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    2. Aria
    3. Posts
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    • Posts 1260
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    Posts made by Aria

    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      @Ominous Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeah, that's definitely a thing. They used to have a center a couple of blocks from my house, before it burned down. Now it's a Baptist church.

      It was a strange thing to have in our neighborhood because it used to be mostly Jewish, now it's mostly black with a significant portion of the residents either being Caribbean immigrants or Sunni Muslim children of former Nation of Islam members, with a former synagogue turned into a rather large and active 'Church of Christ' at the end of my block. Most of the former Jewish resident now live four or five blocks over in the suburbs and go to a very large and very pretty Jewish Cultural Center at the edge of the neighborhood, but still own family businesses on our side of the city line. Or to this very, very Orthodox temple across the street from this super hippie Presbyterian church that prides itself on being inclusive, political activism, and posting really, really funny church signs.

      Weekends in our neighborhood are weird to say the least, but also mostly kind of wonderful? to watch. Even so, the dudes that I can only describe as doing a bad 'Yul Brynner in the Ten Commandments' cosplay stood out. Like a lot.

      They're angry and nasty and made everyone uncomfortable because they're super racist, usually ranting and waving about signs that Jewish people are impostors who stole their identity and the white man is an agent of Satan. Oh. And one of them yelled at me once about how women are the devil. So there's misogyny, too. Do not recommend.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: RL Sads

      @Sunny

      So, one thing that I tell people over and over - and @Testament has heard this from me literally yesterday - is that it's really hard to be someone who is both pretty smart and mentally ill. When you're smart, you take pride in that great big brain of yours! You come to trust it and its ability to synthesize information, solve problems, think creatively, etc.

      But here's the thing: Your brain is also full of lies.

      It tells you stupid shit like, "Ohh, Aria! Silly girl. None of your 'friends' actually like you. They just put up with you and never say anything about what a wretched burden dealing with you is because they're just too polite. Don't believe anything nice they say to you! That's just social expectation. You're really just a pile of hot garbage."

      So you get frustrated. You get frustrated with yourself because you have this otherwise pretty cool brain that just malfunctions in this one particular way and why, why why, can't you just make the stupid thing work like it's supposed to??

      My honest to god recommendation is to start dissociating from your negative self-talk. Stop treating it like it's a part of you and start treating your anxiety/depression/OCD/PTSD/whatever like it's the shittiest roommate imaginable. You don't like them, in fact you hate this asshole, but they're on the lease that is your head and you can't just kick them out. It is a whole lot easier to talk back to your negative self-talk when you've made it into a little caricature in your imagination that is the sort of wretched person that starts off sentences with things like "I don't mean to sound racist, but....", who literally never pays you back for anything ever, and who dents your car but insists its fine 'because you have insurance, anyway, right?!', etc.

      Treat your negative self-talk like it's the sort of person whose opinion you'd never give a shit about, anyway, but would instead mutter about behind their back/under your breath and it's a whole lot easier to ignore.

      "Nobody actually wants to---"
      "Did I fucking ask you? No. No, I didn't, so shut up."

      Trust me (and my therapist) on this.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: RL things I love

      I swear to god when this is all over and I'm expected to wear a bra for 12+ hours a day again, there's gonna be a goddamn riot.

      #WFHforever

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Dead Celebrities 2020

      @Macha said in Dead Celebrities 2020:

      John Lewis.

      ....Fuck.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Covid-19 Gallows Humor

      alt text

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Good TV

      @Ganymede said in Good TV:

      Kids' shows are getting so good.

      I laugh so hard at this clip all the damn time.

      "You have bunk beds" was the line that did me in.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      Dear Neighbor Whose Car Alarm Will Not Stop Going Off While I'm Trying to Study for My First Grad School Final --

      I don't know which one of my many neighbors you are, but I do know that I fucking hate you. Come deal with your shitty car.

      Regards,
      Aria

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: RL Anger

      @JinShei said in RL Anger:

      Someone who is retired: We need to do these five things (meaning JinShei and JinDaughter need to do these things)

      Someone who is retired: We need to do these five things (meaning JinShei and JinDaughter need to do these things)

      My response to these sorts of people: "That's an excellent idea! Thank you so much for volunteering. I'll let everyone know to direct anyone with questions about those five things to you."

      Folks tend to back down real fast.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: RL things I love

      So, my favorite aunt passed away fairly horribly last week. (No, this is not the thing I love, clearly. That was the thing I spent several days ugly-snot crying about and if you've wondered why I haven't responded to anything on game/Discord you sent, that was why.)

      What I love is her youngest kid, the youngest of my cousins, and her only daughter. She's 20 years old and far, far too young to be navigating all those important things that women have to figure out in their 20s without a mom to guide her. I told her point blank that as absolutely wonderful as her dad and her older brothers are, they're a dad and an older brother. There's some conversations where they will mean well but not understand, and for every one of those, I want her to call me.

      I was afraid she wouldn't.

      She just texted me to ask for help finding dresses for her November cello recital because she only really shops at one store and doesn't really know where to go to get a formal gown, especially in her size range. I'm seriously getting weepy talking to her about the secret stores that have good plus-sized clothes, how to get the best discount, and which stores actually have dresses with pockets.

