Retail "Horror" Stories

Taika

Do you haaaaave to work retail to post the doozies? I work security in a 1.5 million square foot facility. I got some doozies.

Miss Demeanor

@Cobaltasaurus I could share the one where I was working the service desk and the drunk guy ran into the men's room (helpfully situated RIGHT NEXT to the service desk) and threw up all over the place. Maintenance at our store is largely all hispanic with little to no English and one white dude that would lose a race with molasses in February. We have no air conditioning in our store, either. You know, the one in FLORIDA. And we had to wait. An hour. For someone to show up to clean up the mess.

Or I could share the one where the obese woman complained that all the carts were being left in the handicap lane so nobody could walk in it... then promptly left the motorized chaircart in the handicap lane when she left the store.

Or there's the one where I was CSM'ing and had to deal with the asshole who insisted that we had to take back the car radio he bought despite being WELL past the return policy's due date by claiming he got the replacement plan. When told he would have to go through the 800 number, he cut me off to yell that he'd already tried that and they would only give him store credit because there was nothing wrong with the radio, he just found a cheaper one online and he wanted cash.

Or the one where the lady tried to return a USED breast pump, without receipt, three years after she'd purchased it (her own admission).

Or maybe the special woman who INSISTED that her case manager told her her WIC would cover food AND clothes... the clothes were for her, by the way, not her baby. She also had makeup that she was trying to buy with WIC because, and I quote, 'its a necessity'.

My favorite stories, however, revolve around the 75% off clearance sales the store manager's have been pimping off and on for the last six months.

Thenomain

Note to everyone:

If you have dick-pics on your computer, please close the window before you go in for face-to-face computer tech support.

Tinuviel

@Thenomain
Tinuviel takes notes

Arkandel

Tinuviel applies for a job in tech support

vanderlylle

Having worked for a couple years in a used bookstore, I am always impressed by how people pay attention to. We'd regularly find nude photos in books, that one of us then got the honor of sliding facedown across the counter to the owner (and/or subject of photographs) when they came to pick up their merch credit. We also found money (even hundred dollar bills), family mementos, break up letters, I'm having an affair letters, I'm in jail letters... The letters always made for really wonderful dramatic reading for us in buyback.

Nothing, though, compares to the stuff people actually thought they were still entitled to get money for. Dog ate it? Just resell it. Cat pissed on it? Infested with bugs and rat shit? Nah, the used bookstore will take it!

No. No we will not take it, and we will a) yell back at you when you get pissed we didn't, and then b) go douse ourselves in the hand sanitizer we picked up in bulk at Costco.

Goyim

Working in retail

I came here to laugh at the wage slaves since they brought this on themselves. Bet you fucks wish you worked harder in school and went to college.

I'm glad I did. I get paid a thirty digit salary to do nothing but sit around and bang hot sluts.

Miss Demeanor

@vanderlylle You'd be amazed the things that people think they can return to ANY store. As mentioned above, they'll try to return things that didn't even come from the store they're returning it to. Stuff that's obviously used. Stuff that's EMPTY. Stuff that they didn't even bring with them, if it exists at all.

Bobotron

@Miss-Demeanor
Oh lord, I know your feeling.
When I managed TRU, we had HORRIBLE people that tried to return stuff. We got to the point where we couldn't take back baby formula (people were buying it, switching the labels and then selling the 'old' stuff as new and trying to get their money back), or mostly anything from the baby department really.

Miss Demeanor

Without a receipt, we can't even accept forumla. Anything that could have been a WIC item (formula included), can only be direct exchanged for the exact item or a larger version of that item. So formula for formula only.

WTFE

OK, this has been bugging me for a while.

WTF is a "WIC"?

Zobi

Women Infants Children if I recall correctly.

Ganymede

@Zobi said in Retail "Horror" Stories:

Women Infants Children if I recall correctly.

Sounds like the best recipe for a stew for trolls.

Lithium

@WTFE It's food assistance for pregnant women and young mothers to help try and ensure that they get at least some decent food so they can live healthily.

Cobalt

@WTFE said in Retail "Horror" Stories:

OK, this has been bugging me for a while.

WTF is a "WIC"?

Yeah, it's a program that lists -specific- items that it'll pay for, for pregnant women or new mothers, or women with young children (such as those who adopted, or are fostering children). It'll pay for like ... 32 oz of "whole grains"-- which can be cereal or bread. And 16oz of fruit juice. A gallon of 1% milk. That sort of thing.

It's like specialized foodstamps but it also pays for things like formula. I'm not ... positive bout diapers? It might be. Not positive.

mietze

WIC does not cover diapers (or at least didn't when I was a foster parent). That's why there's always a huge huge ask for diaper donations to private foodbanks. Food stamps doesn't either, IIRC (or didn't then, but I never used food stamps only WIC vouchers, but I seem to recall other longer term fosters saying it didn't).

Miss Demeanor

Neither WIC nor foodstamps cover diapers. You have to qualify for cash assistance to have those covered.

Tinuviel

@Arkandel I'm a teacher. That's just tech support for flesh-machines.

Ganymede

@mietze said in Retail "Horror" Stories:

WIC does not cover diapers (or at least didn't when I was a foster parent). That's why there's always a huge huge ask for diaper donations to private foodbanks. Food stamps doesn't either, IIRC (or didn't then, but I never used food stamps only WIC vouchers, but I seem to recall other longer term fosters saying it didn't).

This, I learned from Eminem.

silentsophia

Please do not let your child chew on the trigger and nozzle of a pesticide can. Thanks.
Please do not shit on the floor and trail it throughout the store without telling anyone.
Please do not snap your fingers, point and whistle like I am a dog. 'Excuse me', or some other verbal equivalent is just fine. I am human. A retail worker, but a human nevertheless.
Please do not pee on things.
Please do not arrive in full Nazi regalia, rant about gun control and then get fussy when we ask you to leave. At least we were nice enough to let you get your latte and be sad first.
I swear to god, if another caffeine deprived asshole tears me a new one over a keurig machine, I'm going to find the nearest black and decker coffee maker and brain them with it.
Do not allow your child to play with the knives. Not even the ones in plastic covers.
Please do not let your toddler try to rock the 70" LED TV.