Posts made by mietze

I think a staffer's power ends at their game. I don't think that there's a universal fits all policy when it comes to incorporating off site information/behavior into a decision on the game.

I would not expect as staff on a game to control what people play about in gdocs. They can transgressive fanfic RP it up to their heart's content.

To be honest, a third party tattling under most circumstances would have me eyeing that third party. The main exception I could think of is if a player had been sending unwelcome links or harassing them via other methods when blocked from doing so on game. I hope this isn't common but for awhile on a game I played I did have that happen to me when another player got my email from a group organizational site (not even a RP one) and then started sending me links to stories they'd written where their PC assaulted mine. When I tried to get help for this from staff I was told since this was off site they wouldn't do anything about it. So I would remove a player from my game if they had already been told to leave someone alone on the game, and might have abided it there but started harassing elsewhere. Is that fair, I suppose not, but just in my own preference since that's very abnormal behavior, I have no issues removing people like that.

But that is harassing ooc behavior. When it comes to just storytelling between consenting adults? I might decide that I do not want that RPed about in a public sense on my games or not to support it at all with staff attention or the like, but I don't really care what people do outside of it. Unless they MAKE it my problem via indiscretion or boundary pushing.

Ugh, if you really must go on and on with a 90s WoD mush description level of wording describing about why you decided to like this recipe and what it means to you, and how virtuous and pennypinching (or granola or farm to table or WHATEVER) you are could you please put that at the END of the actual recipe instead of the beginning.

I kind of want to read transformers TS.

My 5 year old keeps on telling me he's using "destruction paper" for his project and it's adorable.

The trashier the better.

I am not a fan of Real Housewives or The Bachelor.

But to give you an idea of what I do love:
Anything Gordon Ramsey (But I've seen them all, UK and US)
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo (all time favorite until I found out about the pedo)
Hoarders (tied for all time favorite)
Married at First Sight
90 Day Fiance
Judge Rinder (not most other judge shows though)
Nightwatch

Anyone got any suggestions? I'm expecting a pretty stressful next two weeks at work and this is how I often unwind when I get home for an hour or so. If you don't want to out yourself as a trashy tv person you're welcome to PM me.

Getting teary eyed over scenes TWO nights in a row, in a really good way.

After months of being stressed out/absent because of RL (and slipping into that rusty disconnect that comes with that, at least for me), I have had multiple scenes (spontaneous/PUG and planned) in the last week that have really reminded me of why I love this hobby so much. I try to say thank you, I hope that people know it's genuine, because it really is and I've had so much fun this week on the game.

@Aria I am used to getting screamed at (it happens like...at least once every few weeks). Often when people actually come in they are in highly stressful situations, so it's understandable and not personal--and usually by the time I am done processing their transactions/getting things fixed either at my station or by calling on their behalf, ect. they've calmed down. Some even apologize. But this guy, with each problem I solved, and then each problem the banker solved, just kept getting louder and more trying to almost physically intimidate us. I was actually pretty close to pushing the panic button but then he abruptly took off (I bet he heard the 911 call, I didn't realize that our other customer had called until he was out the door). I am not a super woo woo person, despite being an LMT, but this guy had seriously scary-aggressive vibes. It really did remind me of someone in the middle of serious, serious road rage. But the really demeaning way he spoke to everyone even before the screaming started--you know those people who really are horrible to every server in a restaurant/cashier or clerk in a store? That was him except for like already 10X worse, and it's been a long time since I've had someone physically puffing up and trying to invade space. I'm still kind of freaked out about it!

Oh well, he has a note in our system now. Hopefully if he ever does that again regardless of what branch, he'll get his accounts closed and sent on his merry way. Maybe then he'll check his mail for his cashiers check.

Today we had a customer call 911 because she was super scared of another customer who was screaming and yelling and trying to get in the personal space of me and the banker. I totally understand why she did, this guy while not making direct threats had the energy of a massive road rager. He stormed out before the cops got there, almost knocking her down. Then we spent the next little while consoling her because she was worried about causing us headache/trouble.

What was this guy's problem? He "hadn't received" his paper statement. when our system showed that was mailed, he said he doesn't check that PO box often because it's inconvenient, and continued to scream and carry on about how the bank sucks. Not an account error, or anything like that. For that, this guy leaned all the way into my teller station, pouding his fist on MY side of the station, screaming so loud air from his mouth was making my hair move.

@Tinuviel said in TS - Danger zone:

Not everything is an argument.

It's just contradiction.

Today has been a really shitty day in just about every way imaginable, except for at least my 5 year old is still adorable and my teens are very sweet to me.

I think that feeds back into the issue of whether or not a player who isn't staff but has an IC leadership role must give up all personal RP or their fluff-n-nutter play in order to be plot/information dispenser (even if staff really doesn't give them a lot of plot to dispense and players being players, usually people don't share information with each other that much).

