Stuff Done Right

[Silver]

@ThatGuyThere said:

I dislike the unfindable flag on principle but I use it, because it might just be a few bad apple but boy are they bad.
One every game I start out findable and then only turn on unfindable after getting pages about why are you rping with so and so, or omg you are in a private room you must be tsing or what not.
Sadly it is not an isolated thing i end up setting myself unfindable on between 1/2 and 2/3 or the games I have played on. ddly enough I must not attract the popular type of crazy cause Reach was one of them I never had to.

Pretty much echoing what I said there, yup. Same reason I unfindable myself.

[SG]

@Misadventure said:

So here is my deal: I like random meetups, but I have found that VERY often once there are 3-4 people in some public place, I get inundated with people coming in, who are attracted by the people already present, but who don't want to be part of that scene. So they bring in new times of day, varied posing rates and IC time coverage, along with all their antics, and pretty much destroy what I was doing, and move on.

Ug, this used to happen all the time on KOTOR. I like 2-3 person scenes the best, things can move at a decent clip. But then a whole faction descends once someone realizes there's public rp going on and it turns into a word salad with people yelling at me OOC for skipping them in pose order when they're not even interacting with me or the people I'm rping with.

[Ganymede]

@ThatGuyThere said:

I dislike the unfindable flag on principle but I use it, because it might just be a few bad apple but boy are they bad.

That's actually a good argument for disabling it. It helps you locate bad apples. It's much better to learn of them this way than after you've inextricably linked your PC to them.

[ThatOneDude]

@Silver I want to just start paging people now and saying, "I noticed you are unfindable... Who you TSing and do you need a third?" >.>

[Coin]

@ThatOneDude said:

@Silver I want to just start paging people now and saying, "I noticed you are unfindable... Who you TSing and do you need a third?" >.>

"Hey. I notice you're set Unfindable. So... who're you TSing and do you think there's room for some more meat in that love sandwich? ... No? How about a pickle? Cucumber? ... tomato?"

[Silver]

@ThatOneDude said:

@Silver I want to just start paging people now and saying, "I noticed you are unfindable... Who you TSing and do you need a third?" >.>

For you I make room.

[ThatOneDude]

@Coin We need more STEAK...

Edit: I will now lean back and watch the waves of down-votes pour in >.>

[Luna]

I got slut shamed. I was bewildered as to why this didn't create more rp for me. My TS is totally stuff done right.

[Pondscum]

I don't mind unfindable code, I just find it a peeve when people are persistently unfindable, even when in public, on grid, engaged in scenes. Sorry. No. You're not unfindable. Go hide!

[Misadventure]

How often do people RP out "bad relationships" that aren't rape, and are exposed to other players? How often do people RP through breakups and reunions, affairs and so on, ON PURPOSE for the point of RPing stuff. I've only ever seen IC relationships be great until the OOC relationship changed, then it just ends. Sometimes with OOC recriminations, rarely (but not never) with IC recriminations.

[Coin]

@Misadventure said:

How often do people RP out "bad relationships" that aren't rape, and are exposed to other players? How often do people RP through breakups and reunions, affairs and so on, ON PURPOSE for the point of RPing stuff. I've only ever seen IC relationships be great until the OOC relationship changed, then it just ends. Sometimes with OOC recriminations, rarely (but not never) with IC recriminations.

I've tried in the past to varying degrees of failure and success. It's hit or miss but one thing is clear: you have to be EXPLICIT with your RP partners that this is what you are going for.

Don't spring it on someone. It ends badly every time.

[Sunny]

While I know it's easier to just '@set me=unfindable' when faced with the bad apples, the more appropriate choice of action is actually 'p staff=Hey, so and so is hassling me about being in a private place with someone else. Can you let them know it's not cool?' (better) or 'page creeper=Hey, when you bug me about who I'm playing with it makes me uncomfortable' (best).

Yes, the flag is an easy solution, but it's also an incredibly passive aggressive solution that does not in any way, shape, or form deal with the problem, but instead addresses the symptom.

Unfindable enables passive aggression. It also enables those bad apples to go 'oh, no, I had no IDEA who the person was playing with, she's unfindable, I didn't see anything' and makes cheating along these lines much more difficult to address.

