Best posts made by surreality

@nyctophiliac Far, far more embarrassingly meek sea life has come close to killing me. I may have told that story recently here, though... if not I will add it later. I think I only got a baffled reprieve from the sea gods because my husband and I saved a mantis shrimp once... which we didn't realize was a mantis shrimp, and probably also could have murderized us. (It wasn't one of the pretty rainbow ones, and we didn't know there were other kinds until after that.)

Seriously, there's a reason I believe in signs and omens... all of my life is kinda like that. (Especially the part about Loki undoubtedly sitting back on high, scratching his chin, thinking, "This one, this one's fun to torment!")

Poor Bobby. He'd been trapped between the Italian ladies on the (longer) first leg of the flight. I can only imagine how many wallet photos of single granddaughters he was subjected to...

@ThatGuyThere said:

Earlier you said staff shouldn't hand;e their own jobs? Well why not? If it is just about people you can trust either you can trust them to handle their own jobs or not at all right?

That's a standard policy on every game I've ever seen, and every game I've staffed on over the years. You don't make judgment calls for your own PC. I've never not seen that policy in place.

Oversight doesn't get thrown out the window, nor should it. Trust is not blind lemming behavior, and 'trust, but verify' is valid. Oversight prevents so much more potential shenanigans than limitations ever could.

I'm far more in favor of the oversight approach than "do not ever".

As @Derp mentioned, most things that people put in jobs for -- XP spends make up the bulk of it -- are transitioning to automated things that players can do on their own. That involves trust, too -- and it's a beneficial system to have for all involved. Saves everyone time and energy and stress. Typically, some things are exceptions -- merits with special qualifiers, powerstat, a few others that may require justifications or notes or whatever -- and many are things that require a staff judgment call.

'Treating everyone equally' is a requirement. Love them, hate them, don't know them from a hole in the wall, everybody should get treated the same. Yes, this does include you -- but since other people don't have the ability to make that call for themselves, you need to be willing to let someone else make that call for you, too -- because that's fairness.

@Otrere Eep! Sorry about that!

...and, yep, we made it safely, about 12 hours later than originally planned. I then spent the next three days in utter heaven (OK, super humid heaven) because I was average height for the first time anywhere, ever, in my whole life.

(The hotel also had the best fresh Italian food ever. Don't ask me to explain how this was so; I can't.)

@Alzie I'm not saying 'werewolves exist in their own reality'. I have explicitly stated, repeatedly, that I don't agree with that.

What I'm saying, and have said repeatedly, is that it is valuable to have someone on the game who is most knowledgeable about that system to be the one to make the more complicated calls in regard to it rather than 'anybody can'. Because 'anybody' is not equally informed, period.

@SinCerely said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

@Kestrel said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

Garbage on Facebook about how x idiotic fad diet, 1 weird trick & 2 cups of chamomile tea a day or whatever cure anxiety.

I shouldn't let it get to me, but it really does. I want to throw rocks at it.

I gave up Facebook for the election year. Best decision ever so far. I might not go back.

I did this in 2016 and have not gone back.

It is a happier life since, no lie.

@Thenomain said:

@mouse

I think staff should be rewarded by having fun, same as the players. Why, what do you think staffers deserve for running plots?

I'd say treat the staff the same as players in terms of reward, if rewards are given. If they aren't given to players running plots, don't give them to staff either. If they're given to players for running plots, give them to staff, too.

Then it becomes much simpler: whoever is running the plot, they either get a reward or they don't, and it's the same reward regardless of who they are.

This really is the best thread in MSB history. Thank you, @nyctophiliac!

@Arkandel said:

Most of my plots are composed of long arcs even though I often run one-shot scenes which seem disconnected at a first glance, and those arcs themselves are acts in a larger story. If that's what you mean by 'campaign' then I have some experience in this area.

This is how I tend to approach things, too. It allows you to get a number of people involved in disparate ways that eventually come together -- or don't -- in whatever combination appeals to them. It allows for people to play to their strengths toward common -- or opposing -- goals, too. Added benefit of those with limited time still being able to become involved in a less time-intensive way and participate in aspects of the broader story arc that are of interest, but don't obligate them to be there or everything falls apart.