I think it is probably best practices for staff to fade to black unless they are pretty sure that the player is capable/willing to communicate openly if they are feeling that they do not want to do it. Sometimes people find it hard to just communicate to another player that they'd prefer not but are going along to please that person. I think it is more of a risk someone will do that with staff.

But honestly, otherwise who cares.

Both player and staffer should probably be prepared for some people to totally flip their lid and do the omg ts whore gets everything for TSing the staff thing, which probably doesnt feel great.

@Pandora here's the thing though. If a person knows that they are not going to be comfortable without negotiated cliff notes before they engage, it really isnt IMO asking for babysitting for them to ask that of someone. The someone can then decide if that price of admission is worth it or not. If the expectation is that no one ever has to ask for what they need instead everyone must provide exactly what they want by psychic deduction, I can see the point. Though isnt it the same if someone were to get upset and call everyone else spoiled babies because they never want to be asked for anything but instead want everyone to understand that they should never have to deal with that discomfort?

Unless a game has procedures spelled out (sometimes they do) I think it's better to assume playstyles will be mixed. It is therefore probably good if people are willing to be uncomfortable and speak up about what they want, and be willing to be uncomfortable and listen and say no and break it off or compromise, or comply, depending.

I think the majority of folks are relatively roll with it it, in my observation. But people with super strong needs either way should be willing to own it and realize that it might cause some hopefully temporary awkward feeling but ultimately a prevention of even more awkward down the road.

This is super difficult in practice though because I don't think most people are very practiced or willing to make the ask or listen to the ask, they just want things to naturally be their way.

@farfalla well in a sense that is my point. Instead of banning noncon RP (which is going to happen anyway), remove the people incapable of acting responsibly.

You can still be discreet while not talking through everything proactively ooc. It really isn't hard. And anyone should be willing to stop immediately any RP with someone who says oocly to stop. You may need to negotiate (with or without a staffer) for how to handle whatever it is (FTB and any consequences/aftermath decisions).

But even if someone were to solicit a rape scene from you, if they say during the course of the scene hey, I need to stop, then it should. If someone promised you ooc that their PC was going to be your PC's partner forevermore and during the course of the game they decide that's actually not the direction they want (even if you have talked about it and had fun with the ooc conversation), then actually they do get to stop being that for your PC. Maybe you talk about extrication or if there might be ic game impacts, but they do not have to continue on with what they do not want to do. (Doesn't mean that they get to dodge consequences).

I do not think that someone deciding that they do not wish to RP certain things with someone (even if they have before with that person or others) or noping out constitutes expecting to be babysat. Nor do I think anyone has a right to demand a proactive ooc conversation (unless that's game policy--ive seen that for agency removal play such as rape, "forced conversion" to another template, kidnapping to another org, ect. that both parties have to put in writing that they understand/ooc consent, to prevent ooc misrepresentation campaigns later).

I think any sex/relationship rp should come with a huge caveat emptor with a huge side helping of understanding that things can shift radically over time. You have to be willing to hold it with an open hand. If you can't handle people changing their mind then it might be better to refrain. That's not to say that you cant be sad/mad/confused, but I do not think anyone is really entitled to an explanation to their satisfaction. It is really rewarding and fun RP (IMO) but there is also some risk involved.

It's actually not hard to keep potentially offensive or squicky themes private. I think a lot more of that goes on than people think. It is just that a small number of (usually habitual) people dont enjoy without a non consenting audience or without being able to surprise people.

I kind of wish that games would just remove the "tee hee oopsie I was kidnapped and raped again! Come and save me/stop my tears by PKing someone!" Or "my God I forgot to ask before assuming I could impregnate/put you on a leash/whip out the oil can and traffic come, golly gee whilikers, dont get mad!" people, rather than declare a whole subset of RP, consensual or not, to be a bannable offense. But there are a lot of people incapable of discretion. And as someone who had to go through/approve tons of wolf blooded, thrall, and Changeling apps once upon a time...you know, there comes a point where reading one more emo mcDarkyDark write up about rape/white slavery/incest stuff gets to be too much. I think I have a super high tolerance, it doesnt bug me at all usually but even I hit my limit for volume on TR.

@Tinuviel or people saw other people doing it and followed suit. Bevause honestly, half the time I see people doing that people still dont respond to the pose correctly and that goes triple for scene sets (and room descs).

I will have to pay more attention when I have chances to scene but to be honest most places that I've played the last few years have many people incorporating descriptions of their PCs and clothing these days to the point I'm not real sure you need to even look at them.

Honestly I really do not care about PBs. I do not obsessively check people's wiki pages because i am old. (Unless theres a soundtrack section which in that case i look at everyone's). I am almost afraid to look because there have been times that, much like a movie made out of a book, that casting choice was such a mismatch for my mind's eye perception of that PC that it was a huge distraction. I tend to view PBs as approximations not exact. Actors can be made up to look very different from movie to movie. So it doesn't bug me to see modern photos in a medieval setting.

@magee101 yeah, maybe don't open with it. I'm sure not every person is gonna feel that way, but it can come across as you being pretty inappropriate.