I agree. That's the approach I usually take.
The problem I see is when the character is being a dick and the player doesn't want to accept the character being called a dick because the player gets hurt OOC. It feels like a 'get out of jerkass free' card, and I'm really not on board with it, nor do I think it's healthy for any player involved in such a situation.
@Pyrephox said in Emotional bleed:
Or, worse, the bleedover that assumes that 'oh, you play a sexist/racist/classist/whatever character, so you must looooove these things as a player'.
I concur with this, but also contend that this goes in the other direction, too, and is almost more problematic for doing so.
Character 1: Says something jerkass.
Character 2: Calls jerkass out for being a jerkass.
Player of Character 1: Hey, that's not cool. It hurts my feelings and I want you to stop.
...then maybe work toward that IC? You don't get to excuse what happened based on the fact that it hurts your feelings. And more and more, staffers are siding with Character 1, in these situations, and letting the player get away with things IC because they say they don't like the consequences OOC. There was a game where this recently happened, and before that, an entire conversation about the need for real consequences for IC actions, in which some vocal people here disagreed.
Bleed is happening, and IMO, it's becoming worse. It's also running both ways, and we should really take steps to remember that IC and OOC are distinct things, and what happens in one shouldn't dictate the other in either direction.
Granted, feelings are real, and some things can make people uncomfortable, but you very much need to maintain at least the idea of healthy separation. Otherwise you're gonna get into real weird territory where IC = OOC and that's supremely unhealthy for anyone involved.
@Wretched said in The ADD/ADHD Thread (cont'd from Peeves):
Man, I feel so personally called out by this.
@Ganymede said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
@Derp said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
Supposably and supposedly are used differently depending on whether something has been supposed or could be supposed, so depending on context they may or may not be using it correctly.
Just like the words Conservative and conservative, right?
(C'mon no one uses the words right.)
Or constitutional and Constitutional.
@Ghost said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:
@Ganymede I have a friend who says "supposably" and it drives me up the wall.
That's a real word though.
Just saying.
Supposably and supposedly are used differently depending on whether something has been supposed or could be supposed, so depending on context they may or may not be using it correctly.
@Aria said in The Work Thread:
@saosmash said in The Work Thread:
@Derp I'm literally preventing myself from getting paid by not doing this contract invoice and yet.
Why meticulously organize the SharePoint library of training documents, templates, and standard work that I get paid to manage.....
When I can meticulously organize the org charts, source material, and land holdings of imaginary houses for an online game I play for free?!
PROCRASTINATION PROJECTS.
@saosmash said in The Work Thread:
I really need to stop avoiding this one work task I keep avoiding but I have a whole lot of don't wanna in me and I seem to generate more at every turn.
I have a whole pile of those. Bankruptcy notices from people we don't care about? Yeah. You're just gonna sit right there until I'm ready to deal with you.
@Packrat That's really awesome for you! Glad that you found something that works better!
@Wretched said in General Video Game Thread:
@GreenFlashlight Wow, flash back to napster days.
Is it just on one Ares game, or all Ares games? Is this maybe a thing with the 'quotecolor' setting being 'blue' instead of a color code?
I mean, here's the thing as I see it:
Everyone is expecting that this is gonna go away when there's a vaccine. That might lessen the danger of the disease, but that doesn't account for the downstream effects.
Luckily, we've got some experience with that too. Polio had a vaccine, but we still had to deal with the physical effects of that after it went away.
It's not a magic bullet, it's a process. It's a process where we learn what damage was done, and we learn new ways to help cope with that. COVID-19 will restructure our society in the same way that polio did as the downstream effects of it become clear, and we create tools to help manage those scars.
It's not a perfect solution. But it's what we have. It's what we know. And there's only so much we can do at any given time. So no, the kids aren't alright. But they might be, eventually, when we learn the cost of what COVID does and start treating it the same way we treated the aftermath of polio, especially as we realize that mental health is as important as physical health.
But there are steps. This is a step. And it's a sucky one, but it's all we can do. You can't worry about what the smoke damage to the house is going to look like while the flames are still burning hot. You have to make sure that there's still a house to have smoke damage.
COVID isn't any different. Right now, it's a fire, and we have to get everyone out of the house. Even if that means that the place they're in is darker and colder than they're comfortable in. We can work on fixing that, later, once the fires go out.
Are they gonna bear scars from this? Yes, of course. The whole world is. But we can't prevent that. All we can do is respond to it when we get the fires out. Twisting yourself into knots about something that you have absolutely no power over and is completely unpreventable sounds like a good way to drive yourself crazy.
@silverfox said in The Work Thread:
I am utterly shattered right now. We were suppose to go back in person starting Monday, but today they abruptly made the decision not to.
I just had a parent text me (yes, I did give out my cell phone number because parents need every fucking tool they can get their hands on right now) and tell me about how shattered her kid is. He was suspended before we went remote the first time and she just said, "He was so ready to be a good egg" and I'm just... heart broken.
We just closed all of our schools here through Christmas, and cases continue to spike. This is the new reality now. It sucks, but... I think we need to prepare for the long haul on this one.
@mietze said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
And if the ACA detonates before December 1st im well and truly fucked for life.
Listening to the oral arguments at SCOTUS, I don't think there's any real chance of that. The justices seemed rather unimpressed at the argument.
@Arkandel said in Health and Wealth and GrownUp Stuff:
Fellow four-eyed nerds who also wear facemasks!
Do your glasses fog up when you breathe? If so have you found any ways to fix this? It bugs me, but the reviews for anti-fog sprays on Amazon show... iffy results at best.
The best way to avoid this, I have found, is to wear smaller, tighter fitting masks with the little metal bread-tie thing in the nose that you can use to shape and secure it. If you get one that you can keep relatively flat against the contours of your nose and upper cheeks, nothing fogs.
It's the bigger, looser, more 'comfortable' ones that cause the fogging problems. You have to be able to direct the air flow a bit better.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
@Auspice said in The Work Thread:
I got the job.
But.
I got the 2nd slot and (due to budget) cannot start until January.
So it's a good news / bad news. Yay I got a job I really wanted! Boo I have to strugglebus another 2 months.
But I can do it. Knowing there's a light at the end of the tunnel makes it much easier.
Is this the technical windmill whatever?
