How to put an end to whisper game attacks?
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I was asked, at the time this all happened a year ago, by the fiancee of this person about the matter, as they were already aware of something going on, and were unsure if it was true or false. (I still don't know myself and was clear about this at the time.) That's who got the information and why; it did not go further by my hands.
I do not deny this for an instant.
Anyone who thinks of me as a monster is welcome to do so; it was no different than the screenshots shared with others in this conversation regarding things said about them, my own culpability wholly included.
I told you I did not go throwing this information around in whispers, and I don't. That I was making amends to others for my part in doing wrong to them was very well known at the time and no secret to anyone. That incident was not exempt.
Yes, other people knew about it at the time. Any time any of those people inquired with me prior to this, they were directed to you, full stop.
After you decided to go around making up craziness and spreading it to every discord circle in creation about me, when I was doing things like gathering up home goods for your new place and trying to be supportive of you without saying a bad word about you to anyone and telling others they shouldn't listen to the gossip about you and to give you a chance?
Yeah, you caused a lot of hurt with that garbage behavior. You don't care about any of that, though, and never have. You've never been sorry for any of the harm you did, and you continue to engage in the same behavior without a shred of remorse. (Spoiler alert: I don't. I learned my lesson.)
You want everyone to overlook it, but they should not. You hurt a lot of other people, too, and worse, you used me to hurt other people.
I still haven't forgiven myself for that, because I should have been smarter than that and realized that someone who constantly talks as much ugly trash about people as you do was doing it to me, too. But that isn't even really the problem. That would simply be fair play, all told! Listen to someone burn a bunch of people, you better damned well expect they're doing it to you, too.
There was one key difference: for a long time, I thought, 'well, at least it's real ugly things these people did' until I saw how completely unfettered from reality the things you were saying about me were and realized that the accusations and gossip about others was very likely to be similarly untrue. I am still horrified with myself for believing any of the things you said about others, because it made clear just how little you care about the truth, and how intent you are on causing genuine harm to others.
Hell, after the crap you said about the personal RL relationships between others on the forum for months, you sure have some nerve acting like this is the worst thing that could ever be done to a person when you violated multiple people for kicks in precisely the same way on record.
@thesuntsar Ghost was mentioned as someone currently blocked for taking part in the current round of garbage.
@tek Tell you what. There are screenshots floating around somewhere of the kinds of things Auspice was drumming up with others about me at length without my knowledge for months before any of the above occurred. If you don't believe people attempt character assassination in this hobby for trivial (or no) reasons, please be careful and vigilant. They absolutely do. You are a decent person and I would not want to see the same things happen to you.
Oh fucking well.
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@surreality This thread has been pretty uncomfortable to read. I'm sorry you're going through this but I really don't think this forum can help you figure it out. You've made a lot of vague posts about this in the past, I think, that it seems unlikely things are going to change. If it is affecting your real life, you need to go to real people, whether that means the relevant law enforcement, a therapist or counselor.
The only element you control here is yourself. Get away from the people causing you stress. If that means leaving a game you like because you can't avoid them, that's a small price to pay in the long run for your mental health. The same goes for mutual friends or chat groups. And frankly, I would strongly consider what you get out of this forum VS what affect this forum has on your wellbeing. Your interactions and relationships with the people causing you stress are unlikely to change and they are unlikely to remove themselves from here. Again, you can only control yourself.
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#FreeFarfalla
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surreality said in How to put an end to whisper game attacks?:
I was asked, at the time this all happened a year ago, by the fiancee of this person about the matter, as they were already aware of something going on, and were unsure if it was true or false. (I still don't know myself and was clear about this at the time.) That's who got the information and why; it did not go further by my hands.
I do not deny this for an instant.
Anyone who thinks of me as a monster is welcome to do so; it was no different than the screenshots shared with others in this conversation regarding things said about them, my own culpability wholly included.
I told you I did not go throwing this information around in whispers, and I don'tSo.
"I shared personal information then but it was justified and I'm sharing screenshots now, but I don't do this ever."
Can we stop this before it becomes a circus of spreading further information about people's private fucking business?
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@Meg I have specifically asked that not happen. If mods need to smack or edit something, that's a better course of action here.
Her current mode is already 'dogpile with attacks'. Let's try not to enable that.
Oh fucking well.
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@surreality I don't think this is constructive. I don't think it's fair to say that this thread doesn't belong in the hogpit. I mean, you did just accuse someone of sleeping with a man with a fiancee. I don't think there's any situation in which this thread gets constructive from there.
#FreeFarfalla
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@OldFrightful I haven't actually mentioned anything about this situation since the mess a year or so ago, at which point I considered it closed.
I have seen the 'tag team gossip and attack' behavior persist, however. Not on my end. I said I was done with it, and I'm done with it, have been since.
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@Meg said in How to put an end to whisper game attacks?:
@surreality I don't think this is constructive. I don't think it's fair to say that this thread doesn't belong in the hogpit. I mean, you did just accuse someone of sleeping with a man with a fiancee. I don't think there's any situation in which this thread gets constructive from there.
When she's talking about who I told about her sex life? That is who I told, when they inquired about the apology. The end. Yes, it does look a little different in it's real context than 'she ran around gossiping about my love life' as she has chosen to present it, but that is simply the reality of the situation.
ETA: This is something I never would have chosen to bring up publicly on the board. There's a reason I contacted her privately as she describes: to prevent exactly this, after she began bringing this up in public elsewhere.
Oh fucking well.
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@surreality I don't disagree that it provides a different context. That isn't the point of my post.
#FreeFarfalla
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@Meg I have done things RL just as crappy, knowingly or not.
I'll totally talk about her private business right now: I firmly believe she had no idea at the time and people should not consider this intentional wrongdoing on her part.
I felt bad for her, and I still feel bad for all parties involved.
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@RDC Probably for the best. We have also had our dustups in the past, but I'm happy to see the you you've been lately around here. You sound much healthier and happier, and that is good stuff.
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I am going to temporarily lock this topic until there's time to discuss with other admins. I agree that this does not fit with "constructive" part of the forum and it's also starting to involve RL information disclosed /about third parties/ as well. No names have been mentioned so I do not think it breaks any letter of the rules here, but I would really urge consideration of editing out that information (and it may happen anyway) by the original posters.
