Posts made by Faceless

I've kept quiet about it because I'm not often one to throw my real world issues off on the shoulders of others. This is by no means any sort of 'call for help' or the like. I help myself. We help ourselves. This is just my venting so that I don't end up following through with a wish to pay a visit to someone's home.

My wife, as many have likely gathered, is the cheddar-maker in our household. I'm the stay-at-home parent. Quite a few have likely also heard me talk about how much she loves her job, because she really, really does.

She was fired about a week and a half ago. Long story short: her boss, who had filled her head with all this talk of her becoming the Director(which essentially functions as the Vice President of that respective department)(i.e., her boss's current position) realized that the timetable that she presented for the promotions to be passed around, was flawed. She realized, in short, that she'd probably not be promoted for a long, long time. Largely because she just wasn't very good at her job. In fact Mrs. Faceless was more likely to leap frog or outright replace her.

Since Bad Boss began her job about two years ago, there has been two controversial firings within her department, that were her doing. At one point she informed my wife that "this is what she does; she treats someone she doesn't like shit until they quit or they give her a good reason to fire them". This also had the side effect of her doing it so that she could get people from her previous employer to come over and join her team at her current employer(i.e., my wife's place of employment).

So about a month ago there was some mistakes in processes that were made. My wife was given the blame. Was it her fault? No. It was one of the people under her that screwed up, but as is expected the fire burnt up the rope. When my wife was asked why what happened, happened, she was honest: I was told to do it by my immediate management. This prompted Bad Boss to initiate termination protocols. She made my wife's life hell for a couple weeks, up to and including pulling her into a private meeting to inform her sweetly that she was "pretentious" and "walk around here like you're Mrs. Faceless Fucking McFacelessface". It became a situation where Mrs. Faceless was sent into walking on egg shells because Bad Boss had become overly critical of everything. She stayed over 15 minutes one night to ensure every last shred of her duties were completed, so that she could get a fresh start on a new project the next day. Something which she's done periodically for nearly 3 years. Bad Boss took exception to this Go-Getter attitude suddenly and made it a point to chastise her diligence.

So she ended up getting fired for "insubordination". In what way or how? I've no damn idea, mostly because I know it didn't happen. I do know that I had a couple ideas that involved limb breaking, until I was reminded that my pictures had been all over her desk. An oversight. Chick needs to keep me off her grid, duh.

NOW...

She had two interviews and one job offer within an hour of losing her job. When I say my wife is the hardest working person that I personally know? It's not an embellishment or some weird flattery that she'll never see. I have zero doubts that she'll find another place to work, even if she has to take a bit of a pay hit. What angers me is the fact she lost her job or career that I know she loved, because her immediate supervisor felt threatened in their own position because they recognized that they're bad at their job. When she was confronted with the allegations, she denied them of course.

She's had a number of interviews since the separation from her previous employer. Today? Today I'm the most hopeful. I like money. It makes my junk wiggle. The position she's interviewing for today would ultimately result in a $20k increase over what she was making previously. I kind of want her to get and take this, because if so? It'll make all the headache and frustration she's felt since being fired from a place that she loved, seem worth it. For her sake, I hope she gets it because I think it'll make her appreciate the opportunity for something new.

Alternatively, she was just offered another job that while it would actually involve a slight pay cut over her previous employment; it would be with a company that has apparently won some award for being the best employer in the city the past six years or something and have a lot more bonus opportunities over what she had available previously so it would likely even out or put her slightly above her past earnings.

This is only a matter of concern to me because I know she'll ask my advice when or if she gets offered both positions. One seems a safer bet and would likely result in her having a happier experience. The other one... more money, but an uncertain environment. So I'm sort of adrift on which direction to advise her, when she comes asking.

So, in short, fuck you Bad Boss. You literally got rid of someone who was doing the duties of four people. Your department was so under budget because she was doing the work of four people in total, at the pay of one and a half. She's heard from literally a couple dozen of her former coworkers or subordinates how much chaos, confusion, and general lack of progress there's been since her firing. People now placed in jobs that they weren't prepared for, unable to answer questions or just get the job done in general. You tried to "knock her down a peg", but it didn't work. Chick's Obi-Wan, yo. She'll just come back stronger than you could possibly imagine. You've played yourself. It's my genuine hope that someone breaks your goddamn legs, you lying fuck.

/venting

@kanye-qwest said in Staff and ethics:

@faceless I'm never trying to get a last punch in on the bannings board, I don't think. Now i have to go re-read them.