      My mom wasn't -- isn't -- a particularly good mother. My aunt tried to do a lot of these things for me when I was 20, to make up for all those gaps my mom left with me. Now I get to do the same thing for my cousin.

      feelings

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: RL Anger

      @mietze said in RL Anger:

      @Cupcake luckily I pick my own, and will. It is pretty exhausting though and bringing back some medical trauma that has blindsided me a bit emotionally. (I had some medical care negligence many years ago that had some significant health impacts to me as well as almost leading to the death of one of my newborn twins, took about 5 years of intense therapy to be able to deal with the PTSD around that. This is a VERY different situation and nowhere near as severe, it's rather mundane and run of the mill for people who are fat, really,but for some reason it is triggering those emotions/memories like whoa. I'm thinking because of all the external unrelated stress.)

      I am feeling vulnerable. I loathe feeling vulnerable. But I know it will pass.

      Ahhh, yes. The "everything medically wrong with you is because you're fat" experience.

      I know that one well and it absolutely infuriates me. My favorite was probably the time I must've broken my foot because I'm fat. No, fucker. I broke my foot because I'm a clumsy dumbass and fell down a set of concrete stairs. I also don't have depression/anxiety/C-PTSD because I'm fat. Or allergies because I'm fat. Or migraines because I'm fat. How about we just assume I weigh whatever it is you're going to tell me I'm supposed to weigh and start our treatment from there, cause I also had all of these problems when I weighed less and exercised three hours a day/six days a week, thanks?

      In short, I'm really sorry you're going through this @mietze . The bias that fat people and women both face when seeking treatment for literally anything is well-documented and it is bullshit. You deserve better. And you have every right to tell them that.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      @Auspice My father once told me when I was 15 years old or so that I shouldn't have cut my hair short because the boys in my school wouldn't like it.

      Given how many threats he had made of the 'dating my daughter' type, I looked him right in the eye and asked, "Daddy, do you really think I should make choices based on what the boys at school want me to do?"

      The look on his face -- and the ensuing silence -- was priceless and I have not forgotten it to this day.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      @Ganymede said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

      @HorrorHound said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

      You mean every Keanu Reeves movie - ever?

      I suppose except the ones where he plays a toy, a bush, and Theodore Logan, right?

      Bill & Ted Face the Music drops on August 28, 2020 and I AM SO FUCKING HERE FOR IT.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      @HorrorHound said in Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.:

      You mean every Keanu Reeves movie - ever?

      alt text

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: MU Things I Love

      @silverfox Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

      posted in Mildly Constructive
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      Third day in a row now that I've woken up with less than six hours of sleep, for absolutely no reason, and in most cases several hours before I need to be up. I don't know what I did to upset my body so much, but apparently we're having a fight right now. Like it's come down to this:

      "Hey. Good morning, Aria. And by good morning, I mean GO FUCK YOURSELF. Have a horrible day! <3"

      Like, why? Just why?

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Car Shopping

      @Ganymede said in Car Shopping:

      @Macha said in Car Shopping:

      I, too, drive a Nissan, and the CVT is actually something I like.

      My partner has a 2012 Nissan Rogue equipped with a CVT. I enjoy the smoothness of the ride and the absence of feeling a gear shifting.

      But I dread having to pay to fix that motherfucker.

      I'm considering the extended warranty options for much that reason. Supposedly the 10 yr/100k warranty goes for $2200 at Subaru, but I've seen some people saying that they've negotiated it down $1500. That effectively doubles the warranty on the most expensive repairs -- the powertrain -- from where it normally sits at 5yrs/60k, and as evidence by the fact that my two previous cars have been a 2007 Saturn that I'm still driving and a 1988 Cadillac that I drove until I bought the Saturn new off the lot....

      I drive my cars into the ground. Usually, any sort of extended warranty or protection coverage is hard pass for me, but if it guarantees me ten years in a car, I think it's worth it.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      @Auspice I think blood just shot out my nose.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Real World Peeves, Disgruntlement, and Irks.

      Holy motherforking shirtballs, guys. Being the only person with an arts & humanities degree on your MBA group projects is absolutely the worst.

      Every single assignment where we push closer and closer to the deadline, I'm the one frantically editing seven to ten pages of syntax, diction, and like... pages of grammatical garbage fires so that the very smart people I'm working with don't end up sounding like absolute morons. And then going back and fixing the references because now they're all out of numerical order since they won't just use MLA.

      a) Be nice to your editors.
      b) If you've ever joked that English majors can have a great career waiting tables, you deserve to be punched in your big stupid face.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Car Shopping

      @Ominous So basically the idea with a CVT is that they're supposed to be carefully calibrated to maintain optimal efficiency by moving through a continuous range of gear ratios (hence the name CVT - continuously variable transmission). Theoretically, this is great! It's an automatic transmission, but even better! WHEE! Fuel economy goes up because of the lack of fixed gear ratios, everyone is happy.

      The trouble is that wear and tear on them tends to happen much more quickly as a direct result of all those repeated movements, reducing their durability and thus the vehicle's reliability. And because they are more complicated machines than traditional six-speed or seven-speed transmissions, their breakdown -- as @Ganymede indicated -- tends to be a very expensive shitshow for the owner.

      Unfortunately, it is also harder and hard to buy a new car without one. You can read a good article about them here.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
    • RE: Car Shopping

      @Ominous said in Car Shopping:

      @Ganymede said in Car Shopping:

      The Crosstrek is built on an Impreza frame and uses Subaru's infamous Boxer engine.

      Wait. Subaru uses boxers? I didn't realize anyone still used boxers. I may have to buy a Subaru as my next car.

      Yep. Like, universally.

      posted in Tastes Less Game'y
      Aria
      Aria
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