@auspice said in RL Anger:
@ganymede said in RL Anger:
@auspice said in RL Anger:
This man is an ass.
This wasn't just harsh criticism.
He never said a single positive thing. He cut me off constantly. He was practically yelling at me at times.
It took Phil Lord and Chris Miller almost 15 years to get a project of their own up off the ground again, and for crowds to appreciate their humor.
That said, when you're ready you should ask your instructor to put all of his criticism down into writing. And then, you should forward that onto his supervisor, along with the accounts of everyone else in your class who probably went through the exact same thing.
Abuse comes in many forms, and always breeds in darkness.
I hate that I began crying, but being cut off and snapped at every time I tried to explain myself... Especially when he'd ask me to explain and then 'NO. Stop talking and listen!' ...it just got to me and I found myself (silently) crying for a bit. I was just so frustrated.
At one point, I did manage to explain: 'I did this this way because in part 1 of the class, we were told...'
'You just misunderstood him.'
I got a good grade in that other class. I don't think would have if I had misunderstood things.
I am definitely going to be talking to my advisor about it. I accepted the phone conference because I know it's important to transition from just written criticism (which allows you time to process/react) to live (where you have to stay composed and react on the spot)... But he wasn't professional. Asking me a question and then cutting me off isn't. Ranting on at length when I've already said I understand isn't. Not being able to say even one positive thing about my work isn't.
I mean, shit, we students can lose professionalism points in our grade if we don't say at least one positive thing to our classmates in feedback/review.
Over the course of my time (as an adult student) at my alma mater, I complained about two professors. One was rampantly and disgustingly sexist and racist, while teaching a class that was effectively about colonialism, so that was.... fun. In his case, I ended up reporting him to the Chancellor and their legal counsel, effectively saying to the school "Between his comments to 19 year old girls and his comments to brown boys, your ass is gonna get sued. FIX THIS."
The other.... was a case much more like your own. I had a professor who -- in a half-semester class that met twice a week for three hours -- ended multiple classes early and cancelled three classes with no warning but a note taped on the door. (Bear in mind: We were almost all adult students. None of us lived on campus. Thanks for making some of us drive from an hour away for no reason!) So she'd cancelled almost half our class time. The rest of our class time, she'd frequently launch into lectures... about her personal life, totally unrelated to the material. She was rude. She was belittling. She constantly cut students off in class. She'd ask for opinions and literally just dismiss them midway through a sentence with 'No.' Halfway through the course and she hadn't given any of us, not one, a single item we'd turned in with feedback, so we had no idea what our grades were, what her expectations were, or how to calibrate to meet them. She didn't follow her own syllabus and about half the time, none of us knew what was due despite repeatedly asking her. Most of the students hated her.
In her case, I didn't go to the Chancellor because it wasn't quite to the degree of "You are leaving yourself open to some serious liabilities if he gropes a girl and then years of this professor's reputation suddenly come spilling out and the administration is all 'Whoopsies!!! Didn't knoo---oooow.' sing-song bullshit." (Legit, I was once in the bathroom during a break bitching to a classmate about this guy and a girl in the next stall, who was not in our class, came charging out when she heard his name and went off. It was glorious and we both felt way less crazy.)
In her case, I went to the head of HER department with a long and documented list of her behaviors, including classes cancelled, dates of items turned in we hadn't yet heard anything back on, verbatim comments meant to students... and got two of my fellow students to sign off on it.
She had an email from him within 48 hours demanding to know what the hell was going on in her class. She was pissed and continued being snotty, but.... she had to temper some of it, we all got our assignments back and we all passed. Not quite what I wanted re: her behavior, but after a month of dealing with her bullshit, I was willing to accept an option of 'stick this out for a few more weeks, pass, and never interact with this woman again.' (And no, the department head didn't tell her who complained. Retaliation against complaining students will usually get a professor in a lot of trouble, which is why it's important to lodge said complaint before a class ends.)
I'd recommend going to your adviser first. If that doesn't work, kick it over to his department head. And then it goes on up the chain from there, usually to a Dean, the Chancellor, the university President. That reporting chain exists for a reason and things can be escalated if necessary, but except in rare cases, it's generally best to start at the lowest level. Documentation is always helpful, especially if there may be any question at all of you simply complaining about your grade instead of an inappropriate behavior. If you have any contact with your classmates who have similar stories, this will be the biggest help to you. Corroborating your accounts and offering up similar experiences is usually the fastest way to get through to a university administration; when students or staff -- and I have been both -- start banding together and comparing notes, they get nervous.