No, no. That's not a statement directed at you specifically. It's a generalized cautionary mention. Because I've seen it happen in past games. Sorry for the confusion. Looking back I can see how you'd link one statement to another, with the mention of you scrunched in between them.

"Jim was banned because he's a creepy shit and was harassing another player."

It just comes off as excessive and as if staff has some sort of personal investment or even making the banning seem personal. When they could just state the facts, without the need to make it seem personal.

"Jim was banned because he was harassing another player, repeatedly, in pages. This is a warning to anyone else that wants to send multiple pictures of Dick Van Dyke and does not stop when asked."

@arkandel said in Staff and ethics:

So while we're on the subject of rules... do you think it's better for staff to create a detailed set of policies, or keep it to generic "don't be an asshole" guidelines?

That's so vague that sometimes it hurts. Much like The Reach's "Be Excellent To Each Other" policy. I get it. It's a sensible rule to the average person. To MUers who, more often than not, are pedantic wanna-be lawyers(or actual lawyers, in some cases)? Yeah, I'd just air on the side of caution and spell it out as clearly as I'm able.

Should you necessarily have to go into the tedium? Almost certainly not. With many MUers(sometimes myself included) however, you need to be hyper-specific with the expectations. Being appropriately vague and overly thorough each has their respective place, sometimes at the exact same time. In dealing with the frequent imaginary fun-time hobbyist, I tend to air on the side of thorough and/or specific. It offers less room for the more abusive elements of the MUing world to try to play language-lawyer.

As a staffer advised me a few months back: many people don't grasp nuance in text.

So when it comes down to a question of whether you have a generalized blanket policy or go into the tedium of specifics?

I. Harassment will not be tolerated... (generalized statement)

• This includes harassment based on sex, religion, goat-loving, etc, etc, etc. (specific)
• If another player asks you not to page them and you continue? This is harassment. (specific)
• If you are repeatedly asked not to send pictures of Dick Van Dyke to another player and continue to do so after receiving a warning, you will be banned for harassment. (specific)
• If Player A is asked not to page, whisper, or otherwise contact Player B and Player C contacts Player B on the behalf of Player A? Player A and C will be banned for circumventing anti-harassment measures. (specific) (this would also require some sort of public declaration that Player A should not be contacting Player B)

As previously mentioned rules are meant to protect players and the game itself. Being general and working your way down into the specifics increases that protection in a very clear way. Can every possible scenario be covered? Nooooo. Harassers, abusers, and the rest are creative. Take away their lighter and they'll put a couple safety pins in an electrical socket, heat those bastards up, get some toilet paper, and light their cigarette that way. Being general and providing specific examples though? Provides the rake or the net that is designed to handle a lot of your commonly encountered issues that arise within the hobby.

@darinelle said in Staff and ethics:

I love the Bannings board on Arx.

I think it's a good thing. Because when the hammer is dropped, it sends a very clear message. Paraphrasing what @Kanye-Qwest said previously: it creates a very clear stance, with no uncertain terms. The only thing that needs to ultimately be kept in mind is that it shouldn't be seen as some board for staff(on any game using a ban board) to get some 'last punch' in or, more likely in the case of most games and most staff groups, reveals inconsistency in punishment(s).

The humor of receiving an especially nasty paper cut within the first few pages of a book titled The Blade Itself isn't lost on me.

@aria said in RL Anger:

.....I live in the Northeast. It's 42* right now and I don't have the heat on. In fact, I had the windows cracked -- just a little -- when it was 50* and sunny all day. My car windows while driving in to work today, too.

An office set to 84* sounds like a circle of hell to me.

I'm still wearing shorts and flippie floppies at 44°. I feel like I understand you a little more.

@sockmonkey said in Sockmonkey's Playlist:

@Faceless Daaaaaayne!

I miss Dayne, a lot. I think Cressida and... Jimena? Were the only people he felt weird trying to flirt with. Everything else was basically fair game because more often than not, Dayne was high out of his mind on cocaine and greatness, so he rarely really knew what was going on.

Ah, Cressida. She was a lot of fun! I actually still remember the very first scene that I encountered her with while I was playing Dayne. Awkward and fun. It was great!

@bored said in Regarding administration on MSB:

The issue is that the new framework does not create a space where someone can say "This game is bad, it just is, I'm not being constructive, you can't fix it, you shouldn't even consider playing there, here's why, I repeat it's really terrible, plz no just no" and have that visible to the general public.

@faceless said in Regarding administration on MSB:

The Hog Pit is precisely where negative reviews can (and often do) go. Take off the opt-in feature. The responsibility for not clicking content with clear warnings can be on the user's end. "But I don't want to see bad things said about me/friends/people/etc!!", "So don't click it. You are presumably an adult with free will."

