Posts made by Goldfish

I wanted to start a thread like this but I didn't have an angle. This is a good angle.

I'll be back. Soon...and probably often.

@Sunny Living the dream.

It's Christmas and I'm feeling the warm and fuzzies so...

I've been RPing since about 2005-07 and MUing since about 2010. Today, I finally feel like I have found a community. I play on a few games and I feel like I have made friends on those games. Friendships and RP partners that stretch to other games. It's a good feeling to end what was personally an awful, awful year on a positive note.

Even though I am feeling the crispy edges of burnout and my creativity is on the downswing, I keep coming back because of the people.

@saosmash That's exactly the word I stole from here to use to talk to normals.

I would say no to it being video game because of the collaborative nature of the story and plot. I keep thinking of a story heavy, lo-ish fi video game like Fallout 1. And I think, how would the experience change if another person was on the other end of that NPC. A person with a countless ideas on how the conversation should go and you have no direct control over it.

Because, no matter the system, when you are in a scene, the other play can type back anything. You think you are chatting about pets over coffee when suddenly BOOM. They have blown your head off. To further my point, you don't get to step aside after making a bad choice in a video game and save to the NPC, "Hey, you know what...I shouldn't have said that. Let me try again?"

So. No. It's improv, to use a more common term.

EDIT: @Apos There is a video game out now, A Blind Legend that is aimed at the visually impaired. They are taking advance of high quality 3D audio. So, while it's just one game, there is innovation happening.

@Daeladras

Him. This guy. I come from RPing in WoW. I met him and he, who could sell me ice if I were an eskimo, talked me into trying a nWoD MU. This was in 2010/'11. So. Thanks, bro.

I'll add a little something that was of mild concern to me before I jumped in at story one: Isle of Dread. World building. I asked myself if I cared if the worlds were underdeveloped in this proposed cycle of stories. I decided I cared more about the character ideas and moved on along.

And then Prosperity's Price happened. The island was fun, short and experimental. I had personal RL issues during Aliens and Sci-Fi isn't my genre. The combo made for bad decisions and a bad time but it's on me. Not on the game. I was glad to move to a new setting. Historical at that!

Oh lord, Prosperity exists. It's as well formed and built in my mind as a game I've been playing for years. My character (The Confidant as archetype), is as real and bound to me as much as any character I have ever played. He and I are so twisted that horror and tragedy within the story have affected me in RL which, of course, speaks to my own insanity but it speaks to the world that has been built by The Director and the other PCs.

My boy has friends, family, loves, dreams and all of those things are crumbling before his eyes in slow motion and by the time any scene is over I need a day or two to disengage. Tears have been shed. It's been a very intense experience and I am happy to say I haven't had any OOC drama to make things worse or more intense as drama bleeds in. No no no. This is my fault. I aimed for a different exploration of the Archetype and just made myself sad.

It's awesome. We, as the characters, feel a little bit like soldiers in the trenches. Just holding it together until it's over for better or worse. Praying for the best and expecting the worse. Let's not go into characters with TB that are doomed no matter what.

It's been stunning but I am so, so, so ready for Slasher that holds the promise of being lighter and funnier. That said, I don't expect the world to be any less vivid or the characters to pack less punch. It'll just be different.

Thanks for coming to my TedRP talk.

When you are in a scene or making plans with someone and you realize that nerdy pretendy fun times really is cooperative storytelling and it's awesome and it's the most fun one can have for free as far as I'm concerned.

So the current story has had highs and lows that HBO and Netflix can only dream of. This is some of the best co-op storytelling I have ever been involved in. More connections and stories have sprung up out of natural RP, for me, than any OOC conversation and planning and it's FIRE y'all. I'm having a blast while crying while laughing. Most fun for free. Get on this.

When your PC gets their Crowning Moment. If you could bottle that feeling, you could be a billionaire.

So you got the writer's block. Nothing is moving the creative pipes. You keep running into walls as you attempt to plot or create or what have you.