@Quinn I send every empathy hug in the world. I would share my pudding and chicken soup if I could. I had an extraction that went like that, once. X-rays didn't show that the prongs curved in a certain way because of the angle of the image. I swear, by the time they were done, I was convinced they were bringing in props from Dead Ringers to try 'em. (Ladies with teeth that hate us, unite!)

@Coin said:

@Insomnia, I kind of want to be able to drop in on people and just spring plot on them. I may do it occasionally on my game when we open and if they don't like it, well. I don't know. We'll see. But I consider myself someone who can entertain if people are willing.

I wonder how much of this comes from so many plots these days being combat-centric or 'monster of the week' style plots? I can see someone being uneasy about random lethal combat exploding around them 24/7, especially if the opponents are tailored toward the higher end of the scale. (On games like TR, they almost have to be.)

I would love to see more instances of something as simple as 'that week's monster is sighted' dropped on people in advance of whatever conflict is brewing in the fashion you're describing, then have media boards utilized to report the sighting via fringe outlets/etc. in a way that might drive more interest in joining the good ol' monster of the week event that particular week. I'm surprised I don't see more of this than I do, which does happen once in a while.

Obviously there's more that can be done with further-reaching plots, but even the simple ones can often be developed much more significantly than they commonly are.

I only wish I had a picture, but I do not.

Weaselwobble vs. Square Tissue Box: 0/2

It's that she got her head stuck in the empty box, and was so 'you fucker!' she dove after it and got her head stuck in it again, then kept backing up into things until she capsized and turtled, knocking shit over everywhere that makes me facepalm... while giggling constantly every time I see a tissue box since.

I emerged from my studio, only to have my husband ask, "What was all that noise?"

I simply held up the empty tissue box, and pointed to the cat, who was sitting next to me daintily on the floor, staring shame-faced at ground.

Me: "We need a constant go-pro with this cat."
Husband: "For posterity." <could no longer form words after that from the cackling>
Cat: <cringes and scuttles downstairs, looking over her shoulder the whole time in our direction like, 'racka-fracka-bastages'>

@Alzie said:

@Misadventure Players are never helpless, especially so in games. All it takes is clicking exit.

This is still more than a bit overly simplistic.

It isn't really 'click exit', it's 'potentially scrap a character you may have been playing for years and otherwise have excellent experiences on because a specific individual can't behave maturely enough to leave you alone'.

If it was as simple as 'click exit', this hobby would have substantially less angst-ridden bullshit in it than it does.

Youtube sent me a link to various means of sculpting for miniature landscapes using toilet paper and various gel mediums, especially to simulate water.

1. I don't do miniatures/model train landscapes/etc. and thus have no idea why this was recommended to me.
2. I have not previously explored toilet paper related crafts, and am not hoarding it.
3. I think youtube is fucking with us all recommending this now to random idiots.
4. I think months from now, this is going to be super useful for all the people who are hoarding more toilet paper than they will ever need, and we can expect to see entire DIY toilet paper 'water' walled rooms become a trend.

@Alzie said:

@Surreality If you are so attached to something intangible that you would rather put up with abuse than simply move on to another intangible thing then that's another problem all together. Amusingly, every time we have these arguments people always say that it's not as simple as hitting quit. The thing is, it legitimately is. Being abused online is not the same as being abused by another person physically face to face. Those situations are heads over hands different and when you say 'It's not as simple as leaving,' then you're right it isn't. However, in the case of an intangible thing on a game represented by nothing more than a line of text, there is no excuse. It IS as simple as never connecting again. You may not want to give up your investment, maybe you feel like you're getting the short end of the stick, but that's a cost-value decision you have to make yourself. Is the investment worth more than the abuse or is avoiding the abuse worth more than the investment? Nobody can make that decision for you, but don't give me that shit about it not being as simple as clicking exit, nobody is physically abusing you, there is no legitimate reason that you can't just leave.

