Posts made by surreality

@Misadventure This actually is a thing. Not a 'hot button' or personal peeve.

@Misadventure said in The 100: The Mush:

As I said, I'm not addressing the specific person's actions, which provide context and some chance of sussing out actual motivations or attitudes.

TL;DR

"I'm sorry X was taken that way" does not equal insincere all by itself.

How one phrases things counts. It's relevant. There are ways of conveying, "I'm sorry, I did not intend to offend you." "I'm sorry you took offense," is not one of them.

@Wizz I couldn't get any further than the 50 Shades of Brony contract agreement. I had to stop.

@Misadventure --

@Zyrus said in The 100: The Mush:

I do apologize that was what it was taken as, just saying that wasn't my intention.

It's the 'I'm apologizing for someone else making an error' that makes it insincere.

If it was, "I'm sorry I said something that caused discomfort, I did not intend to," it would be different -- but there's a very clear blame-shift in the statement above. That's what's problematic: he's not apologizing for what he did, he's apologizing for someone else interpreting it "wrong". That's where the problem lies.

It's a responsibility dodge, and actually very common amongst folks trying to manipulate the perception of a situation in their favor.

@Bobotron There is apparently a guest power in TinyMUX. Hmmmmm.

I propose naming all guests, henceforth, Jill.

@Misadventure Apropos of nothing, I always wanted to make an Uncanny Valley-themed Nosferatu, somewhere, down to the perfect symmetry problem.

@Zyrus said in The 100: The Mush:

I do apologize that was what it was taken as, just saying that wasn't my intention.

Better, but dude... you're still not getting it.

It's not my fault she was offended when I said she had a fine ass I'd love to plow, I meant it as a compliment! isn't really an apology. Hopefully this random example pulled out of my own ass will make the reason why somewhat more clear.

Apologizing for what you're still presenting as someone else's error isn't apologizing at all -- it's more deflection and strongly suggests a refusal to examine your own behavior, let alone accept responsibility for the consequences of it.

@Zyrus said in The 100: The Mush:

@tek said in The 100: The Mush:

the first time i interacted with him, he started telling me about his kinks in ooc, apropos of nothing, then started posing in second person like he assumed we were gonna get our TS on. i've never left a scene so fast.

This scene was simply a bit of crossed wires from context.I had absolutely no intention of doing TS with our two PCs, ever.

Bluntly: if you're talking about your OOC sexual preferences without invitation, that isn't a case of crossed wires. Or if so, you need to consider how you're wired.

You're being told that something occurred that was unwelcome.

You should listen, and you should probably learn a thing from it.

Dismissing it and trying to hand-wave it away into nothingness by doing so is not making you smell like a rose garden, no matter how much you may want that to occur. This is the kind of shady bullshit for which there's not a hell of a lot of tolerance in these parts, these days.

Hint: If you actually had a genuine concern about a miscommunication occurring, you'd try to clear up that miscommunication rather than dismissing it out of a desire for it to simply go away.

I will joke about how some characters become so easy to play that I'm just their typist.

I don't think that makes them real, or that they have any existence of their own. It just means that whatever their combination of traits is, it's something that comes together well enough, and easily enough, that it's easy to portray without having to consciously think about it.

I can see how this could lead to someone thinking the character must somehow exist on some level, since it's entirely possible for the character's natural action-reaction flow to surprise me initially -- but that in and of itself isn't something that should surprise us terribly much, collectively, since there are certainly things that get us (the real people) to react suddenly, unconsciously, and without extensive pre-processing in ways that surprise us in the moment, too, and only make sense with later examination and hindsight.

@Auspice These people have no fucking idea. None. I have way too much 'walked to school in the snow uphill both ways' background with collecting shit from/through the 80s that I just can't even muster the urge to roll my eyes at such people. Spoiled little children, so help me.

@tek Did he go on about how all female M*ers are submissive with a side order of negging, or did he just start insisting you'd love to give over all of your free will to him while nattering on about how much he hates drama?

We must discern if this is Rex or Jeurg, I suppose.

Or if there's a third of their ilk meandering about... god, isn't two bad enough?

@Miss-Demeanor Sometimes that works, and sometimes it doesn't.

One of the ways a lot of players initially demonstrate the kind of organization, communication, and management skills that makes them good candidates for staff if new staff is being looked for is by running/organizing/managing a group, after all. The group and the game tend to suffer if you force people out like this if they decide to take on a staffing role to help even more. (This is a bottom-up example, which absolutely can be functionally different than a top-down example of someone in staffly power taking on a leadership spot after the fact.)

It also kinda depends on what kind of leadership roles being talked about. If there are dozens and dozens of them to go around, it matters a little less. If it's a minor group, that's a factor. If it's a private group (like the employees of an IC business with some clout or something) vs. 'is it a game-wide faction with major influence open to everyone' is relevant, too. Also... how people get positions -- if players in the group/faction vote for who they want vs. positions are assigned/etc. -- counts for a lot.

• Font of useless knowledge.
• Stubborn refusal to give up.
• Ability to pull off green rainbow hair without obvious roots for 3+ months.
• Pattern recognition like whoa.
• Living cartoon facial expressions/wild-takes.
• The ability to plant a foot, straight out at the side, at shoulder-height against a wall without stretching, despite otherwise being a complete chair-potato.
• ADD brainstorming-fu.

Weaknesses:

• Inability to tl;dr for shit.
• Height on par with the average female wolfblooded char on any given WoD MUX. (Read: 5ft, sometimes under at the end of any given day.) The way to put a stop to my evil schemes: put everything I need on a high shelf.