Feb 11, 2015, 10:46 PM
Fuck people that want to tell me how to raise/discipline my kids. They don't know my kids anymore than they know me and have zero logical input to offer as to which methods will work for them or me.
RL peeves! >< @$!#
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Fuck people that want to tell me how to raise/discipline my kids. They don't know my kids anymore than they know me and have zero logical input to offer as to which methods will work for them or me.
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@Miss-Demeanor said:
Fuck people that want to tell me how to raise/discipline my kids.
That rules out child psychiatrists of all levels, as well as the chance that normal people who didn't spend tens of thousands of dollars in specialty training and education from coming up with anything worth listening to.
Like: Don't leave your kid in the middle of the running track or they might get hurt.
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@Luna said:
Any one at any time can start a cps investigation for any reason. And it's anonymous.
A good friend of mine had CPS come to her house and launch an investigation because they'd gotten one of those anonymous calls. The call had been made by a psycho bitch she worked with (they'd have a personal falling out that was not related to her family in any way), and this person's mode of social revenge was calling CPS. The social worker didn't do anything more than visit a couple times and see that, indeed, the kids were happy and not abused. But it was eye-opening for me to see how that part of the system worked.
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To be fair, any time CPS doesn't follow up on a call, it can be reported on them and we've all heard stories on the news where people DID call, no one went out and a few months to years later - well, it's rarely been pretty. I appreciate that an anonymous option exists because if anyone's family is like mine, there will be retaliation if they found out who called.
It sucks that it's abuse-able, but it would suck even worse if people didn't call for fear of revenge.
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@Three-Eyed-Crow Happened to several people I know. They don't visit once, even if it's a clear cut case. They visit multiple times.
There's no good solution otherwise but one of the cases involved 7 agents because none of them did the proper paperwork or made any notes so the case kept tumbling around in the system. Malicious father (not seeking custody, just being an ass at the behest of his new girlfriend) tied up the system and stressed the mom out for no reason. Twice.
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@Thenomain Yes, it does include them as well since even they have nothing they can offer me in the way of practical, usable advice for parents that aren't idiots after viewing a 30 second slice of me and my kids. And my kids are both old enough that I don't have to worry about bringing them to a track.
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@Miss-Demeanor Whatever you're doing is wrong. I read on Facebook/tumblr/Pinterest that doing whatever you're doing will lead to eternal trauma.
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@Miss-Demeanor said:
@Thenomain Yes, it does include them as well since even they have nothing they can offer me
...
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People of craigslist, hurry up and buy my tea store gift card and RPG books. I have a burning need to visit friends and stuff.
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@Luna said:
Any one at any time can start a cps investigation for any reason. And it's anonymous.
Anonymity is not the same as immunity in Ohio. Under R.C. 2151.421(G)(1)(a):
" * * * [A]nyone or any hospital, institution, school, health department, or agency participating in the making of reports under division (A) of this section [which relates to statutorily-required reporters], anyone or any hospital, institution, school, health department, or agency participating in good faith in the making of reports under division (B) of this section [which relates to elective reporters], and anyone participating in good faith in a judicial proceeding resulting from the reports, shall be immune from any civil or criminal liability for injury, death, or loss to person or property that otherwise might be incurred or imposed as a result of the making of the reports or the participation in the judicial proceeding." (Emphasis added.)
Furthermore, the confidentiality of reports is codified in R.C. 2151.421(H)(1), which can be abrogated under certain circumstances:
" * * * [A] court may conduct an in camera inspection of child-abuse records or reports and also has the inherent power to order disclosure of such records or reports where (1) the records or reports are relevant to the pending action, (2) good cause for such a request has been established by the person seeking disclosure, and (3) where admission of the records or reports outweighs the confidentiality considerations set forth in * * * R.C. 2151.421(H)(1). “Good cause” is defined as that which is in the best interest of the child."
Johnson v. Johnson, 134 Ohio App. 3d 579, 585, 731 N.E.2d 1144 (3rd Dist. 1999).
