RL peeves! >< @$!#
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Touchscreen laptops are useless unless that laptop is also a tablet.
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Obnoxiously loud mariachi music at three in the morning on a week day. If I'm not invited to your Mexican ho-down, don't include my house. In your goddamned audio festivities.
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If you're going to break the gym rules to bring your toddler up to the 2nd story track (8+ with supervision I believe) then for fuck's sake don't ignore them when they throw themselves down on the ground in the middle of the very narrow running space while you continue to walk around it like nothing's going on.
I get the need to not escalate tantrums. Really I do. I have done the walk of shame with 3 children under the age of 2 all screaming through the grocery store. I have been in a place with not being able to afford a night out or a babysitter when really I probably could have used one. But if you cannot put your child in the very nice, very appropriately staffed child care that you're already paying for if you're working out here (I had a clinger, so I know how difficult that can be do) then for fuck's sake, walk around the gym at the gym level where they are permitted to be and don't pose a hazard to anyone or themselves and they can run and play and maybe even chase a basketball or two!
Bonus points if you shoot me a dirty look when after I run a mile while you ignore this and do nothing to help your child work through their tantrum in this very inappropriate place where I've seen another less patient runner get to the point of almost clipping them a few times, I stop to talk to your child and get them to move off to the corner by offering to make a "fort" of the stretching mat leaned up against the wall. No really, fuck you. If you want your child to only be looked at/spoken to by you, then maybe you should...you know. Supervise them.
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@mietze
Seriously, mad props for that. Working...let's say too many service industry jobs over the years, I've seen shit parenting like that that would turn your hair white, like literally left my mouth agape, and as a dad myself I just do not fucking understand. There's got to be a fine or something. -
A friend of mine is a very good father, yet his tween-aged child still took an entire bottle of medication.
I think the fine we pay is "life is what it is; sometimes you act all entitled and luck out, sometimes you try really hard and still get the bad luck thrust upon you".
That any of us survive until we're old enough to risk our own damn lives is what astounds me.
“If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe.”
― Carl Sagan, Cosmos -
I've been attacked by dogs twice as a kid, had stitches in my forehead, had a couple of dressers fall on me, stuck in a mattress that clam'd in half on me, blew up a shed, dyed myself blue and found the magic that was mom's crossbow.
Frankly, yeah, I'm kinda shocked a lot of us have lived long enough to fuss about it.
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@Thenomain said:
A friend of mine is a very good father, yet his tween-aged child still took an entire bottle of medication.
Well, I mean, was he just standing there picking his nose while his kid downed the bottle? Probably not, right? There is a difference between "crazy things kids do" and "gross negligence," especially when we're talking older kids with more independent time. I wasn't trying to imply that nothing bad ever ever happens to good parents, I mean I've seen people just literally be shit people, in public, and their kids pay for it. So I was appreciating the efforts of strangers.
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I hate criticizing other parents. Mostly because I have a healthy fear of the law of karmic retribution, since every "Well MY Kids Will Never Do THAT" type of shitty thing I said out loud (and a few I thought) about other parents in more advanced stages of parenting than me, I have had come up and bite me so hard in the ass I'm suprised I have cheeks to sit on. I'm sure I have my comeuppance yet again now that my first three kids are all teen/tweens, since I was the very best parent ever to teenagers when I only had sweet little kids.
Sometimes kids are little shits. Any parent who claims that their child has never been one is (IMO) lying or delusional. This kid tonight was not being a brat, he was just being a 2 year old who was in an inappropriate environment. That's really what turns it into a peeve for me. Toddlers drop to the ground. All of mine have done that in embarrassing situations (parking lots, the aisle of the airplane, Target, naked in the middle of the locker room floor while soaking wet after swim class, ect). Hell, my twins were bolters so I even tried those leashes (but then they promptly ran crosswise from each other and clotheslined each other full speed the first time I tried those fuckers out).
I understand the difficulties and lack of control over children's behavior. It still doesn't mean I don't get annoyed when a parent chooses to bring their child to an area where it is clearly marked that they're not supposed to be, and then willfully chooses to ignore then while they are doing things that are dangerous/part of the reason why children that age are not allowed to be in that area.
That really has nothing to do with luck.
I have kids that are not picky eaters and thus will eat almost anything I set in front of them without complaint. That's luck. It has nothing to do at all with fantastic parenting on my part, because I did nothing at all parenting wise to receive that. I have a good friend whose child has had suicidal ideations and attempts since he was 8 (he's now in his mid-teens). Also luck, because she is a much better parent than I will ever hope to be, and this terrible thing is happening to her and her child that is neither of their faults.