You really just... utterly fail to see the real flaws in this logic.

Someone doing nothing wrong should not have to trash their efforts -- in any respect -- because someone else is doing something inappropriate.

You're also seemingly blind as to how this actually encourages and fosters abusive behavior on games, as what you're saying is that the target of inappropriate behaviors should simply go away, and nothing should be done to the person who is actually behaving inappropriately.

It sends the following message: if you behave wretchedly enough to someone you dislike, you can force them off the game, and if they don't leave, it is entirely OK to continue to behave abusively toward them, and abusive behavior is totally acceptable.

That is simply beyond astonishingly stupid and damaging to a game on the whole, and sooner or later, you're left with nothing but abusive assholes on your game.

If that's not what you want your game environment to be? You do, actually, need some basic codes of behavior on a game, and authority figures to enforce them.

It is the abusive behavior that is not OK, here, ffs.

HOLY CRAP the hand cramps.

I have never ever ever been happier to have hand cramps.

I haven't actually drawn anything in well over a decade, since shortly after the last art school, save for a few very small bits over a summer that was still well over a decade ago now. The creeping dread was real as fuck.

It's going to take a WHILE to adjust to the toolset, but it could be going so much worse for so many reasons.

@Cirno said:

@surreality

Well, that escalated quickly.

I wonder if anyone told that guy that he could have just gone to Shang or Taps or FS if he was desirous of that.

In all seriousness? He does.

On Shang, he asks for consent for a scene with certain parameters that are reasonable, gets it, and then proceeds to do something that vaguely follows that format but goes so far beyond what was asked for and granted permission that I know of at least two instances of players either having to call in support from faction/establishment authority figures of some kind or disconnect to avoid him, since if you point out that he's gone beyond what he has permission for (which will be by miles, not inches), he will immediately accuse you of creating drama, going back on your word, and being unreasonable. Never mind that the other player was asked, "You cool with a scene where you're tied to a chair and teased?" and what was then posed involved engaging setting NPCs (not under his control) to aid in tearing her apart and raping her character to death with demonic weirdness and brutal, mutilating torture and gore. He doesn't see anything wrong with this. (I was the poor fucker who ran the establishment where he tried this who had to look over the logs I was sent in case the player needed IC assistance or asked if we could use the code we had for the business to ban him from the premises.)

This is not the kind of player this hobby needs, but... yeah, in terms of escalating quickly? So much 'unfortunately, yes, pretty much that.' Just not how one would expect. Basically, he found a whole new way to be abusive and horrible even with what the standards of behavior are for Shang.

This got put on hold 'cause I can either kill the hand cramps (even if they're fading) or the oh gods why do I even have these organs I never wanna use for stuff monthly shenanigans, which more or less have me coiled in a fetal ball and whimpering through re-watching The Last Kingdom to catch the new season at the tail end.

I used to make paper dolls, because why not. They were fun to doodle and it meant getting to draw all manner of crazy outfits. This is one of two I've been working on since getting the tablet, which will get picked up again once the ow-ow-ow-someone-call-Moses stops. (The other has boobies still visible, so not posting that for obvious reasons.)

There's a full nekkid person under the outfit, which is on different layers in photochop. She's done, it (obviously) isn't. Colors and shapes taken from a fantasy princessy dress spin on succulents.

But seriously 3 days of digital inking for a nekkid lady blooooooooows. I redid it like a dozen times before finding a better way for the second one, but yeesh. Ow, hand.

@Sovereign said:

@surreality

I find the best way to communicate with a player base depends entirely on your function within the staff. The person in charge, who handles punishments, dictates policy, and is the End of the Line, so to speak, should have minimal contact. They should engage primarily in imperatives, not conversations, and be polite, firm, and concise.

On the other hand, a lot of games can benefit from someone whose job is entirely to mediate and manage PR. This should never be the same person as the first, as "authority figure who dishes out punishment and is the one to tell people No" conflicts immensely with "friendly person I like and trust and can confide in". To many, authority is inherently intimidating. A person who exists to connect authority and player in a more comfortable and removed fashion is handy.

