Posts made by mietze

There are definitely other ways to do it, though as a potential new tool was being discussed, I thought I'd weigh in.

If you were to use something similar on game, if the concern is that one person might derail a whole scene were topics were disclosed in advance, why not tool it as something that a player can signal a no-harm-no-foul you guys are awesome but I need to exit (without worrying about offending the others)?

I know that we have had FTB for years, but there can be some negative assumptions and comments that result (or people THINK that there will be, because of past experiences). I have said before I think most problems of discomfort and communication breakdowns tend to happen because people do not know how to exit quickly and graciously (or accept another's exit). Maybe this would help if adopted into the culture.

@Ghost it doesn't really matter. That info is out there no matter who you do and don't talk to on a mush. I was stalked by my worst creeper guy only by things that are required for me to do by law, and the legal info databases out there.

Sure you could not go anywhere, belong to any clubs and never be part of a profession far requires state licensing I guess.

I am far more worried about freaks showing up somewhere because I'm a massage therapist than I am mushers.

I find it is more common for people to feel resentment or discomfort because they are projecting what they think others will think/do. So they go along with what they think others want and then feel grumpy and that leads to a cascade of other things. So like, if a scene is veering into topics they cant be part of, instead of just making a good exit and try to pick up later or just telling people that they are digging the group but things are heading into CoI or whatever they will stay and fret because they think if they leave everyone will hate them (almost never is this true).

I see more problems arise sentiment wise when someone doesnt allow themselves to be able to leave a scene politely/positively and so they stay where they are bored/uncomfortable/irritated. It is definitely a skill to be able to leave a scene well and oocly positively, I think people often feel awkward about it, and there are a lot of bad feels/perceptions of others/fretting as a result. That can feel like control on many ends.

I agree. I have no issues with people pushing their own comfort zone in storytelling/writing/whathave you. I think telling stories about things that terrify/sadden/excite you is straight up human nature.

But. When one's issues become used as an excuse for behaviors that negatively impact the game, or one uses them as a method to control others, that's when I draw the line. Though I am fine with game runners choosing their own theme/boundaries and making them clear. Or players who need to nope out of certain themes.

Very few people use their issues to be abusive to people, imo. The ones that do are memorable though. Sometimes they do better sometimes not. But I think anyone regardless of past behavior (beloved or loathed) should not get a pass for destructive behavior on a game.

It is actually super easy to be tracked down by someone who wants to, even if they have very minimal information. I had a man that I met at a bible camp when we were teens, knew for 1 week and then had no contact with (and I had moved 4 times after that before I left my parents' house!), track me down in a new state 20+ years later, harass me at my business and show up at my business when I was not there and then show up at a public meeting of the organization I was a board member of and sit near me until he finally introduced himself after the meeting. It was the first time I had seen him since bible camp. He wanted to apologize to me for thinking lustful thoughts and committing adultery in his heart.

Did he wave a gun at me no, but I will tell you that was fucking terrifying (a judge agreed and granted me an anti harassment order a few weeks later, not that it would have protected me if this guy escalated).

It is not hard that if a sick fuck gets it in their head to track you down they can. It can and does happen on mushes as well. Not always by showing up in person, but people starting to contact you on other media platforms and emails (I'm not sure how people sleuth that but we do have a lot of sleuths in the hobby. Whether that is stalking people or trying to find out who is who).

Leaving a game/just looking at it as words really doesnt do justice to how it feels when it happens to you. There are some genuinely ill people out there or those who get off on doing gross stuff like that if they feel slighted.

It is possible to listen to someone's tale of woe and not be drawn into the drama. It is also possible to have empathy for the person who has a lot of excuses for bad behavior and still neglect to get drawn into the argument or talked into no consequences. There's a wide spectrum of responses.

It is possible also to be proactive and smart and still get your ass bitten by a bad actor. Or allowing someone to get a rise out of you. It happens.

I do think that if the posts were filtered out for being positive/just gifs/off-topic rambling, that the skewing of "omg you people are so negative!" would be lessened considerably. But the venting is always going to be higher than the yippyskippy, I'm sure.

It can change drastically between characters, for me. I prefer that, since it helps me a lot to get the widest variety of RP/helps with the restlessness.

