Best posts made by Sunny

I am not dead. As noted, health issues have contributed to life issues, and I am a mixture of unfit for human company and pity party atm. Best for everyone (but especially me) if I do not engage with stuff. I am having a rough time (and let me tell you, saying that in public is hard) but this too shall pass.

I am having heart problems, but they are not of a sort that are likely to be fatal as long as I do what I should when I should. Stress contributes, and the mental health issues surrounding being this sick turns weird things into stress. Thank you for thinking of me. Sorry if this was TMI, I am unable to figure the right line out right now.

Everyone say something nice. She is being harassed because she told somebody 'no' on a feature request, and it can get tiring. Given how much she has done for us and our community, I think we should counter the harassment with saying nice things.

Go.

I'll start: Ares has made it a million times easier to start a game. We are seeing a lot of new, intriguing content now from some of these smaller games. It is so cool, and it wouldn't be possible without all her hard work.

I am officially down 5 pants sizes from when I started working this job a year and a half ago (and by officially, I mean I am not having to wiggle to zip the pants up). Between activity levels, far less stress, and healthier eating (both in terms of what I eat, and also how I eat it)...I've just steadily been getting better. Is pretty cool.

Putting up with somebody's abuse is not a reasonable accomodation.

So, I'm sure no one is surprised to hear that I am one of those people who likes to sit with my feelings, make friends with them. A significant appeal for me with mushing is the emotional connection/content, just like it is with video games, just like it is with television. If I'm not crying at some point, I'm not invested enough to really enjoy myself, and I have a problem with being able to play if I'm not wired to my PC's brain on some level. While I'm 'plugged in', part of my enjoyment is experiencing my character's emotional content. I wrote a private journal-y thing a few days ago and made myself BAWL with it. Nobody will ever see that, I just like crying I guess.

It becomes a problem for me when:

a- the emotions continue after time away (turning the game off doesn't make the feelings stop)
or
b- I start making my feelings other peoples' problem (people on the game, people who share meatspace with me)

Sometimes problems are OK; something falling through after a RL year of work, I'm GOING to be pretty inconsolable, whether it's a tabletop character or a mush plan. If I strip mush-context out, can I explain it to a non-gamer and they'll understand? This is OK. These emotions get dealt with just like the same emotions that are caused by other major disappointments or loss or whatever. Friends, self-care, distraction, whatever.

Sometimes it's just unhealthy, particularly when you're talking about anger or SPECIFICALLY, feeling personally wronged by the choices of other CHARACTERS (not players, even though yes, players are behind them) -- this stuff is awful, and it's bleed that needs to be addressed immediately. If self-coaching / reminders of what I'm dealing with doesn't make the feelings stop (talk myself down out of the tree, these people did not just kill my darling), then I need to unplug and walk away until I'm feeling like a reasonable human being again. This actually includes the feelings that happen in reaction to genuinely being wronged, to be clear -- in the moment, it can't be addressed in a healthy fashion, so you really just do need to unplug until your behavior is at least under control.

ETA: I mean, I am still fucking broken about (spoiler) in FFXIV. I played through that eleventy billion years ago, and my ass takes my PC to the in game grave with some regularity. I LIKE CRYING.

My new job is amazing. I've stepped into an entirely different culture, and in every way it's the best work environment I've ever been in. This job is pretty much unreal; I have a hard time believing it. I'm being paid what I'm worth for the first time, my benefits are fully paid for (and they're ridiculously good, too! 200 deductible? 2k out of pocket max? what?!), and the sick/leave time is super generous. There is daily a spread of food that people bring in from home, everything put in the particular area is open season. Just because. I have eaten so much fry bread the last week, even if it IS bad for me. There is going to be little to no stress -- this last week my new boss has apologized to me multiple times for how stressful/hectic it has been, it's not usually like this -- and it's fucking NOTHING. Like, I didn't even feel any pressure, let alone actual stress.

And to top it all off, I'm doing something I love. Not only do I get to devote a large portion of my time to training, I get to choose what I teach, make my own material and lesson plans, and so on. When I'm not doing that, I'm getting to play with setting up computers and troubleshooting and stuff. Like. What. This doesn't qualify as work. It's nuts.

