@greenflashlight Why do you wonder this? Historically there have been many justifications that black people and brown people need white people to act as their moral guideposts because they're incapable of being anything other than crude heathens without them. It seems like a classic racist and colonialist argument that of course the ultimate arbiter of morality is going to reside with someone they view as white.
*Someone is sitting in the location and suddenly notices that they have a bug/spider on them. In that same vein, having a mouse run over someone's foot in a coffee shop/other establishment.
*One of the best scenes I ever had on my tow truck driver PC was when I was at a pick up scene at a diner and posed hooking up one of the other PCs' cars to my PC's tow truck (they could see this through the diner windows though it took them a little bit to catch on).
*Power outage at the location.
*play darts/spitball/some other projectile type of thing at a bar/similar location (this is especially good if you have a group of 2+ people and want to loop in a new arrival) and have the projectile hit on/near them/their stuff.
*Dine and dash (either look like you're trying to do it OR uh oh forgot my wallet/coin purse).
I think when one has an explosive kid, it rarely pays to escalate over email in the middle of the day. I've definitely worked with kids where when they were ramping up, I have verbally responded in a similar redirecting way. It can help to move the kid back on task than having an argument right then and there about language used.
Of course, I've also been the parent of a kid who told someone who was bothering them to fuck off at a much younger age (I found it interesting as did the person setting boundaries that had that said to them that they used it in the proper context but we did have a discussion later about not using words that are offensive or hurtful to many people.) And I have been cussed our quite a few times by foster kids in the 2-6 year old range as well as kids whose parents i really like and trust at a broader range than that.
That had to be jarring to see in writing though. And I imagine the administrative processes sucks too, so I'm super sorry that any teacher has to deal with that.
@Ghost I stated that when I wrote my post as part of it. Largely I enforce stated guidelines (and I communicate that up front). Usually if you do that people will be more aware the next time or they will never sign up for your stuff again. You cannot make anyone read or be time respectful but you can mitigate their impact, explain why, and hope that it sinks in.
I could have escalated a weirdo for the poor retail staff and I would have felt really bad. And it was probably more like 3 or 4 people instead of six (everyone waiting in the back of our line near the door waiting to check out.) But it did feel good even if my eyes are stinging from laugh tears getting sunscreen into my eyes.
I find that for whatever reason, players tend to reveal more of their PCs and be more open and giving when i'm running a scene for them in ways that they typically are not in acquaintance RP.
Since that kind of thing is kind of what really keeps me going MUSH wise, I can often sustain that desire to RP/create stories through STing alone, and have. STing is something I really really really miss.
It probably depends on whether they are visual thinkers too. I run into this problem a lot. Can't deal with the imagery that gets stuck in my head if someone mentions Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey ice cream. I still giggle literally every time on a mush I go into a bar/establishment and see people posing sitting on a stool. Frequent fliers (mostly profanity) don't get stuck in my head but a lot of other things do. I haven't met too many people with this problem, but I'm sure they're out there!
It is interesting that most of the mushers I know of that have successfully bridged into success in the fiction writing world or white wolf/other professional rpg writing...often are not looked at as great members of the mushing community, and at least 3 of them are reviled.
So I'm not sure that someone whose talent and interest is in stories and novels that they control wholly is a great candidate for entering the mush community.
@Ghost the "writing with others" is the key factor here. I cannot tell you how many times I have encountered people who were very rude or thoughtless towards others because they did not understand why people were reacting negatively or avoiding them, even though they felt they were writing beautifully, and had to handhold them through understanding that process.
Writing skill and interest isn't really enough, and I would not want to set someone up like that. I would rather be honest with someone I am inviting in, as to what they can realistically expect, and also thinking also of value added to the community.
There are lots of nice and awesome people who will not take to the medium, and some people who are constant problems who will still keep going at it.
I just do not see the value in recruiting just to have more bodies or handwringing over certain demographics. Build and improve the tools (add me to the long list of people praising Ares for making mushing accessible without the need for a special client or telnet, making slower time scenes possible, ect to reflect the realities of how things have changed tech wise and use wise!), but it is still mushing that has to capture people's interest, which it definitely will for some people. New people are still joining up despite more options for interactive entertainment out there.
And to be clear, a majority of dicks I have encountered in the hobby have outright said that they didnt really care to pay attention or interact with any story but the one that they felt entitled to control, and would engage in manipulative or abusive behavior to try to assert that control. Most were actually excellent writers, both in scenes and in fast talking ooc. It is why when I think of great people to invite to join the hobby, writing skill alone is not at the top of my particular list. I just know 3 very successful dicks out of the many more that I have encountered, two of whom were actually praised for their writing ability in scenes (just...not for their control/truthiness issues outside of it!)
I was super attached to fireworks shows as a kid. 4th of July was the only holiday where my dad was reliably on alert, and on base it was in general a huge party.