But then...that moment when you land on the ONE THING that will solve all your problems and all the pieces fall into place. Yeah. That's good shit.

Forgiveness is my jam. The "Goldfish Grudge" is where my screen name comes from. I've said it before but I'll reframe it.

Everyone can have a bad day, week, month. In my case, my entire summer was just trash and the months preceding were not great either. (Fuck 2018) I don't think I did anything unforgivable. I know I got under people's skin, annoyed, whined, whatever. I was in a bad place and I didn't even know it at the time. If anyone is reading this and I did something unbecoming, I do apologize and I believe I am improving.

Some years ago, I had a personal meltdown that spilled into the hobby. That's my black mark and I'm gonna end it there.

I've been Mushing since roughly 2010 or so. So eight years. I do not want my entire time with this community to be defined by my rough patches and the bad habits and behavior that I become too weak to fight. So, in turn, I forgive easily. I afford others the same I would want for myself. I strive to treat others as I want to be treated in all things.

Add in the fact that I am forgetful and I will completely blank on why I'm 'supposed' to hate Person A this week.** Put in a dash of, 'this hobby is too fucking small to hate everyone in it if I want to keep playing and creating.' and you have the Goldfish Guidelines of Forgiveness. Only three players, that I have dealt with personally, are exempt from this. I won't play with them, period, as long as I recognize them. (I don't always know who is who and I prefer it that way. Keeps me unbiased)

**That forgetfulness has saved me countless times from toxic hate circlejerks.

Edits have happened.

I even added a Coming Soon section because I totes believe that speaking it makes it more likely to happen. Or something.

I had a thought about the Activity portion as I was reminded about the purpose of the three prong method. Character development.

I can see playing a character who begins as 'inactive'. The sort that chills in the bars or chitchats on the street with randos. All until a monster rampages the coffee shop or swarms of rats flood his street. It's a classic call to action and now ChillBro has to act!

Same can be said for an Unlikable or Incompetent. Get nice. Learn. Shake and bake character development.

Here is as good a place as any to put out a call.

I got my idea for my PC. I mentioned here (Or somewhere else) that I was going to reimagine my Psychic -> Vampire as an M+. Well, the "reimagining" has taken a turn and I kinda don't even know this guy anymore. (Besides his PB. That stays.) My point is, I have a lot of ideas and no one to collaborate with or keep my overexcited ass in check. So, I'm gonna drop my idea here and if anyone is interested in connections or the like once this lovely game comes to fruition, I am totally game.

Inspired by Daredevil, the basic gist is Psychokinetic Vigilante. He finds out about X crime or Y crime and he hits the streets armed with some decent enough fighting skills and the ability to fling icicles and large objects WITH HIS MIND. In his current draft, he has an adult daughter who patches him up from his big dumb escapades but kicks him out afterward. He's technically homeless, living in a van and doing odd jobs and day labor to feed himself but righting the wrongs of the city is his real job, if you ask him.

That's what I got. That and a google doc of random floaty ideas. So, ya know, any interest in that kinda thing...HMU, yo. A partner would be kinda cool.. An actual PC to do the patching. A connect in the police force. A fellow homeless sidekick. A lawyer to keep his stupid ass out of jail. Ideas! Ideas everywhere!

@sunnyj said in I owe a lot of people some apologies.:

@goldfish I see your reasoning. The problem with what you do is that bad people will sometimes predate on good people like you, and actually hide behind you when stuff gets hot. I know finding people to RP with isn't always easy, but you will end up being abused, and that will hurt the community in the long run.

Oh, I know this one! Because it has totally happened. More than once! I don't condone my reasoning, I like to put it out there as an alternative perspective.

I've watched my reputation get dragged down with someone else's because GOD FORBID I lose another partner. Which reminds me, there are TWO people I will never play with again. I really want to name and shame this person because they were straight up abusive to me but I don't think they play anymore so it's a shout into the void.

