@PuppyBreath -- Are we maybe related? Because your family sounds an awful lot like my family, and my family pretty categorically sucks right now. It's been a long, slow slide into sucking, but they do in that special sort of way that makes them morally indignant about 'freeloaders' while also simultaneously complaining about how broke they are because my mother lost her job a few years back due to her own laziness/stupidity. But they deserve help, being hard-working Americans. (Read: white.)
If you ever need a sympathetic ear, please feel free to hit me up. I know how incredibly frustrating a situation like this and what it's like to be angry at yourself for not speaking up and 'being a bitch' -- both from years of being conditioned not to stand up to horrible people and because you were too busy staring slack-jawed, wondering how the fuck these people spawned you.