I always wondered why I did not seem to find them as much fun (and neither did my civilian kids seem to have the same attachment as I did at their age) but with some distance I think the attachment was more for the atmosphere and less about the 5 minute show at the end. (I did not grow up shooting off fireworks on base except for sparklers or very low grade ones--they weren't allowed in base housing. Which always amuses me when people locally here scream about fireworks bans disrespecting military people.)
I don't mind going to fireworks displays. I would not care about neighbors needing to prove how big their gonads are with their personal displays if it was possible for all refuse and fire damage to be contained to their property. (It never is, i always have shit i need to pick up in my field afterwards, never had a fire yet but on dru years we stay up late ready with the buckets and hose.
But around here the loudest mouths invariably want to do their business in a neighborhood cul de sac or park/school parking lot, and leave their trash everywhere.
@gryphter no, we havent all dreamed of how great monetizing would be. In fact it is a topic that comes up now and then as something that many people see a lot of pitfalls in and would never want, either on admin side or player side.
@ganymede yep that's where I am now, now that I am no longer drop dead exhausted after work and get home in time to reasonably cook dinner. It's been nice to have that little breather right before my oldest 3 are off to college--they've even remarked on it, that it's been nice to have a mama-cooked dinner almost every night, something that they've not really experienced more than 1 or 2 times a week for the last 5 ish years. It feels good to clean up/put stuff away/be able to do some upkeep too, I forgot how calming that can be for me personally, I've just been not able to do that regularly for a long time due to stress/illness/ect.
I'm sure this is just a window of time for this to happen but I'm enjoying it while I can.
@gryphter no, I am sorry. That may be something some people enjoy dreaming about, but a lot of other people have legitimate concerns about the business aspect of it. Either because that is how their mind works , because they have owned their own business before or have other applicable experience, ect. There was a brief fad of people trying to monetize mushes in the 00s, maybe late 90s. I think it could be done and there was one experiment where it went okay (but nobody "lived off" the game) but I do not think that's a model that is sustainable for how most folks want to run a game.
Well it looks like my cousin's husband will either not pull through or if he does is going to have pretty significant damage to his body. They booted her out of the hospital on home oxygen but she is still not in great shape and was told to expect a long recovery. The kids are all out of the hospital though the oldest kid is also on home oxygen. Cousin is now endorsing some MLM essential oil blend as what's helping her recover from covid with no hint of irony or shame. So now she and her kids (surely hubby will not be mentioned) will be cited by people as "hey i know someone who got covid and says these essential oils helped them get better!!"
To some degree i understand, who wants to lose their enmeshed high demand community they've been a part of for so long. And it feels real good to be the success story about how you refused the mark of the beast, went through your tribulation, and survived.
And now it will be a relief to just not monitor it in any way going forward, now that I know the kiddos are not in danger of dying.
@gryphter as I said, I'm sure some people would. But the numbers is the problem. Could reduce that with ad revenue or little boosts for in game stuff, but in my experience is is where the community gets uneasy about it real quick. And do most game runners want to deal with that sort of nickel and diming? You should probably hire someone who loves it (they are out there) but then that is another expense.
@too-old-for-this I don't know that they don't understand equality. I think they understand it very well. It's just that they quite literally don't want it.
Well that's the thing too. We represent such a small slice here. There are many games that go unmentioned here (probably a good thing). Considering how many people who are a genuine part of this community on MSB are by their own admission isolated from actually mushing either by choice or just time concerns, ect. I dont know that we as a community have a great snapshot on things either. That's not a strike against this community, it's just a natural thing that happens.
I do not think that we shouldnt talk or brainstorm about it, it is a fun topic, and if it reminds people to be friendlier on games they are on or to invite a buddy or like maybe NOT shit all over someone theme for a game they're thinking of opening, it is a good thing.
I see this convo as less about problem solving on high and more of a reminder to keep a open mind.
Sometimes people need help communicating.
I do not think that someone slamming a door in someone's face is necessarily more "right" than someone else trying to honor a friend's unexpected ask even while uncomfortable. It might be a culture thing (hospitality) or a number of other things that influence either reaction to someone showing up at their residence unexpectedly.
You and your friend could have called and asked if it was all right to come over also, so both of you could also be seen as having imposed yourself on other people.
Different people have different socialization as well as neurology (plus interaction between those things).
I think this is an important thing to consider when you're mediating uncomfortable communication especially on a text based real time environment.
Personally I do find it helpful to have some cultural expectations put into place even if you think its stupid to name them. I dislike having staff help to work through a breakdown in communication be seen as "getting someone into trouble" but I accept that many people will automatically assume the worst and may lash out at everyone or meltdown as a result.
Communication can be difficult even when everyone else's styles match.
@Tinuviel that is the nature of message boards. I think people can just chill or scroll on by if they choose.
