Best posts made by Aria

The barista in my building knows I'm super sick but too swamped to miss work, so she ran a lemonade through the steamer to heat it up, tossed in two mint tea bags, and handed me a fistful of honey packets.

you, Doreen.

So @insomniac7809 and I, after almost 11 years together, have finally decided to get hitched. Thus far we have:

-Picked a venue (not halfway in-between all our relatives, but at a place that reduces travel time by 3+ hours for all our relatives in the Midwest, and which ADDS 3+ hours of travel for.... the bride and groom and almost all our friends)

-Set a date (on a Saturday, near no major holidays or other people's celebrations!)

-Ordered a prospective wedding dress

And I already have family members complaining about things they don't like. How about you fuck off, Aunt Karen?

@Alamias said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

We got a bit of flack and hurt feelings from the people that we didn't tell right away, but tough shit for them...we had a limited budget and didn't invite the world.

Ding.

The average price of a traditional wedding in our city is up to something like $45,000. I can't even book a full day photographer for less than $4,000. Sorry we're not willing to wipe out most of my 401k or take out a loan the size of my student debt so I can meet some bullshit expectations for one day??

Ceci n'est pas un scrotum.

It's a hedgehog. A bald hedgehog. It's so hideous it's cute again, like pugs. I can't stop laughing.

(Also, yes. I did just make an art history joke about nutsacks. You're welcome.)

Dear Colleagues --

Tomorrow is my last day in this role, a fact which was announced to our entire department and several of our business partners two weeks ago now. So no, no I'm really not up for "helping" you by handling the logistics for an event happening at the end of June.

Additionally, while I am so glad to hear that you're happy for me, I have also noticed the little note of panic that appears in your voice whenever you're reminded that you may have to do all of tasks that weren't supposed to be a part of my duties but which you were Way Too Busy with Super Important Things to handle. But don't worry too much! I'll be leaving you links to the intranet guides on how to do all of those tasks that you didn't take seriously these last four years. I'm sure you'll figure it out, by which I mean find someone else to grossly undervalue even after you screw it up yourself three or four times.

Finally, Denyse -- yes you, specifically -- while you're right that it is very exciting that I'm being moved to the team rolling out the new processes and methodologies that are being launched company-wide and it's going to be great to be on such a high-profile project, you have literally never said a single word to me in the course of my time in this department except when you wanted me to do something for you. No, I would not like to go to lunch and tell you all about the process for getting my project management certification or for any other ass-kissing you've suddenly decided to take upon yourself.

Kindly fuck all the way off.

Sincerely,
Me

My doggo in his wedding "tux" from last weekend.

@Auspice said in Good or New Movies Review:

I think one of the few cases in recent years where a company truly made strides as opposed to 'just slap a rainbow on it and make us some $$$' was Target. Because they took a holistic approach to inclusivity. You can find cards at a Target specifically for gay or lesbian relationships, not just 'eh, put some neutral cards out; those will work' type stuff. They acknowledged 'A wife may want a card for her wife' or 'People may want to wish both grooms congratulations' and saw it through.

I think, for a lot of people, that's the sort of thing they want to see. Sure, it's fun to have rainbow mouse ears if you go to Disney, but if that's all they have to offer, it sort of stings too to know that it wasn't worth the effort of putting any more thought into it than 'rainbow stuff = $$$'

As someone who spent years working in marketing organizations, the inclusivity of Target's advertisements was a big deal in the industry. Like, even though I worked at pharmaceutical and financial companies for ten years, it was pretty standard for Target to drop their Christmas toy catalog and find copies of it floating around my office within a few days, with every page that depicted people with physical disabilities, interracial relationships, a nod to their ethnicity, plus sized models, or families headed by same-sex couples with their pages turned down for people to look at -- and not just to steal ideas, but because they honestly enjoyed looking at the catalog.

Honestly, it's probably one of the most wholesome things I've ever seen in a business context because people wanted to improve our advertisements not just for the $$$, but because they were sincerely emotional every time one of their coworkers got all worked up and excited about seeing someone in that book that looked like them and their family. And if you do that enough, it stops feeling like a throwaway and starts looking like real life.