This person could use image macros! It wouldn't be the worst thing. They're inherently lighthearted and that's comfortably disarming.

I'm more or less the opposite of this.

I'm pretty decent at policy-crafting (though shit at policy-wording at times) and tend to be fairly approachable and willing to listen to people on both sides of an issue, and even at making hard calls.

I require a 'You are not listening to the boss, so let me make this more clear if you need to hear it from someone who doesn't have ovaries' staffer. Because sadly, unless you're willing to be a PHB from hell, the whole chick thing has been relevant more than I care to mention.

@Aria I actually can't even articulate the level of <internal screaming> that first half pic inspires. It really, really wants to externalize, on... on... on... like... a 'this photograph depicts cluelessly smug white male privilege if it was an actual face' as an opener and just taking off from there.

Sadly I just got up from a nap and haven't coffeed yet. So I probably have that woman's 'I am dismayed by literally everything I see here' speechless face.

So I'll just go with this for a reaction right now:

@Sovereign said:

@surreality

What does PHB mean? Google calls it a Dilbert reference.

I don't think it matters if you're male or female, provided you're willing to exercise the power you have. If someone disrespects you for having ovaries, that disrespect lasts only so long as you'll tolerate it; I'm sure after the first temp-ban people would get the message. It's about boundaries more than genders.

Respectfully, while I have no idea of your gender, or how it may impact your experience, 20 years in the hobby informs mine and, uh, I'll not really go into how clear I am about boundaries, but it's safe to say I'm almost a joke around here at times in regard to how stringent I am on that particular front.

It's unfortunate, but true, that there are some folks who simply will not listen to a woman's call on something without engaging in some pretty sexist asshattery. In some cases, these are dudes who played in tabletop games for years that never had women in them so they're not used to the idea of a woman involved in an RPG period, and then there are others who are convinced female staff don't know the rules as well as the male staff, and then there are just some jackasses that whip out the no woman tells me what to do! card.

Each of these types is distinct, all of them actually exist out there, and each one is something to handle differently.

The first lot generally clue in pretty quickly and chill with demonstrated competence; it's a culture change, something outside their experience and therefore sometimes on the border of a comfort zone, but once they figure out everybody's there for the same 'having fun playing this RPG reason', it ceases to be an issue. This type generally surfaces based on game rule calls more than policy matters, too.

The second lot are a split. Some have lingering beliefs about female gamers that are inaccurate similar to the above, and others are just trying to push someone they perceive to be weaker in some fashion around to see if they can get away with it. First step is to figure out which you're dealing with and it isn't usually hard.

Like the folks from the first example, the people in the first half of this group generally chill the hell out once they realize you're competent. Sometimes, this means having someone with testicles tell them the same thing once or twice to get them to clue in. Is this profoundly stupid? Yup, it is. Doesn't make it any less the actual reality of things. Again, these folks usually surface over game rules more than they do over policy matters.

The second half of this type? Yes, they are testing boundaries. RPG rule or game policy, they're going to push it, because they're dumb enough to think they can get away with it. It... tends not to go well for these people. Like the last type, which I will just lump in here because the solution is the same, they get handed off to someone else because personally, I'm very nice until I'm not. (There are probably folks out there who think they've seen the 'not' from me staff-side, but they haven't, and there's a reason for that.) That gets handed off to someone else.

"Don't be a dick" is a bad law; too nebulous. But it's a fine game rule, because these are small, purpose-driven communities. And, yes, while you'll still get people who will argue about what constitutes being a dick..

.. those people are usually dicks. People know what's appropriate and what's not. They use ignorance as an excuse or simply assume they won't be called out. They're correct with disappointing frequency.

Essentially, yes. That's not the kind of policy I'm talking about, for precisely those reasons.

All the same, it's very likely we have an entirely different style and approach to things, despite points of agreement here and there. Really not keen on the number of assumptions being flung about nor the rush to conclusions, though, to be frank. One of those boundaries of mine involves avoiding condescension, so... yeah.