Best posts made by Macha

@greenflashlight It was just a statement. I pee in a cup tomorrow for new job that pays better. So here's hoping next week I can tell this job to fuck itself.

So, yet ANOTHER appointment reschedule for the ADHD meds.

This is the third time - for this appointment.

And now? Suddenly I also need to do a urine test - WHY was that not included in the tests I did over a MONTH ago now, to try and get this all done? And I can't get an appointment to go pee in a cup until AFTER the appointment that is scheduled.

This chick wasn't even IN THE BUILDING at the time of my first appointment. She told me to go get the tests done at the local hospital - they had no record of those tests ordered. I got the tests done, and now I'm still sitting here, fighting for all this. And with ADHD, being the one who has to keep track of everything? HAHAHAHA

@sunny There may have a squee from my roommate who brought the box in. There may have been happy shouts and some dancing around the living room.

My roommate has been amazing through the hell of the last two plus months. She has cheered me on getting a new job, and she sent me links to anything she could find I might be remotely qualified for.

...there may be booze-a-holing tonight.

@betternow I still hear him in my head from the Replacements (I have a strange love for that movie) "I love to see a fat guy score." "Why?" "Because you get a fat guy spike, and then you get a fat guy dance!"

So the Rheumatologist who wants me to stop taking acetaminophen, referred me to a neurologist to try and see about my headaches.
That was late Friday.

They called me this morning, and by some miracle, had an opening in the morning. Like.. wow.

I had to reschedule my endocrinologist appt, but the endo can get me in in 2 weeks. The neuro would be in June.

ETA: Neuro ran super late.. and did nothing but poke at me and make me fill out stuff no one looked at and most of the answers are already in their file. I can not take tylenol for a month.

which leaves me with no pain relievers, other than MJ. This will be fun.

@buttercup I confess that I don't know you. But this I do know. You didn't screw anyone over. You were doing everything right. You were kicking ass and taking names.

this is just a step back. It's a cha cha, not a permanent backwards move. Things will come together and work out fine.

I know this may sound cold to suggest (and I do not mean it to be), but maybe set up a gofundme or something similar, to help you get through the immediate rough patch? I know it's not something anyone wants to do, but it could help maybe ease some of the pressure off you, and let you breathe.

Well, right now he's doing okay. He's on the meds they gave me, and doesn't seem to be in pain or anything. He didn't cuddle me in bed the first two nights after the vet, but last night he did. Who would think I would having him as a bed hog?

@derp He's at least eating decently, and doesn't seem to be in pain. And he's back to constantly wanting the petting

Roomate has a new kitten, because a friend had one brought to her (she has cats) but could not house it even over night. Roommate wanted kitten eventually so...

I just got home and saw the news. I am sad. She was a brave woman. (You KNOW people said nasty things after 'the kiss' )

@Derp That's what I keep telling myself. But I still keep thinking "Shit, I need to take Logan out." Or think I see him from the corner of my eye. I know this is all completely normal, when the mainstay of 9+ years is suddenly gone, but.. ouch.

May I present to you, Remy.

@Arkandel -sarcastic response incoming- But Arkandel, they only allow /nobles/. Clearly a noble family wouldn't have such ongoings.

(sarcasm over)

I am super excited. Tonight I get to see Trae Crowder live!!

I grew up on Pepsi, but now I'm all about the Dr Pepper. The diet kind. I know they're switching to zero sugar, but it's still super scarce here, so I stock up on the diet.

I miss the good flavors, though. The cherry vanilla Dr pepper, or cherry vanilla coke.. black cherry IBC.

Well, since @Cobalt decided to go to that other Forum, where she is fully aware I do not go, and would not make an account at, to display half-logs and even more half-truths, here we go.

1. I had gone to Cobalt, about someone I had done a fair amount of RP with, that kept saying they didn't want to share the logs. I could see it on some of them, the more emotional stuff, or revealing weaknesses. I asked her if it seemed Sus or Red Flagg-y, and she said it did. I said I was trying to work it out with the player, and not get staff involved. I should have told her straight up, the player was Isaac, and had it 'on file', because I am totally certain the log he sent her came after that interaction I had with her.

2. While I have have not indulged in going over to BMD to read the endless slagging I've been told by a good dozen or so is going on, I have been shown what she posed as her proof my character 'attempted SA' and then gaslit another character, was not the whole log, nor did she share, or claim to have seen any other context.

Now, when I told someone that I was frustrated that Isaac's player was resistant to sharing (And Isaac's weird insistence they were not in a relationship, but more than friends, etc) , they suggested I download all the unshared scenes before I went to him and tried to explain why it matters to me, and before I went to Cobalt. So I have 9 logs, since the 10th one was shared just before I was banned.

The log in which Cobalt says my character attempted SA on a character rolling on Molly (and possibly mixing it with something else is hinted at - Do not read if you are uncomfortable with RP mention drug use/someone being high, or of friends cuddling/ a kiss aimed for a cheek and hitting the jawline.)

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1TL2I-xoQropEpSdRP4GZAFVhH2N4wl14PRNYQY9-7Gg/edit?usp=sharing

Also, it may be just me, but since they have enhanced senses, you'd think he'd know she was jerking his chain about the sex thing right away. And - honestly? If tucking drunk/high friends in, and sleeping next to them (in case they get sick, the high goes bad, etc) and even snuggling is attempted SA, I guess me and a good dozen of my friends from my partying days have a lot to answer for?

That scene started on 2/14, and ended a couple/few days later, due to RL. Their very next scene, was started on 2/18 - the night of the amateur night at the Peach. She'd mentioned it to Isaac previously in yet another unshared scene, but this scene references the one before it.
(There is again off screen drug use, mention of it, and description of a striptease. There's discussion of accidents and death, due to drugs.) This scene reveals the secret Cobalt made us put into our app for the game, and at least partly why Mackenzie was so emotional in the first scene.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CGAwTgMma2u9gixcEx0gHJAUiBFZqJn44dSvznAv640/edit?usp=sharing

Add in the fact Cobalt waited days to Ban me and in light of knowing I was having issues with someone I'd played with a good deal, she never thought to take a second and think about that, it seems, or speak to me at all.

Could Isaac's player have altered the logs he gave her, if more than one? Certainly. But the copy paste I was shown of the log chunk she shared was similar if not the same as the one I'm sharing, so.. you can judge?

@ominous You say "Mandate of Heaven" and my brain goes to a 20 year old Video Game "Might and Magic 6: The Mandate of Heaven." ... and now I have to find it somewhere, download it, and play it.

Somewhat similar to @Auspice - if we make plans, and you say you'll let me know when you'll be here... let me know if you're NOT FUCKING COMING. resists urge to kill

@hobos If Cobalt had spoken to me, I could have pulled up the pages from the time of the scene, where he and I had checked with each other multiple times to make sure everything was cool with the other, and offering to edit things if the other wanted, etc. Everything in that scene was discussed/consensual.

That scene was not at all cathartic to me, btw. Years of therapy are the only reason I can even confess publicly it happened without getting panicked or crying.

When someone you super enjoyed connecting with on a game...finds you off game because you fell off (damn work). It makes me happy.