I have six competing priorities all due for the end of this week. And bless my primary business partner, because when I told him and my boss about this and how strained I am this week, he sent out an email to his entire team, my boss, her boss, and my entire team that basically said:

"Aria is a wonderful resource and we are lucky to have her! She is also entirely too nice to say to any of us, so I'm going to say no for her. She has several high level and complex priorities due at the end of the week, which are:

<bullet points>

Let's all help her do her best work by not adding anything to her plate or making asks that are unrelated to those things."

My boss and her boss were both super thrilled, pushed one of those things to Monday, then told the groups I'm working with on two of them that the heavy lifting is on them until items #1-3 get done and too bad for them if they don't like that.

I have literally never had managers do something like this for me before. I am simultaneously super grateful and wondering if I maybe somehow stole someone else's life. If I did, screw them. I'm not giving it back.

@GreenFlashlight said in RL things I love:

@Auspice said in RL things I love:

@Aria said in RL things I love:

I'm not sure which I find funnier and/or more terrifying -- them thinking that's actually how any of it works or that a bunch of people looked at these assholes and went, "By golly, they really seem to have things together. We should elect them to Be In Charge."

You forgot option 3: that someone actually married them.

Women willingly marrying men is the best argument I have against the idea that sexual orientation is a choice.

Me: <snort-sprays water while laughing>
Husband: What's funny?
Me: <reads post>
Husband: ....Okay, I kind feel attacked.
Me: By the post or by me finding it that funny?
Husband: Kinda both.
Me: <laughs harder>

A public service announcement, brought to you by your resident Changeling GM:

Rob Lowe got so bored, he did a Tiger King cosplay from his house.

Rob Lowe is a goddamn treasure.

@RightMeow said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

Today's peeve ---

My anxiety and what I do to myself. -- So I guess my peeve is myself?

People will say I'm upset at X behavior. Or X happened and I'm upset.

My Brain: I immediately go -- OMG it's me. They hate me. Should I apologize? Wait, what if they dont want to talk to me and then that's harassing. Oh no. I said a thing and got no reply, I overstepped. QUICK apologize. No wait, should I leave it be? AGGGHHHH

My logic: Umm.. you haven't talked to that person. That is not even in your behavior pattern. It cannot in any conceivable way be you.

My brain: But what if it IS my behavior pattern and I just don't recognize it because I'm behavior blind:

My logic: ....

My logic: So xanax or shots?

As I have often explained, it's deeply aggravating to both be intelligent and/or self-aware and to have a psychiatric disorder. Especially because people are like "Oooooooooooooh! Your brain is shiny and does the smart things!", without realizing it can do that and also malfunction on a fundamental level.

Yes, I am perfectly well aware that the thing my brain is doing right now is not only illogical, but in fact counterproductive. That doesn't mean I can make it stop doing the thing. Or that the coping strategy which I've developed is remotely healthy or helpful. That isn't how this works. That isn't how any of this works and believe me, person who is looking at me like I'm crazypants. You're right. I am. I know that. And I am even more frustrated with this dumb pile of goo between my ears than you are.

TL;DR - Muttering "ohmigod, why are you like this?!?" at yourself is a larger part of mental illness than you might think.

@Cassite said in The Work Thread:

@Aria That actually really helped me to hear, if nothing else.

That's the thing. It's perspective and I think that this far into it, and with this much longer to go, a lot of us are losing that. Especially my friends with kids who are not handling this well because a) kids and b) seriously, who is handling this well?

Everything has to be adjusted to take circumstances into account right. Everything.

But for parents who might be feeling guilty, especially moms who always get the pressure to be 'perfect':

Are you taking the precautions you need to in order to keep your kid alive through this shitshow? Do they have a safe place to sleep? Do they have food to eat? Are you trying your best to make this less awful for them?

A+ pandemic parenting. Everything else is extra credit.

You are hereby absolved of a small sliver of guilt, by the power vested in me as a total stranger on an internet forum normally full of people judging you.

So insomniac and I stopped to help at the scene of a pretty nasty car accident on our way home.

The driver wasn't wearing his seatbelt. Literally the only reason he didn't go through his windshield, which was crushed up against the guardrail across his entire front end, was because all of his airbags deployed.

WEAR YOUR FUCKING SEATBELTS, GUYS.