ETA: An opportunity to use Jeff Goldblum.

@bored said in Regarding administration on MSB:

It's also why I kind of focus on an alternative to Mildly Constructive, because that word seems to limit discussion

We have one. It's called the Hog Pit and you can call someone a deplorable piece of shit that you wish would have an unfortunate encounter with a Greyhound(the dog, not the bus) while you're knuckles-deep in their wife or husband, all you want there. Constructive discussions even happen there! Total anarchy! Dogs and cats, living together...yadda yadda. Mildly Constructive and Hog Pit can coexist. One needn't die so that the other may live. There can be constructive criticism, without it devolving into shitslinging. There can be shitslinging, without it being constructive.

There's nothing wrong with people saying they want a more pro-constructive/polite/work-safe alternative to the Hog Pit. There's nothing wrong with people saying that they want a section that is Thunderdome meets The Running Man. The Hog Pit is precisely where negative reviews can (and often do) go. Take off the opt-in feature. The responsibility for not clicking content with clear warnings can be on the user's end. "But I don't want to see bad things said about me/friends/people/etc!!", "So don't click it. You are presumably an adult with free will."

Those who don't want to venture in the Hog Pit can exercise self-control and not venture into the Hog Pit. Those who do, needn't worry over feeling like their voice is being censored or silenced through a hidden section.

Everyone wins! One big happy community full of rainbows and unicorns and years-old vendettas.

Starcraft II has apparently gone free-to-play now? The original campaign, multiplayer, and stuff and things have been unlocked.

Never really been into Starcraft, but I'm going to give this a whirl.

@thatguythere said in Regarding administration on MSB:

That is something that really only @Arkandel can decides since he is the one in charge.

@Arkandel

@ganymede that's pretty much my outlook of it. If I didn't eat as a kid? I slept at the table. Have the pictures to prove it. He wants a waffle though and I want eggs? Not a huge hurdle for me to make both. Dude wants what he wants, I can't fault that. He's not malnourished and eats fine throughout the rest of the day. Breakfast is just his one sticking point.

Faceless Jr. however is becoming quickly acquainted with the concept of timeout. The State says that I can't powerbomb him, so I typically resort to timeout in his room after talking it over with his speech therapist. I'll have to take a page from your book and try to timeout-reattempt-consequence method though.

Every morning my youngest has an Eggo blueberry waffle. He has for months. He doesn't want deviation from that. Try to give him eggs, sausage, and toast? Tantrum until he gets a blueberry waffle. Cereal? Nope. Blueberry waffle or death.

We had dinner at about 1800.

He just threw a tantrum in the kitchen, we couldn't figure out why. Thirsty? Nope. Want some Goldfish crackers? Nope. Have some broccoli, champ? Nope. He kept pointing at the toaster. Mrs. Faceless gave him a blueberry waffle to see if that's what he wanted. It's nearly 2000. I'm about to slap a dress on this dude and call him Eleven. I catch him with a nose bleed and I'm taking him out before it's too late.

ETA: First time he's wanted a waffle in the evening. Hence the general surprise on our end. I know it won't be continuing, because that's for breakfast and I'm not about to help him form a bad habit.

@aria said in Book Recommendations:

@faceless Yay!! Book buddies. Now which one of us is bringing the food and which one is bringing the booze?

I'll bring the bourbon. All I have is some chicken with cheese, rice, and brocolli.

@aria said in Book Recommendations:

I should be back to it in a few weeks, if you want to go through it together!

I'll be down for that. I'll be starting it once I get it. Which is projected as no later than the 21st, apparently.

@arkandel said in Book Recommendations:

@faceless For some reason I didn't enjoy that series as much as I did. I love most of his work though - The Heroes and Red Country, damn.

The Heroes is definitely on my list, though I'll be reading the series first. I've been told I have to read The Heroes because a character from the series has a larger(or main?) part in it and reminds them of one of my own, so I want to see what the hell they're talking about.

I got mail today! I excitedly opened the packaged. It was heavy. It was the dimensions and weight of a sizable hardback book, I knew what this was. Much excitement. I have a couple people eagerly awaiting my receiving The Blade Itself so that I can start the series. They're so enthusiastic about this that they've offered to read it again at the same time, so that we can discuss it as I go.

I open the package. I drop the spine of the book into the palm of my hand, with glee. Oh, no. Book two; which had the delivery date of roughly a week and a half later than book one.