Bringing your child to an inappropriate and marked place and then ignoring them to the detriment of the many other people using that space appropriately is not luck though, that's a choice. Deciding to do that and then to get pissy when someone speaks to the kiddo to help (I didn't know who the parent was until I did that) is also a choice.
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Stuck on the subway next to someone who was reading their book out loud to themselves the whole time. Maybe there's a disability involved, I don't know! But at 7:30 am on the commute, arghh.
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@mietze said:
Bringing your child to an inappropriate and marked place and then ignoring them to the detriment of the many other people using that space appropriately is not luck though, that's a choice.
Don't forget about the gym staff that should have guided the parent and child to the well-staffed day care.
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I'm sure they would have if this was still going on when the hourly cleaning/towel person made their rounds. Unfortunately, at the time of the incident there was not a staff person there. This is probably why there's well posted signs everywhere explaining the rules on age limits/what direction to run when/track etiquette on the stairwell entrance, both door into the track itself. But you know, I'm open the the idea I'm a bitch with impossible expectations in this situation.
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I find little children in public absolutely annoying, for the most part, because a lot of parents today suck at parenting. (#NotAllParents, etc)
I know if I did half the shit I see some of these kids doing, I'd be in a world of trouble the moment I got home, usually in an "old-school" method. For the most severe incidents, "the belt". I learned pretty quickly that acting like a little shit in public was not in my (ass's) best interest.
I'm not saying everyone should beat their kids when they misbehave, but the new-age "coddle" approach really doesn't work, especially when it just seems to devolve into "ignore the kid, maybe he'll tire out in a few hours". Either leave them at home with a babysitter, or step up and actually do some parenting.
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@Spitfire
Today's objectionable parenting seems to arise from the typical short-cut thinking that pervades all levels, from political stances to "educated" discussions on the Common Core standards.
In my opinion, when the child is acting up -- and that means he/she/it is acting like a shithead for no discernible reason -- that's when you "ignore" them. "Ignore" does not mean "let the shithead do whatever the fuck he/she/it wants"; it means "do not give the attention that the shithead desires." When that behavior escalates, more direct punishment should be employed; when it degrades, the behavior will atrophy over time.
Much like puppies, children can be trained and conditioned. In fact, that's what we are doing through parenting; we just prefer to call it "parenting". Frankly, the only difference between my little ones and the cat is that the cat's a lot smarter than they are: he knows to shit in one area.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
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@Ganymede said:
Much like puppies, children can be trained and conditioned. In fact, that's what we are doing through parenting; we just prefer to call it "parenting". Frankly, the only difference between my little ones and the cat is that the cat's a lot smarter than they are: he knows to shit in one area.
Main reason I don't want kids. I'm spoiled with my shepherd; no kid will be able to learn to poop in the right place at 9 weeks old.
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Fuck the first day back at work after an amazing vacation.
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@Spitfire
Also keep in mind that 'the belt' and other such punishments, these days, could have someone calling the police / child protective services. Will someone for sure? No. If they do, is the parent in question generally nailed? Oh yes. Corporal punishment is not legal, even for your own children.
Mind, I still spank. Or did, when my child was age appropriate. I also know someone that put her teenage son down on the floor when he stepped up the first (and last) time like he was going to kick her ass. I think some kids -- particularly some boys -- need it, particularly when the hormones are going crazy but you can still get the foundations into their head that YOU DO NOT WANT TO DO THIS BECAUSE CONSEQUENCES. Stepping up to kick your mother's ass is probably never a good idea, even once you're taller than she is.
These days we parent in privileges (and revoking them), but if I had a little one I would swat. That doesn't make it legal, and it doesn't mean I wouldn't get in serious legal trouble (as well as losing custody) were somebody to decide to go after me. It's the reality of parenting in this day and age.
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Yes, but even reading that article still supports my point. I was misinformed about it being illegal though, clearly. Wrong was I!
Even so, though the headline itself says it's legal, the article actually goes more into depth on the topic and contradicts itself. But! Not illegal. This is good.
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Any one at any time can start a cps investigation for any reason. And it's anonymous.
Fun? What is this fun thou speakest of?
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I guess what I was looking for wasn't 'not legal' but 'is in violation of agency policy', which is different but still has a similar end result.
