@Seraphim73 Perception may well be the biggest problem that happened on The 100. Because while you're saying that yes this happened but you fixed it... you're neglecting to mention that it happened for months and only got fixed after people had left the game and this thread had started getting snippy about how you two were handling the game. Having individual people approach you and voice concerns did nothing. You and @GirlCalledBlu were so wrapped up in your characters and your fun (perceived), that actually staffing the game fell into last place on the 'to do' list. People that you were warned about being troublesome weren't 'watched' as you claimed. They were neglected until they became such a huge problem that you had to do something. This wasn't a case of 'it came up and was handled within a week or so'. It was a case of 'it came up and was willfully ignored for months before it became such a huge problem that it drove a lot of people from the game before it was addressed'. By the time it got to the Grounders being open for play, I already had a foot out the door because of unresolved worries and concerns that you and @GirlCalledBlu claimed to be 'watching' and mostly just seemed to handwave off in favor of playing your PC's. And yeah, maybe Grey got toned down later, but it was MUCH later as it was still being talked about after I'd left the game.
The problem I see here is that you and your wife, while lovely people, are more invested in your own fun than you are in actually running the game. Which, as mentioned previously, is fine with a sandbox where everyone involved has largely agreed to what you want to do anyways. But on a public game that's open to everyone and anyone, that means that you quickly become the 'absentee landlord' in your own game. The impression that I personally got anytime I spoke to you or @GirlCalledBlu was that of trying to speak to someone playing a video game. Which is to say that you were distracted, uninterested, and just wanted me to go away so said whatever you had to to make that happen so you could get back to your fun. On the few occasions where either of you would poll players about something, the questions were pretty clearly worded to direct people towards a desired answer. As in, you had the answer that you wanted, and the question was worded to point people directly at the answer you desired. And no, polling a handful of players regarding what standards and practices staff should adhere to? Not at all what people are asking for here. They're saying you need someone else that's on the same level as you and your wife (ie. another staffer) that can be the balancing force for you.
Going to a player as staff on your staffbit and asking if they personally would have a problem with you doing something as a player that could well affect the game at large? Generally not the best way to get a real answer. All that shows me is that you have no sense of separation between staff and player. And yes, that is CRITICAL if you're going to play on a game you staff. If you cannot separate what happens to your characters as a player, and your authority as staff? That is a HUGE problem. You cannot blur those lines. Ever. That @GirlCalledBlu acknowledges having difficulty separating the two while being one of the only two staffers (the other of whom is her husband) on a game is truly worrisome. That neither of you see that as a problem is seriously worrisome.
I really do wish you both the best and I hope your sandbox 5W game is successful for you both. But I personally will never play on a game where the two of you staff until I have concrete evidence that the problems I saw on The 100, and here, are no longer an issue. Maybe its just perception, but what I perceived was utter ignoring of basic staff etiquette.