Vacation.
July 25th. So close, yet so very far, far away.
@Misadventure What, you expected @HelloRaptor to save you even before receiving this new, strangely fitting update on his background?
@Misadventure said:
You know, this has replaced my image of HR as this suave and sardonic city slicker into a bearded gruff survivalist. In plaid. Maybe armed. He shows up in the middle of the horror film to tell you just how fucked you are, and won't be burdened with trying to save you.
I did in fact wear a lot of plaid at one point or another, it's true, but I'm afraid I've never really been able to make a go of the 'grizzled' thing. I did once spend the better part of a year living more or less off the land around Chicken, AK (less in that we didn't do shit like make our own clothes). Sleeping in a cabin, chopping wood, hunting for food (dressing, carrying, cooking, etc), and a lot of other physical shit that I only vaguely remember. I was probably in the best shape of my life after nine months of that shit, but even then I could never pull off grizzled. Mind, I was still a teenager, but I'm pretty sure I couldn't even now.
Part of it is probably that I lack the genetic predisposition towards heavy facial hair, and you have to be extra special to pull off grizzled without a beard or pretty heavy stubble.
As for armed, sadly my wife won't let me buy a gun unless... something. There was some condition, but I forget what it was. Maybe letting her buy a snake or something. Though I guess I do have a wide array of cutting tools.
He shows up in the middle of the horror film to tell you just how fucked you are, and won't be burdened with trying to save you.
I have a process that determines whether someone is worth saving, which largely amounts to assigning values to their Smart and Pretty, and requiring that it add up to at least n. So as long as you're not dumb and ugly, I'll help you out.
this key lime pie. that i am eating. right now.
The fact that there's an 84 year-old jewel thief out there, who's been in the game for 50 years. She hoodwinks judges with the confused granny act, plays shell games with the countermen, and walks out with the ice.
http://www.wbtv.com/story/29579907/cmpd-international-jewel-thief-84-targets-southpark-store
Go get 'em, Doris.
“Real magic can never be made by offering someone else's liver. You must tear out your own, and not expect to get it back.”
― Peter S. Beagle, The Last Unicorn
@The-Tree-of-Woe said:
The fact that there's an 84 year-old jewel thief out there, who's been in the game for 50 years. She hoodwinks judges with the confused granny act, plays shell games with the countermen, and walks out with the ice.
http://www.wbtv.com/story/29579907/cmpd-international-jewel-thief-84-targets-southpark-store
Go get 'em, Doris.
lerl that sounds like an episode of South Park
Oh, she's very real, and she's been in the game longer than my mother's been alive.
“Real magic can never be made by offering someone else's liver. You must tear out your own, and not expect to get it back.”
― Peter S. Beagle, The Last Unicorn
@The-Tree-of-Woe said:
Oh, she's very real, and she's been in the game longer than my mother's been alive.
yeah but I mean, wouldn't that make a perfect South Park episode?
I'm spooning a Barrett .50 cal.! I could kill a building.
@Shebakoby said:
@The-Tree-of-Woe said:
Oh, she's very real, and she's been in the game longer than my mother's been alive.
yeah but I mean, wouldn't that make a perfect South Park episode?
Only if you're ready for "pussy-pocket" and "jewel = clit" jokes. I admit, I grew tired of South Park about four years ago, but I enjoy other people liking South Park, because amusement is infectious. Likewise, I liked the Stick of Truth video game. It was way, way, way too long, but it was fun.
“If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe.”
― Carl Sagan, Cosmos
@Thenomain said:
@Shebakoby said:
@The-Tree-of-Woe said:
Oh, she's very real, and she's been in the game longer than my mother's been alive.
yeah but I mean, wouldn't that make a perfect South Park episode?
Only if you're ready for "pussy-pocket" and "jewel = clit" jokes. I admit, I grew tired of South Park about four years ago, but I enjoy other people liking South Park, because amusement is infectious. Likewise, I liked the Stick of Truth video game. It was way, way, way too long, but it was fun.
I liked the world of warcraft and old people driving and casa bonita episodes XD
I just received 3×180g bags of Salmiakki today. After shipping, even, it was under US$5. Not per bag. Total.
Of course, being the good family man that I am, I shared it with my family. My family who've never tasted any kind of licorice before, not to mention "salt" licorice…. My son put on a brave face and pretended to enjoy it (later confessing he didn't), but my wife and mother-in-law both promptly spit it out, looking at me like I'd suddenly grown a third eyeball for enjoying it. 
@WTFE
You are a monster for enjoying any kind of licorice. 
Also, things that I love: Snow leopards, ninjas of the wild.
@HelloRaptor I love licorice. @Eerie sends me boxes of the stuff when she's feeling generous.
"Excuse the hell out of you. He's a bag of dicks. I'm a carefully curated box of cocks." -- to @GirlCalledBlu upon being misrepresented.
@Coin said:
@HelloRaptor I love licorice. @Eerie sends me boxes of the stuff when she's feeling generous.
I rest my case. You monster.
@HelloRaptor said:
@Coin said:
@HelloRaptor I love licorice. @Eerie sends me boxes of the stuff when she's feeling generous.
I rest my case. You monster.
Ooga booga!
OK, maybe my eyes are fading due to age and to the fact it's past midnight ... but I don't see a snow leopard in that photo. Is that the joke?
@WTFE It's in there. The rocks in the middle, with a big frowny face. Just east of north off the centre.
Holy. Fuck.
I would clearly be as dead as those...gazelle-things, if I were there, because I definitely don't see a snow leopard.
Definitely a ninja.
Edit: OMG I FOUND IT. Daaaaaaamn
@thebird said:
Definitely a ninja.
Add to this the fact that they live on mountain slopes and can stalk rocky crags without losing their footing or making a sound, it would be more appropriate to say that ninjas are lame-ass snow leopards.
“It is better to live doing the things that you like. It is foolish to live within this dream of a world seeing unpleasantness and doing only things that you do not like.” -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo.
The fact that there's an 84 year-old jewel thief out there, who's been in the game for 50 years. She hoodwinks judges with the confused granny act, plays shell games with the countermen, and walks out with the ice.
http://www.wbtv.com/story/29579907/cmpd-international-jewel-thief-84-targets-southpark-store
Go get 'em, Doris.