@ziggurat said in Unlikeable, incompetent, and inactive: Can these characters work in an MU?:

@goldfish In my experience, unlikeable characters lead to people disliking the player behind them.

This is my fear when creating. I have a hard time out there making friends and contacts as is, I don't need to be accused of being anything I'm not.

That said, I have been sneaking unlikeable traits into my characters. Insecurities, raging tempers, inflated egos, sexism, etc. I only have one who has likable, what I call, bones. He's meant to be likable by many and that's in his core. The rest...well, I reveal these traits as the character gets closer to another or in times of stress. It is my hope that by that point, the other players know I'm not an asshole and I can get away with my character being an ass. Fingers crossed.

I'm gonna just toss out this other, possible reason for the retention of toxic players in the community. Only because it's how I think and it's part of the reason I try not to hold grudges.

We are a small community, split already by various fandoms and RPG systems. I can usually count my regular RP partners on one hand at any given time since I joined up. And no. They are rarely the same folks, as far as I know. I always think to myself: "Is it in my best interest to hang on to my anger at this player from X game or do I just want to play?"

Now, I have been fortunate to have never been in tight with any high profile toxic players. I am always on the fringe of any given clique. I have had a few close calls with known creepers but again, I got lucky. Outside of known problematics, there is only one player I will not associate with. This person is boring, unoriginal, clingy and vindictive. I don't think they post here but I won't name and shame. If I happen upon this player, I cross the figurative street to keep away from them. At the same time, I don't go out of my way to find out if we are in the same circles. Mainly because I'll know the second they pose but still...

I'm rambling. TL;DR: I stick with players because I want someone to play with. I'm sad like that.

I got roped into a trial of Skillshare by a Youtuber and I watched a course on writing characters. (Because making characters is life) Without blowing the guy's whole course, he presented a simple three-point method in creating characters.

Likeability: How likable are they? Asshole? Saint? Just plain affable?
Competency: How good are they at what they do. Sherlock Holmes? Bumbling oaf?
Activity: How active are they within the story? Hip deep in the action? Lazing about the bar?

He goes on about how a character can arc and grow out of their weaknesses but something else came to mind in relation to this particular hobby. We engage in cooperative storytelling. It's not writing in a bubble. So, in my mind, this whole method has issues. If I create an unlikeable, will anyone want to play with me? If I go low on activity, can I even play within plots? On the flipside, an incompetent character can be really fun and even a competent character on paper might roll terribly and come off as a failure unintentionally. (My psychic was stacked as fuck but rarely rolled well. I wound up leaning into it and having him think he was way more amazing than anyone ever saw.)

So I'm sitting here, wondering to myself: Can I make an unlikeable character? Can I make a low activity one? Is this viable in roleplay and if so, how do I make this magic happen?

@surreality, you know I'm a big fan and cheerleader of yours but yeah, I had wondered if something odd was going on for a while. I didn't suspect that you had a nasty little birdy in your ear. As someone who often trucks with nasty little ear birds*, I get it. You are doing the right thing by owning up and apologizing. It's not easy. Being so, so wrong on a large scale is enough to make anyone sick.

I get nauseous after most negative interactions (No matter how minor) with people on the internet but I'm a nervous wuss.

Anyway, you still got my pom-poms.

***About that asterisk up there...***

Why are you guys going to make me choose the Devil? What kind of choice is that?!

On Topic: I love when others take the ball you give them and run. My PC gave another some heroin. (Don't worry. It's Bayer's. Totes safe.) Total IC thing he'd do, did it and moved on. I breeze about the wiki to find that that PC kept on RPing that he was stoned off his ass. I don't normally read logs unless instructed, so I don't usually pay them a lot of attention but it was a nice thing to see. Co-op storytelling is nice.

Vaguely related to my declaration of love for research is the moment when it all comes together and the character comes alive. They are no longer just stats or development notes. They live. I say that the character talks to me because that's kinda how it sounds in my head. Suddenly it's them telling me the facts I just researched in their own words. It's a trip and I love it.