Harassing someone about playing with another person? This is generally against the rules on any given game; the key in this one is the word 'harassing'. Using OOC knowledge (obtained from +where) IC when this sort of thing is not permissible? Against the rules, the key for this one being 'cheating'.

Make (and enforce) rules that actually address the problems themselves, not the symptom. If you have some guy paging people with links to him jerking himself, the solution is not to @wall for everyone to please pagelock themselves. See?

ETA: tl;dr: All unfindable really does is let assholes keep being assholes.

[ThatGuyThere]

While I fully agree that unfindable does not solve the problem unless I am staff solving the problem is less my concern then enjoying myself. I so not see it as passive aggressive I am simply choosing to make my information known, it is no more passive aggressive then me not typing my ssn on the forums. While I would report something that rose to the level of harassment the problem 90 percent of the time is a minor annoyance that is corrected with a minor fix.

[Silver]

@Sunny I don't feel the need to tell on somebody to staff and have someone else be my daddy, but more to the point I also don't feel the need to "fix" someone's behavior issues on a game because I get really fed up of fixing people's behavior issues for them. They're not going to change anyway.

[silentsophia]

Man, aren't you a bastion of positive thought?

Why not tell staff if someone is harassing you or something? Sure, most of us can't make people fix their behavior, but a lot of the time it's derp not malice. Social ineptitude (captain semantic-pragmatic language disorder reporting in!) is not rare in this hobby, and most people stop when bluntly told so.

[Sunny]

@Silver said:

@Sunny I don't feel the need to tell on somebody to staff and have someone else be my daddy, but more to the point I also don't feel the need to "fix" someone's behavior issues on a game because I get really fed up of fixing people's behavior issues for them. They're not going to change anyway.

And thus, you are part of the problem. If someone is breaking the rules, why would you not tell staff? Particularly if they're making you actively uncomfortable? We're not talking about kindergarten bickering here, we're talking on a mush violating stated policy.

@ThatGuyThere
If it's a minor annoyance then it's not a problem.

---

This is exactly a display of the behavior I'm referring to in my previous posts. This is again making wide-spread decisions and the like based on a couple of bad apples. Both of the responses above prove my point in the addressing of the symptom rather than the problem. Thank you both.

[Silver]

@Sunny said:

And thus, you are part of the problem. If someone is breaking the rules, why would you not tell staff? Particularly if they're making you actively uncomfortable? We're not talking about kindergarten bickering here, we're talking on a mush violating stated policy.

That's me. Part of the problem. I'm the part that chose to dress like that. I mean, just look at me. I was asking for it!

[Sunny]

@Silver said:

@Sunny said:

And thus, you are part of the problem. If someone is breaking the rules, why would you not tell staff? Particularly if they're making you actively uncomfortable? We're not talking about kindergarten bickering here, we're talking on a mush violating stated policy.

That's me. Part of the problem. I'm the part that chose to dress like that. I mean, just look at me. I was asking for it!

Did you really just make this allusion? Really? I maintain my position; you and people that have your attitude are the reason we can't have nice things. I'm going to make a wildly inappropriate comparison as well, because yay!

If someone breaks into my apartment and I just sit on the couch and watch them steal my stuff, okay. Generally I'm going to want to call the cops (it's illegal, and all) but hey, I don't want to tattle, that's fine. So I remember to lock the door next time. The guy comes back the next day, finds the door locked. He's going to either try my neighbor's, or come in through the window. For the sake of argument, let's say he comes in through my window, and grabs most of what's left of my valuables, then leaves. So...rather than calling the cops (nobody likes a tattletale!), I lock my window.

Smacking me and saying 'you should have called the cops the first time' when my apartment gets broken into on the third day is not victim blaming.

It just isn't.

[Silver]

@Sunny You really think that's inappropriate?

[Thenomain]

I have seen one good use for the unfindable flag: Rooms. People, not just a few people nor just troublemakers, will use the meta information of who's with whom for political gain. I see that you are off grid with the Sherriff, and you said you support me 110% against him, I may have the final bit of evidence that you are lying to me. I can act on this without reproach because who is going to be able to prove that I'm abusing OOC information?

Answer: Nobody,

This happens even with the unfindable flag, but I've not seen any evidence that the epidemic of this from the 90s has stopped. People are going to be people, and in this case I think it's one of those times.