Jan 30, 2021, 11:26 PM
If I could just stop being ill.
Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.
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@ganymede said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
A friend of mine posed the following retort:
The true metric is not with the person who used the cart, but the person who sees the cart in the parking lot. Who left the cart there? Why did they not return it? These are pointless questions: the real question is whether you will return it for them.
I would remind your friend that the free rider problem and the tragedy of the commons continue to be relevant. If worldwide voter turnout is anything to judge by, people don't take affirmative duties very seriously even when their are consequences beyond 'socially taboo'.
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Achieving something of lasting importance is the highest goal in life
Strongly Agree - Agree - Slightly Agree - Slightly Disagree etcmotherfucker I'm doing a questionnaire for a phone center job and you're getting way too existential for this bullshit
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@insomniac7809 What truly sucks is that all these metrics they run these tests off of? They're based on jobs for a MUCH higher qualification level. So when the question was written, it was intended for someone with a big degree looking to take on a position with a high degree of responsibility and authority. But they c/p them wholesale for shit like phone reps and retail workers.
I am always tempted to write in a response and circle it to the effect of 'B**** I need a job to pay my bills, THAT is the highest goal in life!'
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@too-old-for-this To quote my SO in an interview: 'My tolerance for boredom is higher than my tolerance for poverty'.
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@too-old-for-this Even then, I feel like a question about what grans value to a temporary existence in an uncaring universe is a bit heavy for a job application.
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@insomniac7809 Agreed! I hate surveys of any sort for an application. If you want me to go through a personality profile, please do so after you've whittled down the number of applicants so you can pay a licensed person to conduct an actual personality profile and not just these stupid surveys that everyone fakes through anyways.
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@grayson ...did your SO get the job?
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@ninjakitten The SO did indeed get the job. And on the first day, was greeted by someone else who'd heard the quote from the hiring manager.
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It's heatwave and snake season here in Australia. So this is a message to my local snake community:
You guys have the outside groundy bit. Stay out of my goddamn window.
He/Him
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@tinuviel I will stay up here in icy, snowy, no snake land. And toast you with my coffee and crackling fire.
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If I could just stop being ill.
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@cobaltasaurus said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
If I could just stop being ill.
If it helps, I know how you feel. I'm not ill myself, but I've been constantly injuring and reinjuring myself at work due to management understaffing us, to the point I had to cut my hours down to 32 per week. I've no idea how I'll live on 80% of my current paycheck but I can't keep living in pain, either.
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I'd like a day with low/no pain. Just one, where I could feel like a functioning human being again.
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@cassite This. So much of this. You feel the pain, metaphorically. (and possibly literally). Thankfully, I had a couple of days where there was pain but I had enough energy to plow through work to be caught up.. and we're in a very slow spot, for the moment. So I can drag ass.
Otherwise I'd be in big shit.
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I'm not really angry or disgruntled, but I've had a long day and I wanted to blow some steam off about it. It's not really embarrassing, but there is a story. So.
Today I had two things to do. Pick up my kid's books at his school and then pop him over to the barber. That's it. I was keeping my expectations low.
This morning, my husband's phone was acting up so he took my mother in law's phone. And his. He never replaced mine from The Accident of 2019 where he destroyed my cellphone with his butter fingers.
I had to borrow my sister in law's car. Our second one is having a check up at the mechanic.
So, I was in a strange car, with no cellphone.
I managed to grab the books at my kid's school, and we were in a great mood. I turned on the radio and got three or four blocks away, stopped at a stoplight and then... something snapped. I couldn't get the car going again.
Felt like the clutch but also the brakes were weird too. Not important. What's important here, was that I was now stranded with my kid in an intersection.
All we had was Jesus. So I'm like JESUS SEND SOME HELP PLEASE. I can't abandon the car in the middle of an intersection. I mean I CAN but like, ehhh I'd rather not.
That's when two angels appeared (not really, some passerby's, and pushed my car to safety. I still had absolutely no way to contact help.