So, it's not absolutely anonymous, and an elective reporter can be held liable for making a bad faith report. Since "good faith" and "bad faith" are nebulous concepts, making a report with less-than-clear facts will open you up to a potential lawsuit, regardless of your chances of a successful defense.
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@Three-Eyed-Crow said:
@Luna said:
Any one at any time can start a cps investigation for any reason. And it's anonymous.
A good friend of mine had CPS come to her house and launch an investigation because they'd gotten one of those anonymous calls. The call had been made by a psycho bitch she worked with (they'd have a personal falling out that was not related to her family in any way), and this person's mode of social revenge was calling CPS. The social worker didn't do anything more than visit a couple times and see that, indeed, the kids were happy and not abused. But it was eye-opening for me to see how that part of the system worked.
My sister has a haemophiliac kid and regularly has the social services (UK CPS) called on her. You would think they kept a note saying "mother not beating him, has bleeding disorder". She is very good friends now with the local social worker who keeps being sent out
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There are worse things than people sicking the CPS on you for stupid reasons. Like people not sicking the CPS on you if they think there's an actual problem. Apathy and some confused idea of it not being their business, is complicit in so much fucking misery.
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The worse thing I ever saw RE kids: Women had 3 toddler age kids. Locked them outside at sunup. Only let them back inside at sundown. In semi-rural Ohio. No lunch, no diaper changes, no supervision. My parents used to feed them, like feeding feral cats. They pretty much came to our house for food and attention.
They were running a brothel/dealing drugs out of the house. My parents called the Sheriff and CPS a lot.
After over a year, CPS finally took the kids.
Then my parents bought the house so they could force the women to get lost.
We had to clean it out with pitchforks, like mucking out a barn. Garbage several feet deep everywhere.
I decided my parents (compared to this example) were pretty good.
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In other news everything is bad forever and fuck it. Fuck it. Fuck it all. I lost my goddamned compsci book. Fuckingfucketfuck.
Meeeeeh, at least I owned it and it wasn't one of the rentals? : /
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Also-unrelated-to-child-neglect peeve:
Grown-ass men with no medical issues who don't throw their weight into a big move, but "sneakily" limit themselves to the small boxes. Come on now.
I am so sore.
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My peeve: F'n snow. Over the last 3 weeks we've gotten something like 36 inches with another 20 or so anticipated between today and Sunday.
I'm over it.
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Dear Neighbor:
I have no idea what's going on with your kid. All I know is they wail like they're being murdered all day, every day and have for the last 2 years. Are they poorly parented? I don't know. Are they being slapped around or being otherwise abused in some horrific way? No idea! Do they have some sort of spectrum or sensory disorder where normal things are extra baffling and scary or painful? Not a clue!
I also have no idea what your life is like. You are probably a good person who is 2 seconds from snapping and murdering everyone in sight. I would be if my kid was screaming their fucking head off like they were on fire for 2 years straight. The copious amount of weed someone in your house smokes is probably directly linked to this aforementioned situation to prevent mass murder or infanticide. I know that you're not from the US based on the extremely loud conversations you have with someone on the phone through an open window, so maybe this is some cultural approach to parenting.
That all said, mein got-- when your kid starts screaming their fool head off at 3 a.m. again for the nth time this month/year and this kid cannot self-soothe to save their life, I am halfway towards calling DCFS. The only thing that stops me is I have good friends who were investigated after their ultra precocious six year old was accidentally exposed to pornography at a playmate's house and then went to school and described what they saw in detail without any understanding of context. They ended up having to sell their house and leave that school district even after the investigation was over and nobody was found to be doing anything, because they were going to be under a level of scrutiny from then on based on the suggestion that something bad was maybe happening once upon a time. I don't want to put someone through that without knowing with reasonable certainty that something is wrong that needs intervention.
But something definitely isn't right, either.
"...and a single tube of glorious MAC Russian Red lipstick because I am a fancy motherfucker." - Muffy Bolding
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Dear Project Manager: FUCK YOU. Fuck your completely illogical and unachievable expectations for my job.
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Fuck ice in the walkway.
Fuck gravity.
Fuck what just happened when the two combined to wreck my back.
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@AmishRakeFight I would call. Actually, I would have called after a month of that.