So. 3 day weekend, starting today. Yesterday, get an email at about noon from the big boss. Go home, have a good weekend.

Paid.

I keep waiting to wake up. o.o

So, I had another heart attack after nothing for 2 years, having been pronounced 'cured' by virtue of the final cardiologist saying there was nothing apparently wrong with me and the attacks had stopped (I had 3 back in 2015).

It is so hard some days to keep swimming upstream. So, so, so hard. The medical professionals are doing their best, but nobody really knows what the hell they're doing when you present with something that doesn't fit the mold.

THIS IS NOT GOING TO KILL ME, for the record. The nature of it being what it is, I am gonna manage to survive it as long as I don't give up. Which I won't, because I've stubborned through everything else like this in my life. It just sucks. Like really, hardcore, incredibly sucks.

I don't want to be broken any more.

It's almost like people have differing experiences and place different weight and import on matters related to sexuality. Weird.

Doubleposting because today is a day for winning.

My short-term disability claim was approved!!!!! FINALLY.

My ex husband actually tried to pull this stalker sort of shit. Threatening me with various things and all of it would just go away if I would sit down and TALK to him. Why wouldn't I just be mature and have a ten minute conversation? He wouldn't try and break into my house in the middle of the night if I didn't MAKE him, after all.

We're heading into hell week. Brace for impact, be particularly kind to the people in meat space. I hope everybody has a good holiday season and stuff.

Coming out the other side of burnout is a glorious thing. The light at the end of the tunnel was NOT a train!

As of tomorrow, I will be 1 month without smoking or any sort of nicotine replacement. So no vape, gum, patch, anything. Just nothing. I am already noticing a significant difference in how I feel.

I don't understand why this is actually a problem. There is a plot reason for it, people are working for it, and it is a tangible goal people can succeed at. There is no limit to the pieces of pie here, everyone can have part of the fun. I do not see why this is something that needs more of a solution than already exists.

Should we set a limit on how many people can have 5s? It's just as much of, if not more than, a realism issue.

ETA: Especially given that there are NPC houses, why is it a problem if people plan smart, grow and invest well, and get bigger? None of this shit is just being handed out without work, which is how most of the non-elevated people got THEIR power.

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/researchers-create-first-honey-bee-vaccine-180970985/

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@chibichibi said in Idling all day on MU*s:

@lotherio I think it's a problem when there's more idling than RPing. The main question is how to get people to RP instead of just idling.

1 - invite them to play directly

2 - start scheduling public things happening that the people in question could join

3 - help build connections between characters / players so they know more people

4 - encourage a culture of regularly and publicly inviting people to play, including a premise and a hook -- 'hey I'm going to go RP seeing something weird in the ocean at the beach if anyone wants to join me' <-- the more people doing this, the more people will come out and be engaged

5 - mind your own business

I am in normal sized jeans now guys. I am currently wearing jeans you get not in plus size areas. O.O

The only thing I have to add that hasn't been covered here already is:

If I am on an actual game (and not goofing around on Shang), I want to be left out of it. I should be able to talk in terms of my PC and my character without ever bringing up what MY particular preferences/limits/etc. are. My kinks have no place (for me) in RP where I am playing a character and so on. When I say that I want to not talk about me or the person behind the other character (save to avoid things that might upset/trigger/whatnot the other person), that should be respected. Deal with it IC, play your PC, even in the bedroom. If your character whips out the chains, understand that REGARDLESS of what I might like, my character may very well flip the hell out. Just keep it IC. IC. IC. IC. IC.

TSing does not give my partner any ownership over my time as a player. Ever. I will bolt like a thing that bolts the first time somebody implies that they get to tell me what I can / can't do. My character virtually screwing your character does NOT imply anything about you and I as players. Period.

I have other rules and such (and many of them are mentioned here), but I'm really a sucker for throwing them out if the story is good and then regretting the hell out of it later. It's something I need to work on. No RP is worth pretending I didn't notice the 'oh, you ARE still allowed to RP with other people' comments.