We are only about 3-4 miles away from home. No choice but to hoof it.
About a third of the way there I realized we were passing by my cousin's house, and he rarely locks doors. He can't even remember to lock doors and always leaves a gate open for me if I need to get in. AHA I said. Let me just... slip in there and call for help.
"Lets go back to the car," my sweet innocent child said.
"Why, what's the car going to do for us?"
"Maybe Jesus fixed it while we were away."We pursued to cousin's house.
Everything is locked up. But I thought, maybe, if we could get past the gates and to the actual doors, we can just get in. It's not like he could have remembered to lock ALL THE GATES AND DOORS RIGHT?
Right. So, I'm like, hey kid lets get you over this gate and you can try the door.
Suddenly, for the first time in his life, my kid is afraid of heights and despite 3 attempts, no - no he didn't go over the gate.
Personally, I'm wearing a pair of tight skinny jeans - but I'm not skinny - so I am not nimble enough to pull it off unless I take my pants off. And that's not going to happen.
So, I pull a 150lbs. cement planter over next to the brick wall after popping my nose over it to see where would be the best place to put it.
And I manage to get up on the 8-9" wall.
My kid hides his face in the wall against his clasped hands and starts loudly praying to Jesus that I don't fall and die.
Thank you kiddo for your vote of support.
I land fine, but have something of an out of body experience as I hit the ground. I've hurt my foot, feels a bit sore but... I'm ok. Nothing is broken.
I pull a lawn chair up to the wall and get my kid over, who's panicked and running up and down the length of the wall screaming.
He immediately gets, fully dressed, into the pool. It's of course, 9:30am so it's FREEZING and I'm yelling for him to get out because we have no towels. And now I'm limping around to all the doors and windows to see if there's a way in.
There is one door open. It is to the outdoor toilet in the garden 'center'. The others - and windows - are all locked. And now I don't think I'll be able to scale the wall again with my foot.
So I sat down and I thought. And I looked under every pot plant and every garden gnome and found absolutely no keys.
AHA! A friendly neighbor. I shout over the wall to him. He is obviously reluctant to me using his phone, and making phone calls for me, even though he manages to dial 3 numbers anyway - no one picks up.
Because they don't know the number.
Meanwhile my kid is screaming from the back yard, "I GOTTA POOOOOOO"
Remember the outdoor toilet?
Well my kid drops a deuce and it won't flush because there's no running water. I assume because the water is turned off, but I can't find a way to turn it back on. So. Whatever. At least he didn't do it in his pants.
I waited for an hour for someone to miss me and I thought about my sister in law in a couple hours, and my mother in law - with no way to contact me, they MIGHT send someone to look for me and they'd find the abandoned vehicle but who would think to look at me here, at my cousin's house? We would have to wait 8 hours in the African Heat (35 Celcius) with nothing to drink or eat, and with my kid just whining.
Time to break a window.
I find the heaviest object I can. It is an old cement duck sitting in a bird bath.
I'm about to throw it through the window pane of the door when my kid starts screaming "NO NO NO YOU'LL KILL US BOTH!" and crying. He's legit, terrified at this point and is crying that he wants to get home. I tell him to go stand aside... (he moves to the other side of the pool in case, IDK, the duck causes a nuclear explosion) and I throw it through.
It makes a small hole, so I kick the rest of the window out and slip through. Then, help my kid through.
I finally called someone. Uncle to the rescue. He measures the glass and orders it over the phone for pick up.
He takes us both back home and is fixing the car.
When my cousin comes home, he finds his wall has been scaled, window broken (but swept up), and someone has left a deuce in his toilet without flushing.
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@nyctophiliac This is an hilarious story. This is the sort of story your kids will tell when they grow up about their mom sorting a serious problem by breaking a window.
Pretty badass
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@goblin And it turns out the neighbor had a key the entire time. lmfao.
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@nyctophiliac
That story was a helluva ride.