I think I enjoy the hobby a lot more now than I have in the past, in part because I no longer feel as compelled to do a lot of emotional labor for others. Or solve every problem that I see. And it's nice to have friends that when I DO get hung up on either one of those things, will lovingly or bluntly tell me to knock it the fuck off.

I definitely enjoy the hobby, including (especially) the people in it, far more than I don't. Are there people who trigger sad feelings and frustration in me, sure. But no more than any of my other hobbies, and usually a hell of a lot less!

In regards to multi-scening, I do not think the majority of people do it well, including people who think that they do. I do not mind slowness, so perhaps I dont care as much, but it is irritating when someone who you've been waiting and waiting to get a scene with appears to be totally checked out despite your best efforts, or they protest that everything is fine (if someone seems really distracted I usually ask them if they'd like to reschedule or do things via ic mail or even talk it out, if they're not feeling it).

But.

I find the people who obsessively check the who/where and keep tabs on alts and comment to/about those alts while activity is going on to be extremely creepy and offputting. I do not think this is the intention but it comes across to me as extremely controlling. It is an instant turnoff to being involved in RP with that player, and I have instantly ended scenes where that person pinged my alt that had no association with them as if to check up on me. If you want me to avoid you, "playfully" paging my alts with questions about my activity or commenting about where my alts are located or if they are on while I am scening with you is the #1 way for me to dump your ass as a RP partner immediately.

@Thenomain we were talking about the differences between NPCs and pcs. All people on a game, whether staffer or player, have the ability to create rich RP and immersion and story. NPCs, in my opinion, are more targeted tools. Stating what an npc does does not preclude a PC from doing so also. Not sure what your point is in trying to make it seem like I said pcs cannot contribute to theme, plot, or immersion. I didn't. Not particularly interested in arguing that.

I think people who run PrPs of their PC getting to be the star of the show should have to disclose that in their PrP first. It's not any more fun when a player storyteller does it!

I have had a character fart out loud during a scene (hey, I was playing an ogre, so.). Another player posed their PC smelling it and reacting.

I do not think anyone who had two brain cells to rub together would have considered that interaction to be plot advancement, or a meaningful touchstone to the story of the game. Funny? Sure. Livening up a boring as fuck meeting? Yes. Did I get more RP invites after that from people I didn't know before? Yup.

But. Still not advancement for that PrP or even my PC's story. I daresay that NPC farting at someone probably wouldn't be either. Unless it was a giant dragon farting on the king to start a war or something.

@Thenomain No, I don't consider someone throwing a bottle and another person getting hit by it in game purposeful in-game direction of the game, sorry.

@Thenomain npc implies some purpose of plot or in game IC direction/supervision/touchstone utilized by staff.

A PC could be anything. Maybe they'll be great at handing out/disseminating plot, or maybe they will just sit in their ic apartment with their thumb up their ass while they brag about their stats or overshare about their RL on chan, but the choice is theirs.

@Tinuviel it certainly can. Though I've seen it happen with smaller games too, when certain attitudes take hold. Not sure how that can really be prevented per se. I think it might actually just be part of the natural death cycle of a game.

I agree with @sparks and @faraday but man have I seen some spectacular screaming-ass shitfits, harassment, and temper tantrums vomiting everywhere by players at even a game /closing/. How DARE that staffer CLOSE that game rather than HAND IT OVER, they are evil because that game belonged to US not THEM! To a very unhealthy level. Like the people who act like an author owes them more books, or whatever.

Are they outliers, yes. But I do think there is a not insignificant number of people who may not act like a total asshole, but do indeed believe that a game is owned by the players who play on it just as much if not more than the people who run it. I think then a game's population reaches a certain level of expectation of that is ironically when it tends to go way out of control, because people no longer give a shit about any kind of vision but their individual one, and that gets real chaotic real fast.

I thing agribusiness as a whole has a lot of horrible things associated with it, from slave labor to genocide to monopoly across the whole system to human and animal suffering and injury and death to racist marketing and financing strategies. It would be very hard to go back to a small farm model right now though, so I am not sure what the future holds. It is something that was discussed quite frequently in school though even in the 90s (I was an animal science/family and child development double major).