Well, at least it looks nice on the shelf.

Tom Clancy's Clear and Present Danger is still a fun read, I guess.

Delicately and not like an OOC joke. That's how it should be handled.

You can roleplay, discuss, and do all manner of IC things without appearing like some OOC mongrel who has barely been house-trained. It's when people try to twist it into some OOC joke of 'teehee, we're so amusing and controversial!' that's when my inner staffer looks at that ban option. And then uses it.

ETA: And with some forewarning. You shouldn't blindside people with your controversial topics Out of Character; see previous Peeve/Gripe/RB about the person on Arx who tried to involve me in their rape fantasy roleplay.

@sg said in RL things I love:

Operation No Pants Till The 19th has officially begun. LET'S DO THIS!!!

AKA being asked to spend lieu days and getting a week off rules.

Welcome to my life. If you need advice, let me know.

ETA: Or if you're about to fall off the wagon, let me know. I can talk you down from wearing pants.

@seraphim73 said in How do you construct your characters?:

because that's the best way to leave holes to fill with other players

I've tried off and on for years and you've not let me smash. What's up?

@arkandel said in How do you construct your characters?:

Do you have a process about breaking down their personality? Do you consciously think about giving them flaws and what kinds interest you the most? Do you prefer to seek out other people and design ties with them or is that something you prefer to happen circumstantially or in-game?

Skipping the 'what do I want to play?', concept, or whatever as you've asked my method usually takes a day or two. Once I have the concept in mind, I think backward. It's also why I tend to mildly hate that your average CGen demands that you set the mechanical aspects of your sheet before the character's background/history/etc. In those systems where the mechanics come first, when I get to my background an change could be made that demands that I then have to backtrack and make a change(or, in some systems, start over entirely!).

So what I mean by thinking backward: I'll just use one of my current characters that I know you've had interaction with, Rybread on Arx. He grew up in a family that for the last couple hundred years has been on a decline. If it can go wrong, it will go wrong. His (birth) family is an exercise in Murphy's Law. Brother killed when he was kicked by his own horse, another younger brother that drowned for no discernible reason, bandits hit a supply train just before Winter and nearly resulted in a bunch of people freezing and/or starving to death, family members dying young(not limited to adults) for one reason or another. Just rotten luck, right? Well, how would that affect someone growing up? Sure, there are some who could laugh it off and move on their merry way, and some of those types are reflected within his currently rostered family. Another option is that you become generally very serious about life, prudent, low tolerance for nonsense, develop an eye for efficiency, a bit overbearing perhaps because of a need for a feeling of control, Constant Vigilance, and likely a dash of paranoia. So there we go, a personality has taken form. Well, he was trained as a knight, by a whitebearded old man who had trained all of them as knights; so he has a sense of duty ingrained in him, which he likely takes very seriously because he takes almost everything seriously. He's been trained with a martial mentality for much of his life so more than likely he respects and adheres to a chain of command, deferring to who is or whom he perceives to be his superiors, while taking command of those who are or are deemed beneath him or his dutiful purview.

So, I've got his personality and background worked up. That usually takes a day or two(I think for the character described above, I was in CGen for about a week, being nit-picky). By then I've got a very good idea of what the character is and who they are. Some CGs are a bit more limited than others, so the mechanical aspects are frequently a case of Set What You Can With What You Have. After that and once the character is in play, then it just becomes a matter of filling in the gaps or guiding the character along the path that I think makes sense. Sometimes, even well after CGen, I'll sit back and think hard about the history of a character. Speaking on a different character, I've got a privileged noble who has lived a largely easy life who has a point in Agriculture. Why did I buy that? Isn't that largely useless for him? Yup. But to me... this guy grew up with the best education, being doted upon, and had the world at his fingertips. If his parents were smart(which, by all accounts, they were) they'd have afforded him the absolute best education that they could have. Which means it would have provided him with a versatile education, which means that even if it was purely for the purpose of him being able to do more than nod along with glazed eyes during a conversation about crop yields with some peasant(he emphasizes with joking condescension), that should be represented. His parent(s) weren't idiots, they paid damn good money to ensure he was properly educated in the world, even in ways that he wouldn't necessarily need to be an expert in.

So in short I put a lot of time and effort into background, concept, and (I think especially) personality. To me all of that isn't done when CGen's done. It's a constant process of digging into the meat of your characters, no matter how different they are from one another. Understanding what makes them tick, what makes them choose the choices that they make, their ambitions, and even the mechanical choices that you make for them. They continue growing into the future, but their pasts shape them just as much.