (and then the major assholes still pin it on the woman.)
Saying the quiet parts out loud since 1996.
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@Auspice Yeah, my workspouse actually does this too a lot. Not a gendered thing.
Basically, we all as humans suck at feeding ourselves. Too many choices.
#FreeFarfalla
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David and I have worked out a system.
Me: Food.
David: Continent?
Me: Thinking Asia.
David: Asia is good. Left part or right part?
Me: Right part.
David: Chinese, curry, sushi?
Me: Curry, Chinese, Sushi. (Order of preference).
David: Delivery or roadtrip?
Me: Anything under thirty bucks. Make it so.
David: does magic -
Basically, we all as humans suck at feeding ourselves. Too many choices.
No, no. This is wrong.
We're very good at feeding ourselves.
We're not as good in predicting what others may want.
We really shouldn't give a shit because adults should be able to obtain their own food.
But, no. We insist on partnerships and shit.
Because we're stupid.
Endut.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
